Spacing out feeds and bringing in easy... Any tips?

[cheerfullysleepless]

Hello! Hv has said I need to start spacing out feeds to three hours apart for my ds, three months. Initially ignored this as happy feeding on demand but thinking about it would help plan things a bit as at the moment hard to leave him with dh for long at all as feeding on demand. Also trying to bring in the baby whisperer easy thing but tricky when feeding to sleep at mo and feeding couple of times an hour for short feeds... He doesn't get distressed when I don't feed him instantly just fussy... Wondering what the best way to go about this, any suggestions?!

Bf or FF? Did the HV say why you need to space feeds out? Do you want to change things?

I think with spacing out feeds you have to try and work out if when we cries its because he is hungry or if its for some other need - tired/too hot or cold/ over stimulated/ bored etc.

I always went with the assumption that if that had had a decent feed in the last hour or so there is probably some other reason they are now getting upset, normally with my dd this was either tiredness or over stimulation or both! So would try a few other things first, if they didn't work then would feed!

He is so tiny. Please go with your instincts and if this is demand feeding, feeding to sleep and whatever else then do it. It sounds like quite outdated advice from your HV and there is nothing wrong with feeding to sleep as they all stop in the end. You may find that you end up having to rock to sleep or some other method that may take infinitely more effort and stress on both parts. If you want to be able to leave baby for a time, leave DH with a bottle (ebm or formula - the odd bottle here and there at this stage is unlikely to affect supply).

My HV said feeding on demand was still fine when my DD was 6 months old... it's entirely up to you though, go with your instincts and what you feel comfortable with.

Sounds an outdated advice. Feeding on demand is the best for babies, and as time goes the times between feeds will increase.
I don't think baby whisperer routine works for a breastfed baby though... I tried with DS1, but the life got much easier when I stopped trying that and just followed his lead... Didn't bother any routines with DS2, and we both are much more relaxed.

Neither of mine spaced milk feeds until eating solids. Just feed on demand and see if you can get a sleep of some description between feeds if it works for you.
Mine used to feed, stay awake for a bit, sleep, feed etc on repeat but it rarely lasted 3 hours

Bf and so far he's bottle refusing so just me.... Also feeding to sleep at night and most naps... Suppose what an worried about is when I have to go back to work four days a weekin September and actually want to do keep in touch day a week from May to summer holidays (am teacher) and half thought spacing might lead to less dependency on me and childcare shift bit easier... He's my first baby and mainly love the breastfeeding in fact probably offer far more than he wants it but do want to be able to do a few kit days without him feeling abandoned or much worse half starving for the day as refuses bottle!!!

There is a very long time between now and September. He'll be already on solids. So many things will change.

Something is a problem only if you see it as a problem. If it ain't broken don't fix it.

Agree with CarrotPuff. If breastfeeding is going well now, I wouldn't introduce changes. He is still very small. Don't worry about feeding to sleep - he will behave differently in childcare setting, because you will not be there. And he will be very different by September. Eating solids, drinking from a cup. I was feeding DS1 to sleep when he started nursery, but he quickly readjusted to fall asleep without me there. Staff said it was very common. At some point between 1 and 2 years old he stopped feeding to sleep by himself. Was much easier than if I tried to force it earlier. I know every child is different (and my 2 boys are totally different), but usually it is easier to follow their lead.
Can you do KIT half days to start with? May be an easier transition than a full day away.

That's really reassuring and not a bad idea re half days either - thank you!

Agree with pp re: September being very far away and things being very different. My ebf baby would only take formula from a bottle and it had to be on the hot side of warm. He would also only take mam bottles. I planned to do kit days too but didn't in the end because of BF. It was fine and work didn't mind.

I bf on demand too, but it wasn't a couple of times an hour, which sounds very demanding. How do you ever do anything? And if they're very short feeds, is he getting any hindmilk? I'm not a bf expert, so feel free to ignore that. But I know I made the mistake with my first of interpreting every cry as hunger, when often he was tired, and just using my boob as a dummy to get to sleep. Maybe try, if he's had a feed recently, just taking 5 minutes when he fusses to think, could it be tiredness or something else? Then if nothing else works, feed him - i.e. don't bf as a first resort every time.

Then between 4 and 6 months you can gradually start to establish more of a routine. And pps are right - when he's on solids his routine will change anyway.

I'm doing half days as KIT days, also my DD started nursery one day a week in December when she was six months old. She is a bottle refuser at nursery but does have solids and water thankfully. She was mainly breastfed up until just after Christmas and is now fully formula fed, did my last feed last week. She still refuses the bottle at nursery, but my HV pointed out that she is thriving and if she really wanted it she would take it, she takes a bottle off of myself, my DH and my parents.

I don't stress about it, I give her milk before nursery and then when she gets home and through the evening.

She refused the bottle even from me most days before Christmas and then it finally just clicked. Point is that a lot can change.

I still feed on demand, but she spaces feeds herself and is just over eight months old.

Sorry didn't mean constantly several times an hour but definitely sometimes that - anything from twenty mins to three hours between feeds... Thanks for suggestions guys appreciate it :) xxx

If it helps my DD is still fed on demand at 13 months. She has been going to a cm since she was 8ish months and happily has just one feed there and goes down for a nap without me and has from the start