Nursery Drop Off and Collection with 2 DC

[Latium123]

I think I am going to have a nervous breakdown over the nursery drop off and pick up with my 2 DCs aged 2.5 and 10 months. Any tips for doing this safely and with minimum stress for all concerned? I do have to drive as the trip to work would be too far to walk and take them in the buggy which ideally would be my preferred option and far less stressful. Any tips greatly appreciated. Thanks.

What problems are you encountering at the moment? Perhaps if give us a bit more information we may be able to help

If it's parking please advise so we can nip out for popcorn. .

Ah yes sorry I was a bit light on detail. I think I was mid-nervous breakdown!! No, it is not about parking. I am realistic about that and I certainly don't have any sense of entitlement to a space right outside the nursery. I am happy to park wherever there is space and walk over.

It is more to do with getting them both out of the house and into the car then out of the car and into nursery and the other way round at the end of the day. Because I have two there will always have to be one door open into the road. I try to do it as quickly as possible but with the best will in the world there will always be times when the door is open into the road for seconds at most. Just last week someone wound down their window and started shouting abuse at me while I was trying to secure my DS into the car. At that point I had two options, either carry on and fasten his buckle then shut the door or take him out and shut the door. I took the view that either option would take just as long so I carried on. It really was no more than seconds but because this person had to slow down in the road and wait they wound down the window and started screaming abuse. Now, maybe that says more about them than me but it just added to the stress I already feel about the whole thing.

Then there are the toddler tantrums about getting into the car. Sometimes full on meltdown, throwing herself in the street, al while I am trying to hold her hand to keep her safe and still carrying the baby safely.

The only thing I came up with last night while thinking it through was using a sling for the baby. It will still be difficult to get the toddler in the car that way but at least I will have two available hands and I don't need to worry so much about the baby's safety.

Is baby still in her infant carrier? Lift baby out in carrier, toddler out on road side.

No, the baby is not in infant carrier any more as he is so big. It was marginally easier when he was in the infant carrier.

I know I shouldn't, but he is still rear facing though isn't he?

Yes Sweep both of mine are extended rear facing. Don't worry, it is a particular thing of mine too. It's so important.

I put older ones in the front driver's seat while I secure the baby. (lots of random buttons pressed but at least they are safe and it's a treat so they don't try to escape.

Get baby in then lift older ones out and into their seat and secure.

A sling for the baby is very helpful! I use an ergo (still do and DS2 is a hefty 19mo) as you then have a hand for the bags and a hand for the toddler.

Sympathy - I had 2yo twins and a baby and getting into and out of the car was hellish for about 6 months. I also often pick a further away parking spot for the convenience of the actual getting in and out! So try to be more strategic on that front.

Thanks Miaow that is helpful especially the tough shite to impatient twats. I think I needed that as I was starting to lose perspective. The sandwich thing is good, I think I need to think more about this kind of thing and try to make fun out of it to reduce the pressure. No doubt my toddler picks up on my stress about it all and this probably fuels the tantrums / car seat refusing. If we can make some games and have some fun it should make it easier.

Baby in the car first. They're more compliant and will hopefully sit there waiting. And once baby is in the car you can say to the toddler Look, baby is waiting for you!

We used to bring the baby out by stealth sometimes if we didn't want toddler hovering by the door. So whilst toddler was watching Ben and Holly etc. The baby should be ok in the car for a few minutes, especially if given a toy.

We also used to just haul the toddler into the car without a coat or shoes if necessary. The shoes are easier to wrangle on once they're in the car seat and they sometimes will allow the coat once they twig it's cold outside. If not though just stuff it in the bag. They're in the car and it's Spring and they aren't going to freeze to death.

Once at nursery, what is the parking situation? If it's a secure car park and not on the road, I would leave the 10 month old in the locked car for the 5 min drop off. But you will find people here who would never ever do that. But our car park was so private and I was in and out so quick that it made sense.

I agree with miaow
I get both mine in the youngest DC side. The eldest scoots across and gets into his car seat whilst I'm securing the youngest.
Doors are on child lock, so once he's in he can't get out the door or back past me. So I can see both kids at all times.
Whichever is quickest to secure in their seat, I'd park so that that side is out towards the road so I'm spending the longest time at the door on the pavement side.
As for abusive drivers, just roll your eyes and continue.
As for the tantrums, just bundle them into the car, completely ignore their bad behaviour and tell them you will talk to them once they have calmed down.

Would it help to move one of the seats into the front so they can both be on the passenger side? It's perfectly safe when rearfacing as long as the airbag turns off, but you need a car seat with lower sides so it doesn't obstruct the drivers view. We do this with a Britax Two Way Elite and it works really well

My older child leaves a toy on his car seat so he's always happy to climb in himself and this tends to stop post-nursery strop!

Use 1 door. Unclip eldest child and haul small one out whilst eldest struggles out. Eldest child carries bag (2 years between mine), you carry other bag and wish you hadn't worn heels. Much swearing.

It does get better when they can climb and strap selves in. Although now there lots of: "mummy sibling rival is hitting/squashing/looking at me."