Urgent help Plssss

[wiziliz]

I have this horrible horrible neighbour who lives down me. She wants my kids to be super quite all day for the rest of their lives. She screams at me , says all the filthy stuff etc. Today she shouted at me cursed me and my kids, I have been very cool , told her off in the past ,today I maintained my cool and invited her for a cuppa to talk about the problem. She will be here in half an hour, I need advice advice advice on how to handle her. ( she is in her late 50s /early60s) I can't move or either will she. Ladies pls help me..

She doesn't have a good reputation in the neighborhood, people just be nice to her face so she doesn't give them a hard time.I am feeling very dizzy and nauseous..and anxious about meeting her. But I really want to kinda pretend and be nice so she doesn't torcher me..I don't have any other solution..

It’s worth a try have you bribed the dcs to be silent?
She sounds pretty unstable so stay very very alert. Be super friendly but don’t let your guard down!
Hope it goes well.

I wouldn't let her in the house to be honest. At the very least she will really upset and scare your dc.
Check with other neighbours how much your children are disturbing the peace.
Don't be scared or intimidated it will only help her to bully you more

Oh goodness. Provided your kids are generally well behaved and it's just 'normal'kids noise, it seems like the problem is hers (especially with what you say about the neighbours).

But in the interests of neighbourly harmony, yes, be super nice let her vent (But stop her if she gets angry etc) and then with a head tilt ask what suggestions she might have.

Worth a go as you say, but if that doesn't work, ignore as much as poss!

Trouble is that if you show people like this any signs of weakness they will jump all over you.
You can be super nice and friendly but also emphatic that kids will NOT be quiet at all times and you will NOT be told how to behave. But you will be friendly and helpful to her as long as you are both friends. You will be a bad enemy though if she isnt friendly to you. Dont let her stomp all over you.
How can she torture you? If you mean harrassment thats what the police are for.

Thanks everyone for the replies, she is a bully, people told me ,only after I moved in...my kids are well behaved, she once came around to mine and shouted at me bcoz my kids were singing...I am waiting for her, my heart is beating fast..

Good luck OP! Do not be bullied, do not show any weakness!

Met the neighbour..she seems like a psycho!
Me: so what kinda noise is it disturbing you, kids running/ chair pulling ( I have put those pads from Ikea for chairs.) etc
Neighbour: NO NO, THERE IS SOME KINDA OF NOISEEEE!
ME: pls tell me what kinda noise so I can solve the problem.
Neighbour: repeats the above ,and now goes towards the door,
I told her people around ,did tell me you were a bit difficult person,but I really don't have the time and energy to fight, I want to have good relationships with my neighbours. She told me she is going to ask everyone about who bad mouthed about her to me.! I saw her going to few people and talking, she also told me she will ask this from me when everyone is around. How do I handle this pls. ??? She is a NIGHTMARE!

What's the occasion when everyone will be around? Just say you can't say, as it would be a breach of confidentiality. Even a breach of the Data Protection Act ( not true, but it sounds good).

You don’t handle it, you stop engaging as you can’t reason with crazy. Have as minimal contact as possible and explain to your kids that she’s batty and they shouldn’t listen to what she says to them.

if she keep approaching you and shouting and swearing start logging it with 101, so it being intimidating and if your heart was pounding, you were feeling dizzy and nausea at the thought of her arriving then she is clearly frightening you. do not live in fear esp since you have children it will be a matter of time before she starts on them too.