How soon after the birth did you go on a night out? Am I crazy to plan one a month after the due date?

[ArialAnna]

I really wanted to buy my husband tickets to The Chambers of Flavour for Christmas. I'm pregnant with our first and due on 14th January. Ideally I wanted to get us tickets for just after Christmas, but the next batch just came on sale and the only options were too close to the due date, or afterwards. So I've booked the latest available (for 17th Feb), but now I'm wondering if that's a bit bonkers? Are we likely to be able to leave the baby at that stage with a babysitter for the evening? (probably my mum or my sister). I guess it depends on how we go with feeding and if the baby will happily take a bottle of expressed milk (planning to breastfeed but obviously have no idea at this stage how well that'll go!!) I guess it doesn't really matter, as worse case scenario is my husband takes someone else or we sell the tickets. But I just wanted to get some idea of how realistic it was. Guess I'm a bit worried about my husband's family's reaction (we'll be a their house for Christmas this year). My MIL already thinks we're crazy for booking a weekend away in early December (by train, no flying), so god knows what she'll make of this!

Within three days I was at a theatre backstage helping with DD1 concerts. Very easy birth and she was in NICU. However, I wouldn't have chosen to do that. Breastfed very easy, but none of mine were able to take a bottle.

Not sure about evenings but I was back at work full time at 6 weeks after DC1 after an EMCS. Everyone is different. I knew that I had to be back at work (financial reasons) so back I went.

went clubbing when DD was 9 days old had a great time.

First, no way I could of. Second baby, definitely. My recovery was rough after my first and he had colic / reflux, and fed constantly. Second baby was completely different. I had no complications after birth and he was a dream sleeper and breast feeder.

Personally I'd buy the tickets and buy some tickets in the next lot that come out, and sell the ones you don't need (whether it's the first ones or the second ones). Perhaps you could line someone up as stand by in advance for them?

I left mine at 4 weeks. I bfed before I went and when I got back.

It was fine.

I'd be inclined to disagree about the post about bottle fed breast feeders. Both of mine had to have expressed milk in bottles, at the advice from mws before they were three weeks old (for different medical reasons). There are challenges of course, and you do need to ensure that you allow cluster feeding to keep your supply going, and you do need to limit the amount of bottles but it can be done. I wasn't an extended breast feeder by any stretch, but I combi fed my eldest for 5 months and returned to ebf (bar the odd bottle for babysitting / car journey) for 6mths, after our initial need to express with my second. I'm not aware that my experience was unusual. You just need the right support from mws, breastfeeding specialists and / or hvs.

Think ds was about 4 weeks when I first went out , few hours to the local pub for a good friends birthday, I would probably have gone before had there been a specific event to thought just for a few hours . He was asleep . he was bottle fed which I guess made it much easier . Didn't feel guilty or anything like some people seem to think you should . I was also recovering from c section.

You will have to see nearer the time though , you could get 100 different answers on here and they will literally be irrelevant it depends how you feel at the time . You could go two weeks overdue / be recovering from the birth/ struggling to feed / exhausted / etc etc etc etc

Clearly a monster here! I went out to a local theatre to see Dara O'Briain when dc3 was two days old. No issues and I only had a small twinge of guilt!

Like others have said, hard to predict. Depends on how the baby is, whether he/she will take a bottle whilst you are out/ settle without you and also how you are, whether you want to leave the baby or are just too knackered to face leaving the house at night time!
With my first it was a few months before I went out.
I went out sooner with the second.
Both were bf exlusively to start, moving onto mixed feeding. Both were fine being bottle and bf, no issues going between the two.

I could have emotionally but I got an infection that had me doubled over in pain at that point so couldn't have physically gone. Book tickets and see how you feel.

I had a c section and was breast feeding and my first night out was 5 weeks. It was totally what I needed I got very drunk snd had a brilliant time.

I agree with Chattycat we gave both boys a bottle of expressed milk early on (about 6 weeks) so they never got to a stage where they would not accept the bottle. This made life very easy and I expressed and froze it with never a problem ebf until weaning.
Practically everyone I know does this with their second child and Ive never met anyone in real life who has experienced nipple confusion. I have however met people who tried to introduce a bottle later and baby point blank refused to take it. Understandable as silicone is nowhere near as nice and comforting as the real thing.

Both ours cluster fed also in the first few weeks but it maybe you get a baby that settles in the evening so keep the tickets and see how you feel on the day. Dont even plan the week or day before as who knows what type of night you might have had. Just have a standbye ready to go with your dh if you are not upto it!

If breast feeding doesnt work out for you and the birth goes smoothly I imagine you'll be well able to go as anyone can have the baby! My sil and bil took it in turns to do the night feeds with both theirs and she was out after a few weeks.

See it as a possible perk if you feel like it, but don't give yourself a hard time if you don't.

If things all go swimmingly and you're able to go, it'll be a lovely thing for you and your husband to do together and a nice thing to look forward to. If you can't manage it or the idea fills you with dread when the time comes, no biggy.

we gave both boys a bottle of expressed milk early on (about 6 weeks) so they never got to a stage where they would not accept the bottle.

Oh if only it were that easy!

Another bottle refuser here. I still went out though, just between feeds.

My first had a bottle at birth, as I was unwell but within a week she was refusing it. Would only have the breast. Breast milk in a bottle was a no too!

I completely disagree with not giving a bottle for 6 weeks. I did this with ds and he never took a.bottle (took.a cup in the end at 4 months). Dd had 1 bottle.a day from 10.days they are much more likely to take it if you start younger IMO.

I went out for 3 hr about 6 weeks after birth.
Mine was and still is I'm a saggy titted hippy breast fed but luckily accepted expressed after a month or so once a day.
I had biopsies etc before then meaning I knew she could be left.

Having said that I was knackered and kept checking my phone.

After about 6 months I wanted to go out more but she got stroppy about that! Oh well daddy stayed in and I went out.

Though that's a major point - even lovely even tempered babies like mine can be funny about being away from mum AND dad during sleepy time. I had to train mine (kindly) by grandma helping with nap time after huge meltdown when dh and I went to church for a pre baptism evening class! Wild times! Now she is happy with gran ... age 2+. Phew.

Oh and as an nct hippy ... it is 100% untrue that 'virtually no' babies take the odd bottle of expressed at 4 weeks without problems.

I was so scared and guilty in the run up to my biopsies. Baby was bf with the odd (as in twice a week) expressed bottle rill 6 months, still bf now at 2+ years.
Ran the local bf cafe, at least 1/2 chose to try occasional expressed milk between 4-8 weeks for various reasons (including cultural - some with strong bf traditions just don't believe or fear nipple confusion and somehow it doesn't happen!). Ok they were in a supportive group but all continued to bf till 6 months at least. Several beyond.
Obviously you need to build supply and I'm talking back up/occasional expressed feeds. But still.

I went on my first night out when ds was 3 weeks old. Before I went out, I'd arranged for dh to pick me up at 11 but actually once I was out, I decided to stay out because it was so nice to be out with friends. My only problem was I struggled to find something that fit.

Both of my babies have been in NICU and needed tube feeding (currently sitting in NICU with my prem baby trying to gradually introduce breastfeeding), so I'm not some sort of crazy nipple only purist. But I have read and talked a lot about this and I think you have to be very lucky indeed to have a combination of established supply, easy expressing and bottle accepting breastfed baby at 4 weeks. 6 weeks is a different matter and OP's baby may well be 6 weeks. Or 2 weeks. It'd be optimistic to assume that giving a bottle of expressed milk will be straightforward.

Please don't put yourself under that kind of stress! Trying to make sure you can leave your baby at 4 weeks (or 2) has a significant chance of being stressful and a reasonable chance of being impossible!

The last thing I would have wanted to do with my 4 week old would be to leave her/him to go out. You can't explain to 3 them you'll be back for one. My second baby used to get upset if I left the room. I can't imagine what she would have been like if I'd gone off for hours

I can't see the problem if you feel well enough. Please don't listen to what others tell u to feel or do. Do what's right for your and your child. I felt great afternoon both of mine but then I worked out all through my pregnancies and finished my work up later on so I bounced back straight after. Some people done. Each to their own. Wait and see.

Couldn't have done it.

I went to see Bon Jovi when my DD2 was 3 weeks, post c section! I lived very close to the venue and I have to admit I didn't stay for the whole concert. I left her with my DH and was back in time for a feed. Depends how far you live away and if it is far, if she will take a bottle.