Clingy baby

[ChipShopGherkin]

Hi everyone

My little one is currently 3 weeks old, I'm ebf but he is so clingy to me. Some times he won't even sit with his dad without screaming for me and I can't leave him as he just cries hysterically.

He won't sleep in his crib during the night either, but is willing to sleep on his playmat during the day. Will this improve as he gets older? Or am I damning myself by breastfeeding?

Congratulations on the birth of your new baby!

From your DS's perspective he would much prefer to be inside you right now, you are all he has ever known (in sure you've read about the fourth trimester). As it happens our bodies just can't cope with keeping babies in for any longer than 42ish weeks, so out they pop (hahaha pop...DD totally did not pop) still not quite ready for the world around them.

He'll ease into it, there will be periods he clings to you, and probably periods (as a toddler) he clings to someone else, he's acting entirely on instinct at the moment, and he knows you're the source of his comfort and food.

The key things are to get as much rest as you can so take it as easy as you are able to, and settle into your new relationship with him. I'm not one for lying in bed with your baby for weeks on end (though it works for many, I was all about the 'get up and go' post partum). But you'll settle into a nice little routine, and as he gets more aware, and starts to engage more with what's going on around him, he'll find other people more interesting.

I agree with pp, it’s all he knows, and despite lack of experience he knows the safest place for him to survive (food, warmth etc) is to be snuggled up next to you. I know it’s totally exhausting, but time really does fly. Enjoy all the snuggles you can.

It will definitely get better as he gets older! The early weeks are hard. Well done for exclusively breastfeeding by the way!
Have you tried letting his Dad take him for walks in the pushchair after he’s had a feed, so you can get a break? Some fresh air and motion may help soothe him so he may not miss Mummy too much.

Hang on in there with the breastfeeding if you can! I found it suddenly became a lot easier at 8 weeks. It felt like my baby was constantly stuck to me in the early weeks and it was quite overwhelming at times. However, the constant feeding built up my milk supply and gradually she would go longer in between feeds and therefore be happier to spend more time with dad.

It's hard to see it while you're in it but it will get easier really soon.

I'd also add that now my baby is 6 months I'm giving her formula and it's a real pain with all the bottle washing and kettle boiling. Once established, breastfeeding was way easier than this formula feeding malarkey. You can do it!

Thank you for all your replies. I'm feeling slightly reassured now that it won't last forever, it's just so draining. I'll get there.

Just hold him. He's only 3 weeks. Mine was literally not put down from birth until about 4 months. She slept once in her moses basket for 20 minutes. Otherwise, she was in our arms or in the wrap all the time. She never even slept alone until she was 4 months old. For the first 6 weeks, she wasn't even put down at night. We did it in shifts to sit awake and hold her as it's the only way she'd sleep. She' not clingy at all. She's 4 now and very confident and outgoing.

I know people telling you to enjoy it and it doesn't last sound like they are talking nonsense.

But DS is 1 now, still bf and I all I hear about all day and night is dad dad dad. So yes it will pass, make the most of being everything to little one