One child families cause kids that don't share

[Keepdlingwhatyourgutsays]

I've read a lot of posts where people say one child families are lonely they don't share and bla bla bla
Is this true? In my experience it's not and my small one doesn't seem to care or desperately want another sibling.
In fact my child seems to love having people over and sharing because it's a novelty. Toys she often plays with on her own or with her parents she now gets to enjoy with another child.
I've been thinking a lot about another one but the cons seem to outway the pros for me.
How are your single children do they have any issues like not sharing or desperately wanting another sibling. What age did these things start? 😀

I think they're talking rubbish, it all depends how you bring them up! Mine was always in the company of someone else's children when she was growing up because I worked from home so people thought I ahd all the time to look after their kids and as a result she was taught to share, as well as to play by herself.
She's older now and see the benefits of being an only child. SHe has from time to time wanted a sibling but really isn't bothered as she has friends. I do worry it'll be harder for her to deal with us dying though. (3 of us dealing with our father's tricky problem property abroad is time consuming)

YEs that's a worry her being left alone. I hope she'll have an aunt left and hopefully she'll have cousins. I'm hoping she'll treasure her cousins and friends because she doesn't have siblings. I don't know I'll have to see as she gets older

My dd is 9 and she shares perfectly well. She has lots of friends, does plenty of extracurricular and is a very happy confident child.

She would love a sibling but only because she loves babies, she has baby cousins that she adores. I'm not sure she would actually like the reality of a sibling. She had an imaginary sister for a year or so when she was 4/5. Her name was Julietta and she was a 2 year old gymnast.

In any case a sibling won't happen as she has a disability that is probably genetic and with no diagnosis the unknowns are a step too far for me and her dad.

Some kids will share and some won't. The fact that some have siblings is irrelevant.

I know a family whose kids don't have to share as they buy 3 of everything.
I also know one 6 year old only child who loves to share.

I'm sorry to hear that. How brilliant that she happy and confident.
Mine would like a baby but babies grow and I don't think she'd really like the reality either.
I'm aware not all children are like this but I just see siblings fight, obviously not all the time.
I personally like the fact she can go to school be around children but come home to just her but then I do look at say Jamie Oliver or the radfords and think I would absolutely love a house full.

That's an interesting idea to get one of everything. I wonder what happens at school where's theirs only one. 😀 We had to share things but then did have our own bikes. But I'm sure there were things where there was only one thing and we had to take it in turns

That is such nonsense. My DD, 6, is currently still an only child and has much more empathy, and plays nicely and is able to share with other (nice) children much more than many of her peers who have siblings. I think the extra 1-on-1 time with us and not ever having to fight for/defend her toys/attention quota really helped and was a very positive experience, despite longing for a second child.

However, I don’t think it has anything to do with sibling numbers, more to do with upbringing, parental input, parental empathy levels/personality and the child’s default personality all combined.

My 6yo shares just fine - be it toys, stickers, sweets. He has not once asked for a sibling. He likes school and playing with his friends after school, he likes visiting friends' houses and having friends over to ours. But he also likes being home and having quiet time just for himself.

Selfish children/adults are so regardless of how many siblings they have. My elder sibling: selfish as they come.

The kids who all got a toy each were right nightmares in the nursery and reception at school. Lucky me got to deal with all 3 as a ta.
The smallest was the worst - would put a toy down and do something else and demand no one else play with it as it was "his". And used to try taking stuff home too, the parents did him no favours as they wanted to let him take it. They did offer to pay but still .
Pleased to say that they all grew out of it by year 1 or 2

I think it really depends on the child and how they're bought up. My son who's 5 went to play at a friends (only child) after school and when I collected my son the other child wasn't very good at sharing it considering others. But it could have been because it was late or he was hungry!

I am an only child (now an adult) & have never had a problem sharing. I also have no time for the frequently churned out view that only children are inevitably spoiled & brattish.
However my parents placed all their expectations on me & clearly felt that I failed to deliver.
& to be honest we didn't have a great relationship when I got to adolescence & beyond.
I get really fed up with other people's pre conceptions of only children..

DS is 4 and an only child, he shares everything with everyone. His cousin also 4 and an only child doesn't share anything. I think it's purely down to upbringing.

DS would love an older brother, that's about as far as he gets for wanting a sibling. He has 10 cousins and 9 are older than him. 4 of those are boys who he adores and I hope they will always have a good relationship.

Ladywillpower that's awful.
I really hope she does well I'll encourage and support but she achieves what she does and I achieve what I do. And I'll always love her. For me if she has a job sticks at it doesn't break the law is kind to the people around her I'll be happy.

I'm an only child and have had two children. I hated being an only child and would have given anything for a sibling. Now I'm an adult I can see the pros of being the only one. My parents aren't rich and I would have had a lot fewer material things if they'd have had another one to buy for too. On the other hand now I'm an adult the responsibility of being the only one has really hit home. It's not easy but I chose to have more than one because of my longing for a sibling. I don't think there's a right or wrong, every family needs to do what's right for their family.

I said when she was younger that she needs a bigger sibling but I couldn't magic that one.

Oops, I forgot the original question

I have never had problems sharing, that theory is a load of rubbish. And I'm so so close to my parents. Sometimes I worry I'm too close to them because I'd feel guilty if I moved away being their only one.

An only child going on to have more. Where in a child surrounded whose chosen to have one

In fact I'm the first in my to family to only have one

That made no sense. I meant where as I'm a child who had siblings and I've chosen to have one so far

I think only children are just as likely or not to share as children with siblings.

We have a family friend only child visit often. He’s 7. Our house has 4 siblings. I do find he’s a bit different about things. Not better or worse, just there are certain things he doesn’t understand maybe. He gets quite upset when mine squabble, and asks me over and over why they do it. He constantly addresses the adult in the room in a way kids with siblings don’t. Hard to explain but instead of asking my son why he’s doing whatever he calls me and asks why my son is doing whatever. I think it’s because he gets so much one on one with his parents and they (have time to) discuss and explain everything to him. He thinks he’s part of the parents group rather than the child group.
He’s a wonderful kid anyway, and a good advertisement for only children😅

My experience is that only children are better at sharing. Perhaps less of a fight for resources or just focussed/good parenting.

Keepdlingwhatyourgutsays My dh has siblings and although he agreed with me that we'd have two he keeps telling me that having siblings really isn't always this 'best friend for life' fantasy that I have in my head.

DS is an only - he's 2. A few weeks ago at playgroup, a slightly older child was gathering a big heap of toys together. DS went and picked one up from the heap. The other child wailed - and DS, quite unprompted, handed the toy back. It's his nature, plus we (I, mainly) spend lots of time teaching him about turn-taking and sharing and so on.

Of course he's only very little and may well go through a hording phase of his own - indeed, I fully expect him to! But that won't be due to a lack of siblings - the little girl who was collecting all the toys is one of three. They're all individual little people, and there are so many factors that influence them beyond having siblings.

Utter rubbish. I'm an only child and I have always been happy to share. My son is 3 and will be an only child and I am teaching him to share. It's how you bring them up that counts.

FEel much better now. Thanks all