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Parenting

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Original poster

Would you let your parents take your 3 year old on holiday.

66 replies

LandSmum · 02/05/2007 22:43

My partner and I get on excellently with my parents and they are brilliant with our 2 dd's. DD1 has just turned 3 and my parents have asked if they could take her on holiday with them this year to give us a rest - DD2 is only 11 weeks and breastfeeding so impossible for them to take her too.
I trust them completely and know that she would be as well looked after with them as she is at home but I am in a complete dilemma as to wether to allow her to go or not (they are paying by the way). I think its partly selfish of me because I know how much I would miss her, she would obviously miss us but she would have so much fun and she is really close to my parents that I dont think it would bother her that much.

What would you do?

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hairymclary · 02/05/2007 22:44

absolutely I would

Dimpled · 02/05/2007 22:45

no I wouldn't

Original poster

LandSmum · 02/05/2007 22:46

Why not Dimpled?

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choosyfloosy · 02/05/2007 22:47

As usual with these things, i would, but would ruin the break by worrying throughout!

I have to say I would prefer it in our case if ds stayed at home so he had familiar surroundings while we went away. But perhaps diff since we only have one.

tortoise · 02/05/2007 22:47

I don't think i would,no.
For me at 3yrs old my DD1 would miss me too much.(And i would miss her!)

marymoocow · 02/05/2007 22:47

I'd love my my parents/parents in law to have my ds 3 for just the day, never mind a whole week. (didn't mean that to sound as if you were ungrateful)
I would think that only you can really decide, but as long as you think she will enjoy herself, and that you trust them with her then you should agree.
Think of all that lovely 1:1 time you can have with dd2, like you did when your first dd was born. Look at the positives rather than negatives. Most of all make sure that you enjoy the week as much as she (and your parents) most certainly will

MuminBrum · 02/05/2007 22:47

How long is the planned holiday, and how far away would they be?

FrayedKnot · 02/05/2007 22:48

I would prefer to all go away together, then perhaps you can get a break as there will be several pairs of hands to take DD2 out so you can have a kip etc.

I would not leave DS (3) with anyone for more than a night or two, I would miss him too much, so that would be my suggestion.

Whoooosh · 02/05/2007 22:48

Absolutely!
You would get a break,she would love it and you would have a fab time when she gets back.

Am as my father and step mother wouldn't even have dd for an hour-not that I would really want them to but that's a whole new thread.

Let her go-you both wil enjoy it I am sure.

ChasingSquirrels · 02/05/2007 22:49

I would, my mum has looked after my ds1 from when he was 7mo to 3.5y (when i went on mat leave witg ds2) and after that we saw them at least 3 times a week. I love my mum to bits and trust her totally with my ds. I wouldn't want them to go for too long (cos I wouldn miss him) but would be happy with a week.
I wouldn't even consider the thought of the inlaws taking him.

Hillls · 02/05/2007 22:50

Yes I would.

JodieG1 · 02/05/2007 22:51

I wouldn't and I trust my parents wholly. They visit daily during the week and ds1 (who is 3) knows them very well. He would miss me and dh though and I think he's too young to go away without us. I am very close to my parents.

JodieG1 · 02/05/2007 22:52

And of course we would miss him.

Dimpled · 02/05/2007 22:52

I would worry a lot and I know there are a lot of things that only I 'get' about my DD (4) - she is not very good at communcaiting if she is upset or doesn't like something.

My parents are great with them but at this age I would be tempted to do sleep overs and / or day trips - you will still get the break but without the seperation.

I get a knot in my stomach thinking about it - I guess I know it is just not for us - yet.

TinyGang · 02/05/2007 22:53

Depends on how long, how far and the child of course being ok with it.

Atm mine are 5 and 8.

A few nights would be ok but longer than that and the little ones wouldn't be happy I suspect.

Older dd would probably be ok with longer;
maybe up to a week.

I haven't left them for longer than 2 nights so far though and even that was a bit of a one off. They do have occasional sleepovers of one night at gp's though.

hairymclary · 02/05/2007 22:54

wow, surprised at the amount of no's. ds is only 2 and I'd let my parents take him for a week.
if you don't think it'd bother dd that much then let her go, it'll give you a nice break and you get to spend more time with dd2

SNOWBall4girlz · 02/05/2007 22:54

yes I would and have
my mum in law has taken my dd2 and her cousin for a week twice now to wales and it is fab
more time with my other dd' s she had a great time and it was lovely when she came home
I agree think about the time with you and dp with your new baby xx

ChasingSquirrels · 02/05/2007 22:54

i suppose therein lies the difference, i know that my mum 'gets' everything about ds1, in the same way that i know that dh doesn't. i wouldn't be overly happy about dh taking him away for a week (not that it would happen) just cos of the 'getting' issue.

Original poster

LandSmum · 02/05/2007 22:54

They are planning to go to a family resort in Spain I think - nothing definate yet. They said 10 days but I said no way, we will think about a week but def no more.
My mum has looked after her since she was 5 1/2 months when I went back to work til she was 2 and 10months when I stopped for mat leave. They still keep her overnight once or twice a weeks on most weeks - her choice to go and stay - she always ask to go there (spoiled rotten while she's there!)

I know what you mean on the inlaw front - mine have looked after her for 2 hours for me to attend a funeral and never since. Again another thread completely!!

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handlemecarefully · 02/05/2007 22:55

No I wouldn't because I would completely irrationally worry the whole time....but if you are more sensible and sorted than me - go for it

Original poster

LandSmum · 02/05/2007 22:58

She is an excellent communicator and says exactly what she wants - and my parents totally 'get' her at all times. Not sure if i'd let dp take her for a week on his own though - he has a tendency to feed himself and forget to feed her 'cos she doesnt ask for anything' - neither would I if I was 3 eyars old and totally engrossed in play! lol

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JodieG1 · 02/05/2007 22:58

My parents have been very much involved with dc's since they were born and have stayed over a few times but we are all very comfortable in each other's company. I still wouldn't want them taking them away yet though and I'm sure the dc's would miss us too.

Original poster

LandSmum · 02/05/2007 22:59

Also we can't afford to go along too - bought a new house last year and still trying to get it how we want it.

OP posts:

Washersaurus · 02/05/2007 22:59

No way, I wouldn't want to be away from my DS (nearly 2) for longer than a day. I don't think my opinion will change on this until he is old enough to make the decision for himself....call me irrational if you like...

ChasingSquirrels · 02/05/2007 23:01

who makes the decision on when he is old enough to make the decision - you or him?
I think, as with anything, you have to make the choice YOU are happy with - some of us say yes, some say no - but at the end of the day we aren't you.

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