This is an ok punishment right ???

[Bedsheets4knickers]

My ds is 6 . He gets 50p per day for getting himself dressed every morning . He's come home today with a hole in his school shirt and in his trousers . When I asked him how it had happened he said he cut them with scissors . He was very pleased with himself so I'm withholding this weeks pocket money . He's now furious . It's fine isn't it ??? He needs to learn if you on purpose destroy something you replace it ??

Seems apt, the money is needed to buy new clothes and is relatable as it's earnt via the clothes.
Perfectly fine!

Up to you. Sounds reasonable. On the other hand, paying him to get dressed by himself sounds ridiculous!

I'm not sure why you are doubting yourself? It's not a particularly harsh punishment.

I would have been furious if mine had deliberately destroyed clothing.

After all the £2.50 won't cover anywhere near what it's going to cost you to replace the clothes.

Why are you concerned that he's angry?

Im not really just wanted to run it past a few people . Can't believe he's done it tbh . No logic in it at all . It's his own clothes

Perfectly reasonable. My DC did this on two occasions. First time he lost a weeks pocket money and items were replaced. However after deliberately doing it a second time he had to wear the holey clothes until he had saved up enough pocket money to buy a replacement as I refused to give him an advance! He hasn't done it since

Why on earth are you paying a 6 year old to get dressed? Surely that's basic expectations?!

What happens when he demands a pay rise for getting dressed?

You pay your son to get dressed ?

Does a 6 year old need pocket money? What does he spend it on?

£3.50 a week! That's almost £200 a year - might as well give him a Christmas bonus!

Why on earth are you paying him to dress himself? So if you didn't pay him he stays in pj's all day!!!
You're setting yourself up for a fall God help you if he starts chores around house when he's older you'll be bankrupt! Total lunacy IMO

It just makes mornings run more smoothly which makes my day easier .. he spends it on all sorts really . A comic or an app for the iPad . Whatever he chooses really . This weekend he'l be putting it towards new school wear

How do you get him to wash, brush his teeth,
go to bed etc

It seems rather strange to pay a child for the usual activities of daily living

I don't find anything strange about OP paying her child to get dress, we all have our own different ways of parenting.

OP with holding a weeks money is fine, it will teach him not to destroy things in future, ignore the horrible comments

at his being paid to dress himself! What would happen if he wasn't paid, you'd dress him like a toddler?

I don't think it's strange . He's nearly self sufficient . Has a shower every evening , pours his own cereal . He just mucks about in the mornings . It's just an incentive to get us all out the door on time with less shouting . Wasn't really about why he got pocket money . ??

I don't think it's reasonable tbh. He HAS got dressed himself, and will continue to do so, I'm not sure how removing that reward will help. Assuming he gets the reward because he has had trouble dressing himself in the past I would expect a regression with the removal of his incentive. Perhaps just removal of tv privilege if you feel the need to punish. I personally wouldn't punish my 6yo for that anyway, kids very easily do silly things without realising the consequences. While he obviously knows right from wrong where scissors are concerned won't have fully understood the implications of the action.

You paying him to get dressed
He has got dressed
So you can't not pay him
You had a deal with him

You need to think of another consequence for cutting his clothes. Very odd though.
Did he say why he did it ?

I pay my kids to get dressed sometimes as they can be little shites! Although it is more under the ruse of 'well done you got dressed and ready for school without a fuss or arguing with DB, that deserves a gold star'. Gold stars are worth 10p each in this house so technically I sometimes pay them to get ready.

It's just chores/good behaviour for pocket money surely?? My 7year old dusted the skirting boards throughout the house with his new socks of his own accord this weekend....best 10p I've ever spent

I give my daughter pasta for her reward jar for doing things.... 1 bit for doing things first time she is asked, 2 for doing things off her own back. Once it's full she choose her reward (toy, day out etc) similar principle. Not particularly different to the 50p. One thing about the reward jar, is that I never remove for bad behaviour etc. It's about positive parenting.

I don't disagree like others with your 50p payment for dressing nor the withholding for the damage. Parenting is hard enough, the little wins make the day more bearable. We all do things differently.

I just have an expectation that my kids will get dressed for the day. Just like I do and all the people they know do. Why are they such a special case they need financial reward to do so ?

No drama. No rewards required.

I also think this is the wrong message, it's illogical to pay for getting dressed and withhold for bad behaviour. Logically he should only not be psid if he does not get dressed. What will you do tomorrow if he doesn't get dressed?

I'd have withdrawn screen privileges or whatever.

I also think paying uour son to get dressed is storing problems for the future. Kids want to dress themselves at this age, we shouldn't have to pay them for it.

I wouldn't take his money off of him because he has done what needs to be done to earn it. I wouldn't even go mad about the clothes tbh, he's six they do stupid things and don't think through the consequences. I'd probably just speak to him and tell him not to do it again and warn him there would be consequences if he did. Can his clothes be repaired?

I better hide this from 8 year old he moans that he has to empty the dishwasher for free!

I agree with bluntness. You cannot take back rewards that have previously been earned for good behaviour.

Now, I understand that consequences should normally be logical, however, in this case I wouldn't make him pay out of his 'getting dressed' money. Maybe what I would do is ask him to do some age appropriate jobs as a consequence, assign a monetary value to each one and then use this 'money' to pay for the uniform?