When did you first leave your baby?...

[FirstMumToBe]

And for how long?
Curious x

I left my ebf baby with dh for an hour or two right after a feed regularly from three weeks old. But we didn’t leave him with anyone else till 6mo. Dh in particular missed him like crazy during the week and would not have wanted a weekend away. Me being home all week might have been tempted 😛
But we had a few nice hotel stays with ds too.

I'm going away for a night on Friday, it's my 30th! I know I'm going to miss him horribly and my boobs may possibly explode but it will work out as less than 24 hours away from each other which I'm sure we'll both cope with. DS will be 9 weeks, he is breast fed but takes expressed milk in bottles like a gannet.

Mine was about ten days old - grandparents pushed him round the local park (asleep) for a few hours while we had a much needed nap.

Awake, I left him for about an hour at 4 weeks to go to the hairdresser. First overnight was at about 15 months for wedding of a very close friend of DP to which children weren't invited.

I have only ever left him for overnights with grandparents, specifically my DM, who I know is well able to cope no matter what he gets up to

For an evening around 3-4 months, overnight dd1 was 2 years old and dd2 was 15 months.

Gosh Cole, how vile are you!
Why would you be so judgemental...

Coleworld don't be a dick. My DD stayed with my parents overnight at 3 weeks old so I could go out with my friends for my birthday. It was amazing. I'm an incredible mum- the whole thing has come so naturally to me and my daughter is developing perfectly! She's so happy and smiley and sleeps/feeds well and we have a wonderful bond.

But I'm still me. I still have a husband, a job and friends as WELL as a baby. My pregnancy was so rough and birth was even worse- that night our for my birthday was just what I needed to feel human again. A couple of cocktails and a good dance made me feel like myself, which has actually helped me to be a better mum.

Me and DH make loads of time for each other, as well as time as a family, and it means we have a healthy marriage and a great sex life. People say the first year is the hardest- but not for us. We know we are lucky to have such a great support network so close by and we use it. DD has had several sleep-overs over the past year and she loves it! She has a great relationship with all GPs and they love to have her!

I'm not a bad mother for needing to have a life and socialise occasionally! You may think 3 weeks sounds too soon but my God, it kept me sane and you are in no position to judge. No one is- like everytjing else in life parenthood is To Each Their Own.

I agree with the more reasonable posters above - feeding dilemmas aside, it's all about what you feel comfortable with and what you think your baby will be ok with. We turned down an invite to a wedding which turned out to be when DS was about seven weeks old - it wasn't specifically no kids but the logistics would have been a nightmare and DS was still permanently attached to my boob.

OTOH, I might well have left him with my DM earlier had the opportunity arisen - she is basically his third person after me and DP and despite living some distance away, has seen him more weeks than not since he was born. He just had his first sleepover at their house (previously they've always come to us for overnights), aged 2.5, and had a ball.

My children are grownup and, you know what, I can’t for the life of me remember when I left them for the first tome or for how long it was.
I probably spent ages deliberating about the rights and wrongs at the time but 20 odd years down the line it really doesn’t matter. Obviously so long as you don’t leave them with a random stranger!

My first was 8 days old when I left him overnight. I didn't have him for any nights after that until he was 4.5 weeks old.

My second is 16 weeks and on Friday I left him for 20 minutes while I dropped my parents to a local hotel. He cried for most of the time I was gone apparently (he's ebf). I don't plan on leaving him any time soon

At 6 weeks, I first went out for a few hours with a friend and left DS with his dad. I was breastfeeding though, so couldn’t be away for long.

In 2 weeks time, I’ll be leaving my DS (7.5 months by then) for 2 nights with his father while I go to a hen do.

We will then be leaving him in early June (almost 8 months old) overnight with a good friend when DH and I attend the wedding. This will be the first time we’ve both left him (but that’s mainly due to lack of babysitting offers than that we can’t bare to leave him).

Mine are 3 and I've still never left them. Everyone / every baby is different, there's no right or wrong.

12 months and I've left her for nursery, hair cuts etc, but not over night. Work are pressuring me to go away for a conference which I'm dreading.

When ds was a few weeks old, my FIL fell seriously ill and we thought he was dying. I had been ill in pregnancy and was recovering from a caesarean so not up to travelling. Dh bought bottles of Aptamil and set off on the train so his dad could see his grandson before he died. FIL made a prompt recovery and lived for another two years: plenty of time to enjoy ds.

I stayed at home and spent extra time with dd instead.

I was glad he went, it mattered a lot to all of us.

As for my dd, the first time I left her was when she was 4 months old: I went abroad to a 4 day conference. I missed her, but probably no more than her dad missed her when I took her to visit my parents. She was with her dad and the freezer was full of breastmilk.

I went to a concert when DD was 2 weeks old, I'd bought the tickets before I was even pregnant. I was out for all of 4 hours I think and she was left in the capable hands of her dad and my mum.

Overnight, she was 16 months. We received tickets as a Christmas gift and she went on a sleep over to my mums.

LO is 4 months old. 1st time was at 3 weeks for the evening so me and partner could have a date night. We do this once a month now.

First overnight was at 3 months old, and will be doing another night away in a couple of months

A couple of hours leaving him with DH at a about 8 weeks, a full day leaving him with DH again at 8.5 months when I went back to work, a full day away from both parents when he started Nursery at 9.5 months.
First evening with us both out looked after by my DM a couple of months I think. First overnight I was away around 13 months (work trip) - took the opportunity to night wean, saved my sanity as DH could then alternate nights.
DS was ebf, never took a bottle even when I went back to work.
People do what feels right for them.

When my baby was a few days old to go watch my oldest daughter in her first school play and it was a few hours. was very upset not for leaving my baby with my mum but because my kids father rather spent time with his mates than see our daughter in her play..

With my oldest though think about a few months old though rarely went out anyway plus didn’t have many people offering to babysit for me anyway so it was kinda me and my daughter v the world kinda thing
And it pretty much fked her up, she would hide behind me if anyone so much as looked at her.
But if folk are offering to babysit your kids to give you some me time you’d be a fool not to take it, whether baby is a week or a month old..

At a week old with DM for about 45mins (he was asleep), just went to tesco with DH to get out of the house for fresh air/a walk!

For a few hours maybe 8ish months (he was ebf so when he could have solids and water), for the evening at around 1, and overnight with DH (just the once) at about 18m.

I'd love to go away for the night/weekend with DH but he still doesnt sleep through the night at 2.

For a few hours with my husband, about a week old.

Overnight (also with husband) about 5 months old.

Leaving them with their dad really doesn’t count lol. We left OUR (not just mine!) son when he was 4 months old for an overnight at my sisters. I wrote a big list of what to do with him lol. She appreciated it I cant even remember with my 2nd, I think he was around 6 months as its harder to get people to have 2 of them at once

Left my Dd at about 6 months for a couple of hours with grandparents whilst we went for a meal, wasn't possible before that as she was ebf and refused a bottle so had to wait until she was weaning. She's 10 months now and I'm back at work next week so it'll be the longest I've left her. Can't see me leaving her overnight for a long time yet, she still feeds in the night.

When she was 4 days old, for 3 hours, because she had an infection and had to stay in hospital, but I had to be at home to meet the social workers. It was horrible.

Coleworld when the hospital won't release your DC until they've got the OK from the SW, and the SW wants to see inside your flat, and wants you to be there. Thanks so much for bringing all that back to me.

@Heartofglass12345 That was the question though The first time DC was left by both of us was his nursery settling days at about 13 or 14 months I think. He was fine, I spent the first few weeks crying in the hallway

DH also regularly takes him out on the weekends without me since the hospital admission, but we don't go out and leave him with anyone unless we go to work. We just don't want to as he is happiest with us (unless there's a chance of biscuits elsewhere).

Mine was 5 months old. Me and DH went on a short break abroad for 4 nights. He was with my mum so I knew he was perfectly fine. (She's helped me from day one so he was completely fine with her).