Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Flip

1 2 3 4

Original poster

OK I know it's quite an individual situation thing but please place a vote for the best age gep in children!

84 replies

bramblina · 14/12/2006 21:05

From your experience- do you have what you consider to be the best gap? Or if you could tweak it a little, what would you have? Dh and I would like a 2yr and-a-bit gap between ds and the next but it's going to make no2 a christmas baby so I'm thinking...perhaps a little too hard...that we should leave it a little, to spring, making a 2 3/4 gap...hmmm

Anyone care to add something? Please?!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

busybusymum · 14/12/2006 22:19

personally I loved my 18 month age gap!

twickersmum · 14/12/2006 22:21

19 months was a shocker!

shepherdswatchedtheirfLOCKETS · 14/12/2006 22:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

General parenting

Nemoinapeartree · 14/12/2006 22:34

I had 2.2yrs between ds and dd which is a excellent gap, no problems and no jealousy although that may be due to being different sexes. Also get some 1-1 time with DD when DS is at playgroup. Will have 12mths between DD and DB[DD 1 on sat and will have baby beginning of jan] will let you know with that one..can see it being physically harder but hopefully easier in long run.

bambi06 · 14/12/2006 22:38

18 mths between my two and although tiring a the beginning,it has worked very well and they play together very well ..most of the time and they both have the same wants and needs in toys so ideal really

QuadropheniaonIce · 14/12/2006 22:41

I had three under 15 months, sounds horrific but wasn't anywhere near as bad as people think, they all still slept during the day etc.
As they have grown older and number four came along, well thats a different story.

suedonim · 14/12/2006 22:57

I'm not the person to ask as the smallest gap I have is 4.5yrs, which most people think is an ENORMOUS gap. However, I've read that between 18mths and 3yrs is the worst gap for sibling rivalry. There's 2.2yrs between me and bro and we still don't get on!

magicstaronthefarawaytree · 14/12/2006 23:04

three under three brill for me. tho easy to forget on occaision - ie getting dressed, brushing teeth etc the usual suspects!

JanH · 14/12/2006 23:10

My gaps are 3 yrs, 3 yrs and 5 yrs and they all get on remarkably well most of the time . I could not be doing with more than one baby at a time so those gaps suited me fine and when DS2 was born, DD1 was 11 and DD2 was 8 and they were a huge help.

DB is 22 months older than me and we had quite a competitive relationship as children (I blame my mother though, she did the classic crown prince thing with him)

maryhadaharpsichordyeahlord · 14/12/2006 23:14

I have 2.5 years and it rocks
no jealousy at all
they get on really well
the older one is old enough to understand not to squeeze too hard
older one can walk
no real overlap with nappies
older one started preschool when younger one just born.

NYcicles · 15/12/2006 00:52

21 months here too. Was throught all of the newborn stuff (-lack of sleep, constant feeding, etc.) before terrible twos came along. Eldest can't remember before youngest was born. May be speaking too soon though as youngest is just getting properly mobile and eldest is getting jealous!

FairytaleOfNewNORKSBRIDE · 15/12/2006 01:22

3 under 3yo was good for me too. Am contemplating 4th but this time there will be a whopping 3 year age gap, I'd rather it was only 1-2 years but we've missed the boat!

CouldEquallyHaveBeenAnAardvark · 15/12/2006 01:23

I've a 21m age gap and it works for us because that's our family and I can't imagine it any other way!

NYcicles · 15/12/2006 01:57

Oh, we do have two in nappies, and the whole double buggy issue though!

wickedwinterwitch · 15/12/2006 02:16

I have a 6yr gap (diff husbands) and it's fab.

frazzledazzle · 15/12/2006 10:19

Theres a 2yr gap between mine(3.2 and 13mnths)and so far so good.There is no jealousy and they love playing together.

When no3 arrives there'll be 3.8yrs between oldest and youngest.I'm looking forward to the challenge

WhenSantaWentQuietlyMad · 15/12/2006 10:28

hi naughtymummy, i was interested to hear that you found a 2.5 yr age gap easy! I think it is important to get any one opinion into perspective, which is why I am glad to see your experience here.

I think, looking back, I found it difficult because I couldn't walk for 4 weeks after the birth with SPD, and trying to manage the two was really hard. Then I found it really hard to get out of the house for a good 6 months because of the pain and associated problems. Obviously that is just my unique experience and unlikely to be relevant to others.

On the positive side, I hope that they are just close enough to be friends (both girls). And once dd1 was out of nappies (quite late) and starting to be much more independent it got easier.

The jealousy was a big worry for us, but we have handled it. I think whatever age gap we had, I would have found it difficult having two!

WeWishUAMerryXmasNANappyNewYr · 15/12/2006 13:43

naughtymummy - you said you knew families with 11m and 13m gap. you say it is easy now but did they find it easy in the beginning?

fairytale and magicstar - what age gap do you have between each lo?

nutcracker · 15/12/2006 13:45

I had a 2 yr gap between 1&2 and that was too small imo, found it really hard.

Had a 3yr gap between 2&3 and that was loads better.

SchneeBallFight · 15/12/2006 13:46

17 month gap - no probs and they are best pals!

foxtrottothefestivegrotto · 15/12/2006 13:51

between 13-15 months (but that's all i have experience of - it does mean you never put the baby stuff away between babies LOL)

happystory · 15/12/2006 14:07

4 years worked well for us. As someone said earlier,the older one can be prepared and can also entertain himself when necessary. We had about a year of both at home (tho ds was at preschool 3 mornings) then I had dd to myself when he started in reception. Echo the no double-buggy/nappies scenario. Now they are older (11 & 15)they are v close especially as an 11 year old girl is nearly as mature as a 15 year old boy

twoisenoughmum · 15/12/2006 14:07

Bramblina - yes, I'd say 2 and 3/4 years is probably easier than 2 and a bit years. Only because the older one may be out of nappies, or will be close to being out of nappies, and you could even manage without a double buggy if you get a good buggy board. So speaks a reasonably sane and contented Mum of a girl who was 2 years 8 months when her baby brother was born. I actually did the positive pregnancy test on the day of her second birthday.

mamijacacalys · 15/12/2006 14:08

Another vote for 4 yr gap. DS started Reception just after DD born. Good IMO!

BrandyTutter · 15/12/2006 14:08

there'll be 26 months between them

in an ideal world it would have been at least 3 years, but i'm no spring chicken, plus i assumed it would take a lot longer to get pg this time (took aaaaaaages last time) (but not this time)

Flip

1 2 3 4