Getting back together after domestic violence

[Lilmc]

Hi I was wondering if anyone has had a successful reconciliation with an ex after 1 domestic violence incident.

If so what do social services do? What did they say?

In no way do i want to risk losing my dd but I do want us to be a happy family.

I am doing the freedom programme and only started talking to ex again about being a family again we have both grew up and I feel he has changed.

Will social services allow us to be together again and leave us alone?

There is NO chance of being a 'happy family' with this man. None at all.

There was a child in dc's class whose behaviour was very, very disturbed. Needed 1-1, but completely unable to focus on any of the learning that went on, unable to stay in the classroom half the time. It is unlikely that he will ever be able to lead a normal life. That was the boy who had witnessed his dad kill his mum.

OP, it only takes one incident like the one that has already happened, one incident which is just slightly less lucky, and that could be your dd. Her whole life ruined because of something that could have been prevented.

That is how SS will be thinking. They will have seen children like this, they will know how unrealistic it is to think that "he'd never hurt his dd". Quite possibly the dad I mentioned never meant to hurt his ds. But he has hurt him. Hurt him for life.

You probably still have feelings of love, memories of the good times and hopes for the future. That is all completely understandable and normal.

However, have you yet seen anyone in 4 pages so far say there is hope of reconciliation?

You are very lucky, you know. You had one attack (not lucky about that!), but you took immediate and appropriate action. Well done. Many of us didn't, were paralysed the first time, stayed, partly forgave, were sucked in and lost huge chunks of their life and their children's well-being.

The choice is black and white. Him or your daughter.

If you want your dd to grow up in a happy family the most important thing you can do to ensure that, is keep a violent man out of her home.

He stamped on your head. HE STAMPED ON YOUR HEAD. HE STAMPED ON YOUR HEAD

It’s not like you had a drunken row and he shoved you. He stamped on your fucking head! That’s a really serious level of violence, which could easily have killed you, and he did it less than a month ago. There is no way he has changed from that level of violence to being a fucking angel in one month, and the halo will slip as soon as he thinks he’s got you back again.

Op hasn't come back. I think social services will end up taking her children. She sounds as messed up as I once was. Let's hope no one gets seriously hurt meanwhile.

Get the fuck a million miles away from violence.
I suffered DV and there's no way I'd go near exh again because he was violent and it fuckin HURT
Don't be me don't end up at a&e in the middle of the night, you have a chance so take it because these men never change !

They never change. Even if the violence stops, there will be abuse in other ways.

You will never be a happy family OP, because he is an abuser. He will always be the violent man who attacked you. Your daughter deserves better than to be raised in a violent household.

Shit, zombie thread - sorry everyone