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Parenting

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Toddler hitting

8 replies

coffeecakemum · 06/08/2016 15:57

Hi,

My 4 year old has been hitting a lot recently. I am not sure how to handle it. I always put him in another room and tell him off. Speak about being nice and using words if he is upset. But when he gets cross he just hits or punches. Right now he hit my eyes and its blue and am laying down with an eyes pack. My sister is telling him off and explaining what he did is wrong. Pl can someone give me tips on how to handle and discipline him. No one has ever raised hands on him and we always have been attentive to his needs. He is otherwise a caring loving clever boy who understands and socializes well. Thanks for reading

OP posts:
SeashellHoarder · 06/08/2016 22:44

I don't know, but the best I can suggest if you're current strategy isn't working is time out. 4.5 mins at this stage, tell him as you put him for the time out why he is having it, then no talking to him during the time out. At the end he should apologise to the person he hit, then he can carry on playing. No apology= more time out.

If time out doesn't work after a month then if do consequences, eg if you hit someone then I will take away a treat. I confiscate the iPad, but it could be anything and needs to be something fairly soon. Not like he hits you at breakfast and you say"well you won't have pudding tonight", the memory is too short.

Good luck

Sleeperandthespindle · 06/08/2016 22:48

I don't think many people think of four year olds as 'toddlers'. I've always been very 'gentle' in terms of disciplining but would be coming down very hard on hitting at at four!

Have you read '1,2,3 Magic'? I find it a good general strategy.

Sleeperandthespindle · 06/08/2016 22:49

Hitting would be 'straight to a 3' with previously discussed consequences.

coffeecakemum · 07/08/2016 19:07

Thanks v much for your reply. I will try to do time out. He needs something more stronger as I find him getting angry easily. We only give him iPad now for 20 mins. Will also try to read 123.

OP posts:
Sleeperandthespindle · 07/08/2016 22:16

You don't have to use time out. My DC don't cope with it so I use various alternatives when I have to (and I don't like it anyway). '1,2,3 Magic' has suggestions for alternatives.

elvislives2012 · 07/08/2016 22:19

How about blocking the hits, placing his arm by his side and very delibrately turning your back on him? Give no attention? Nothing. Not even putting into time out. I found that quite effective with my 4 year old. No attention whatsoever

ColdCottage · 29/06/2017 23:34

Did anything work?

ColdCottage · 02/07/2017 20:49

Guess not

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