"How to talk so kdis will listenand listen so kids will talk" - anyone want to go trhough this book?

[Porcupine]

and see hwat we think of it?

Its wuite heavy reading( not intellectually) just very close set type and lots of americna egs
But i reckon we cna do it.

yes you haev to say what they did and what it shows about them when you praise them
" you didnt eat the cake and you love it - that shows borderline anorexia" kidn of thing

oh grr no time nwo
dh aroudn too
will post later

Am going to live near dhs parents then. Will become their new best friend. They'll say, 'oi dil mouse in fine shoes, this woman's moved into the hundredhouse, and you should hear how she talks to her children.'

Question for later - when we're describing this amazing thing they've done and summing it up in one word, are we then also saying how this makes us feel? Like we did when we stated the problem and then said how that problem made us feel?
there's an awful lot of talking in this. When do we start the listening?

ohg od you do ask a lto of qs
go and gte the book!

look

OK - so more info needed for them on the consequences of leaving stuff on the floor. Thanks littlemouse. I think DS is definitely more susceptible to all this than DD - she's just getting too wise to things. Must go back and re-read the book.

Love the pic and its even got snow for ds1 to shovel. Perfect.

look 100 jackei is taking it seriously

i have orederd the teenage one

ooh how intersting
elt us knwo how it differs

.

The critters are bigger, littlemouse!

Seriously, haven't read the teen one, didn't even know they had Done a teen one.

I read How to Listen years ago and revisted it for refresher courses to brush up on my skills. Thanks for starting this thread, it has brought it flooding back and given me chuckles along the way

Ime, don't expect one method to work everytime - and find lingo that is 'your own' or it can sound rather false.

The describing thing isn't meant to be sarcasm btw, it is supposed to be getting away from the 'it's good' by being specific about what you like, eg, 'I love the way you used red for the sunset, it makes the sun look on fire!'

Sometimes when our dcs are being very challenging it is hard to find even one thing that is praiseworthy in the midst of what seems like disaster eg 'I see you tried to clean up the spilt egg when it broke' rather than 'it was a mess to begin and all you did was spread it further'. IYKWIM?

Hey love this thread.
Have spent 3 days reading it. Love your RL examples, youse havin so much success I thought I'd give it a try:
Delores: so son, I took the babies dolly off you cause she was still playing with it and now she's cryin. You feel angry right?
3yr old: Go away

Maybes I need to get the actual book, yeh?

hmm think so
let me brign int eh REAL expert
ahindredtimes

am having great fun reading this thread

have ordered book

however have problem

dd barely speaks sulky little feck

what do I do now? when there is nothing to ahh um bleeding well listen to?

hmm i wodner i f HTT is too advaced
start a new thread descibign a typicla problem

ok then roll up roll up come find an alternative to the patented shed-threatening technique

I have just saved this into my favourites. Some of these conversations are inspired (lunatic, but inspired)

Loving the thread. Am on popyscal's thread aswell - am going to print off her summaries of the chapters and stick them to fridge.

marking thread as its just taken me ages to find the right one but its sooo long

I have never heard of this book at all, never read it etc... But this thread makes for very hilarious reading and am thinking of getting the book

i am bumping this up...eventually found it
off to peruse until i find my own copy

LOl
what wisdom was on this thread

Yes indeedy

Message withdrawn