Baby won't sleep on back- getting no sleep

[Chattycat78]

Just that really. Baby is 8 weeks. Suspect he has reflux. Won't settle at all on front or even side sometimes. Frets all night- result is no sleep. Am exhausted. Also have a toddler to run after so I need to have some energy for him.

We have tried infant gaviscon, tilting the cot etc. The only thing that works is putting him on his front. But is if you much of a risk to take?

It feels like a crap choice- either getting no sleep or putting him on his front and potentially at risk.

What do I do?

Ps- we have a detector thing we could put under his cot to sound an alarm if he isn't breathing- maybe this would be a solution?

Sorry just re read this- I mean he wont settle on his back as per the official guidance.....

We have the same issue with our 6wk old (not sleeping on her back and a toddler to run after, thankfully no reflux). After beating myself up for days about it, we decided to let her sleep on her tummy. Initially she would sleep on her back if we co-slept so I chose that as I saw it as a smaller risk, but she then started to roll onto her side (she's strong for her age!) and I kept waking up to find her with her face stuffed right into my boob and I was terrified she would suffocate. She has good head control and can easily lift and turn her head, and is ticking all the other safer sleeping recommendations so that's made me feel a little easier about it. We bought a monitor with a sensor mat too for piece of mind. Ideally she would be sleeping on her back but she won't for longer than 15mins at a time and we need to sleep too.

Do what you need to do. Sometimes you have to weigh up between two less than ideal choices. Are you going against guidelines on any other points?

No. No co sleeping. No hot room. Don't smoke or get drunk and sleep with him. No falling asleep with the baby- that's why I'm so bloody tired!

I think we're going to try the sensor with him on his front and see what happens.

Thanks

My eldest dc was born by emergency cs after being starved of oxygen for a significant length of time. (Thankfully he is fine). As a result of this, he spent the first 2 weeks of his life in SCBU. The nurses there had all the full term babies sleeping on their sides, they put a rolled up towel underneath the sheet to prevent them from rolling onto their front. they all said this was the best way to settle them and it worked. since then I went on to use this for my next 3 dc's. my dnephew also had reflux and wouldn't sleep on his back, this seemed to work for him too.

Both mine (now 2yo and 12wo) were from a young age, and continue to be front sleepers (although as young babies only during the early morning is from 2/3am onward oddly). I took the risk as the option is no sleep for anyone and they sleep beautifully on their front. I thought it was an awful thing to do but the amount of mums I have met that dos the same with their DCs from a young age is astonishing. Not saying you should/should not do it but wqnted to give my experience.

Ds wouldn't stay on his back, he turned on his side from birth. He slept on his side til he could roll and then slept on his front. Only now at 1 has he started sleeping on his back.

He was breech and his legs were bent up at birth which I think tipped him onto his side. That's how he was comfy.

I'm nor sure I'd put him.on his front at such an early age, I was paranoid enough when he started doing it himself.

You poor thing, I completely sympathise; we had the same problem with our dd.

Have you tried putting him in the bed with you (co-sleeping style) as our dd always preferred the softer mattress and closeness to us. Wouldn't suggest putting baby to sleep on his front at that age, although having the breathing monitor might make it a bit less dangerous.

We also tried shift-sleeping work with ours on the nights she just wouldn't settle. So for 3-4 hours I'd sit up on the sofa with dd asleep on my chest/shoulder, then DH would wake up and switch places with me. It was hard but we all got sleep, even if it wasn't the ideal situation.

And please don't listen to anyone who says letting your baby sleep on you will cause long-term attachment problems blah blah; load of crap.

You poor thing. I don't have personal experience of that but I wanted to come in and point out that guidelines are sometimes just that; guidelines. It is an important safety guideline and shoudn't be ignored just 'because' however in your situation I think as it's either a choice of no sleep or all of you getting much needed sleep, I think you need to do what's best for all of you. Guidelines unfortunately do not always suit every baby as well intentioned as they are, so I just want to make sure you don't feel like a terrible mother if you decide to follow your instincts on this rather than guidelines. Babies do not come with rule books, each one makes up their own rules!

Good luck and I hope you find a solution for you all to get some rest :)

Wedge on his side or let him sleep on his front.

We found starting our off on the front then when fast asleep rolling to the back worked well.

We let DD sleep on her side as she won't settle on her back. She only settles on her side 50% of the time if I'm honest. In SCBU they put her on both sides and her front to prevent sores. They said it's fine because she was on a monitor but you shouldn't do it at home. We have an angelcare monitor so, by the same principle, I feel okay about letting her sleep like that.

Apparently the risk of sleeping on their tummy is that if they were sick they might not be able to move their head and they might choke. Interestingly when DD1 was in NICU being on her front was better for her oxygen saturation as apparently they can breathe better on their front (opens up the lungs more).

Could be worth looking at getting a motion monitor if you'd like the reassurance.