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Parenting

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Original poster

Does anyone else not like being a mum sometimes???

36 replies

Jo26 · 08/02/2007 15:04

I have 2 girls, one is 5 and one 2y7m. My 5yo started school in September, which was a releif to begin with. I thought it would give me some quality time with my youngest and we could go swimming, playgroups, like I used to with my oldest...but no! My 2y7mo is a nightmare She is so demanding and has headbanging temper tantrums, doesn't seem to listen to a single thing I say and I'm constantly exhausted. I do forget how old she is sometimes as she is very forward. She's been in a potty trained and sleeping in a bed (when she decides to go to bed that is) for 6 months.
I just have no energy. I'm scard to take her to toddler group because she constantly fights with other children. I find myself wishing I hadn't had her. I cry alot and just miss what freedom felt like (and lye ins). My oldest doesn't take a blind bit of notice of me crying on the kitchen floor as its quite common. But then my 2y7mo comes over, hugs me and says she loves me.
Just don't know how to get myself out of this hole.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

MamaCampbellBlack · 08/02/2007 15:07

oh JO

are you a single parent? If not, can your DP/DH help out a bit more to give you some time on your own?

2.7 is a hard age, my DS is very demanding, very different to his big sister.

Are you a SAHM?

Sounds like you need some time to yourself

Flumpybumpy · 08/02/2007 15:08

I'm in the same hole with DD (3.5). It can be really hard sometimes, I know how you feel.

The only thing that keeps me from completely losing it to think about her funny side. I have said this a lot on here on other threads, her knock knock jokes are rubbish but I find them funny, she finds herself hysterical and laughs so hard I can't help joining in.

When she is in full on tantrum rage and I am a blubbing mess in the corner, I try very hard to bring these images into my head and regain some composure.

She won't be little for long, and you will find yourself missing the days when she looked so tiny in her big bed and angelic when asleep.

Well, that's what I do to help me out, hope you find something to get you through too!!

FB x

Flumpybumpy · 08/02/2007 15:10

Just read that back and it sounded a bit liek preaching, I wasn't trying to, just not very good at saying what I want to say typed out - if that makes sense

FB x

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Original poster

Jo26 · 08/02/2007 15:17

I am married and I wonder how he puts up with me sometimes. He has to put up with me being an emotional wrek and my daughter being a nightmare too.
He works long hours but does alot when he can. I can leave the kids with him at anytime, he never complains. He quite often says I should go out and have soem time to myself but to be honest by the time he gets home form work I'm exhausted and I don't want to leave the sofa let alone the house.

OP posts:

Original poster

Jo26 · 08/02/2007 15:18

Flumpybumpy thank you for the advice, I'll try that next time my 2yo is having a rant

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MamaCampbellBlack · 08/02/2007 15:18

do you come on here a lot? You may find it a lifeline

wurlywurly · 08/02/2007 15:19

everyday, and then they do something lovely (like go to bed) and i realise that i couldnt be without them.

Original poster

Jo26 · 08/02/2007 15:24

This is my first day on here. I was searching for something else and came across it. I think i'll be a regular from now on. Thank you all for the advice.
Yeah I do find myself feeling very guilty and missing them terribly if we go out for the eveninig and leave the girls with my parents.
Sorry MamaCampellBlack I'm not sure what SAHM means?

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wurlywurly · 08/02/2007 15:27

Stay at home mum

we really should have a thread of all the abbreviations,

doratheexplorer2 · 08/02/2007 15:33

I was a SAHM to my for 3 years after my ds1 was born. I wouldn't have dreamed of going to work as I always thought that I didn't want anyone else bringing up my kids. Last year we hit financial hardship (or rather couldn't keep afloat on one salary anymore!) and I went back part time while ds1 is at preschool and dd2 at nursery. It's only a few mornings a week but I'm loving it. It feels so great to be back among adults talking about adult things! It has also made me appreciate much more the time that I do have with them and more able to cope when they are a handful!! I still miss the real freedom of being totally single sometimes though but not often.

Original poster

Jo26 · 08/02/2007 15:34

yeah I agree.
No I work 5 mornings a week. Only 9-1 and my mum has my youngest but I don't think she helps matters sometimes to be honest.
Last week when my youngest was having a tantrum my mum actually calmed her down by offering her jelly babies!!!
My mum is quite old fashioned and she thinks that her way is right and anyone who disagrees has an argument on their hands. Its all a mess really.
I've just put my D's name down at a pre-school but they have no places til september

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doratheexplorer2 · 08/02/2007 15:34

If I was you I'd at least try and muster the energy to go out and have some time to yourself, you'll be amazed at the effect I'm sure!

Original poster

Jo26 · 08/02/2007 15:38

I am moaning on aren't I?
I work in a call cantre so although I am in adult company most days, it mostly envolves people complaining about the cost of their energy bills!

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Original poster

Jo26 · 08/02/2007 15:41

I think I will try and get an hour a week to myself thanks doratheexplorer2.
I have just started my daughter on omega3 syrup too, not sure if it'll help but I'll try anything at the moment

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doratheexplorer2 · 08/02/2007 15:43

Venting your moans is what we're here for!! God, the call centre thing hardly sounds like a bundle of laughs either! Could you go out with a friend for an evening? DD2 is also 2 and a handful, I can sympathise. Shame about the preschool being full, could you look around for another suitable one perhaps? Have a friend whose ds1 was a nightmare but as soon as he started PS was a LOT better, guess it gives them some other stimulation and also other adults that they can't get to so easily!

motherinferior · 08/02/2007 15:44

Jo, you sound very sad.

If I'm honest, it totally varies how much I enjoy being a mum. Some days I really don't.

doratheexplorer2 · 08/02/2007 15:46

I also think adequate sleep and a good diet are major factors in behaviour probs ie they need both!! I remember watching Little Angels series and Dr Tanya (my hero!! ) said a lot of the kids were actually suffering syptoms of sleep deprivation.

doratheexplorer2 · 08/02/2007 15:47

What's omega3 supposed to do for them?

oliveoil · 08/02/2007 15:48

dd2 can be quite dreadful - search under my name, I have whinged on quite a lot about her

she is 2.6yrs and most days I would run away!

but I love her lots and just hope it is a phase

she hits, every single things is a battle etc etc etc

dd1 is 4 and always seems to be pushed to one side while I sort out madam

please try not to cry (easier said than done), count to 10 and leave the room

come on here!

pinkchampagne · 08/02/2007 15:49

Oh Jo, I know just how you feel. Strangly enough I was just thinking of starting a post very similar before spotting yours.
My 7 year old is constantly challanging me & answering back atm & my nearly 4 year old is constantly on a hyper drive & has terrible temper outbursts.
Being a parent can be a tough job at times!

Eeek · 08/02/2007 15:49

force yourself out the door regularly and before long it will be a habit and then soon after that you'll start looking forward to it. Do something you enjoy - just for you. After all you want to show your children that you can have fun and be interesting. It's for their own good

Original poster

Jo26 · 08/02/2007 16:12

I used to watch Child of Our Time with dr robert winston & I remember him giving the omega3 suppliment to a really disruptive 2year old who had really poor concentration. I spotted it when I was in Boots and thought I'd give it a go. Have no idea if its going to make a difference but as i said I'll try anything.
my daughter sleeps 11-12 hours most nights but 2/3 times a week will wake in the night because she's thirsty.
Sounds terrible but I find myself counting down the months/weeks/days til she starts full time school.

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Original poster

Jo26 · 08/02/2007 16:14

pinkchampagne, I thought things were meant to get better as they get older Well thats what my sister keeps telling me anyway but thats what they said when my 2.7yo was newborn

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doratheexplorer2 · 08/02/2007 16:15

Oh dear Jo. Must be off now but will be back later. Good luck with it all and keep your chin up!

Original poster

Jo26 · 08/02/2007 16:17

thanks for everything, I'll try not to go insane

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