Smacking children can affect schooling Smacking children can affect schooling Smacking children can affect schooling Smacking children can affect schooling

[papillon]

this

I also hear that horrible phrase 'stop crying or I'll smack you" endlessly. Another reason to outlaw smacking, I think. I find seeing children being smacked very distressing indeed.

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whispers

Secur: yes, exactly, but that's where 'knowing your child' comes in. Beety has hers down to a T and they seem to be responding well to her approach. You are NOT taking that tack with yours because they may well be differnt and that is not part of your overall relationship with them.

Well, I put 'Sweden smacking favour' into google and the first site that came up said 'Sweden's smacking ban: more harm than good' and the site was christian.org

Is that the kind of grenade you want Blu

It sounds as if Beety's much older kids react in the same way as my 3 year old. They go in their room and cool off, they come back and are pleasant company again. As for feelings of failure, maybe i'm harsh but that's something we all have to learn to accept, isn't it? DD knows that she can't do certain things at the moment because she's too small/incapable. doesn't mean that will always be the case. Similarly I would never try to gether to do something she may struggle with and then punish her for failing.

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That's why I love mumsnet. Other sites which agree with my views are soo boring. Brillian to have such a diverse discussion. Couldnt do it irl.

what were the other sites that came up when you googled that, tinker? fnarr

tinker, couldn't resist a read ! Even if you accept his view of the stats I can think of many confounds that he's chosen to ignore

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can´t comment on time out cause dd is too young.

Thanks for posting Piffleoffagus. That is why I posted Tuesday, 1 June, 2004 8:19:33 PM to try explain what life is like for some NZers. There are many Pacific Island and Maori families who aren´t like that. But in my town alot of Maoir families all lived in state houses down the same street in poverty and there was quite alot of back handed treatment. Not a generalisation.

Did you not understand at all Bloss that violence perpetutes violence? Something that all humans are accountable for I believe and not just if they smack their kids or not. If that is prejudice, to see interconnections in the behaviour of society, well I think THAT is rot. I think it is abit sad how you name and shame alot of us

I could just about cut and paste what you wrote about your mother. I am very close to both my parents and experience times with them that I think are both rare and special, like going tramping (hiking) with my father in the forest and then camping out and sitting in hot pools and really sharing our souls and feelings to each other. I moved home to be with my family when my Granny came to live with before she died. It was a very bonding time with my Mother, I have been there many times for her during grief and I am often the first person she turns to when she needs to talk. They were my best friends when I was a teenager and they are still are. But NOBODY is perfect. Which is why I told them that the memory of premeditated smacking by the hand is a negative memory.

Hadn't thought of that sq

secur, why would banning smacking be a bad thing? I can't think of how it would make anyone's life worse.

Lol secur am sure you have loads of friends irl but dont agree sometimes society needs to say no to something it is not ok to do this thing. Yes this may make things go underground but we have a society where taking a kid out in public can be difficult and where all sorts of abuse goes on all the time and sometimes I think there should be a signal saying stop we cannot allow kids to be treated in this way ever by anyone. I am sure that bloss will say I have gone over top again a failing of mine but I think there should be some sort of message give n to parents sometimes and kids need protection in so many ways. Interested that it is those christians advocating smacking again tinker! But wont go there as might make me cross.

The same page on Google brought up something from teh Observer. This line jumped out at me:

"Since Sweden banned smacking three decades ago, child deaths at the hands of parents have fallen to zero. In Britain, they average one a week"

If that's true that's staggering.

I do have to say, that though I strongly disagree with Bloss on this issue, I don't happen to think her posting have been rude or personal.

The worst punishment I think I've given my three children (simultaneously) was putting them in the car and driving round yelling at them in a completely demented and repetitive fashion. Well thought out rationale behind this cruel exercise was they couldn't run off and had to listen to me for as long as I felt like venting my anger.

I also can't imagine myself smacking except in anger. See post about 24 hours ago.

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