And I mean completely!
We're in a rut, and it's a bad one.
Despite vowing to do things entirely different to how my parents did things, I am exactly the same. And it's having the same effect on my kids as it did on me.
I find myself talking in a slightly high pitched, stressy voice all the time which the kids just tune out and carry on regardless.
I feel crap and useless and end up screeching at them, they screech back, and that's our life.
But I can't stop. I need a different tack but my nerves are frazzled and I'm an anxious wreck.
I'm almost at the point where I feel I can't take them out anymore because they do whatever they like, I get stressed out and it's basically no fun at all.
How can I turn it round.
I know what I need to do but how to I do it - it's basically a whole personality change isn't it? Is that possible?