Interfering neighbour

[eallison88]

So I just got phone call from my lovely next door but one neighbour (we love her. She looks after our cats when we're away had them when I had my baby at home). She was asking me if everything is alright. I told it was and asked why she was asking,wondering if she'd noticed something with the cats or some damage to the house I've not seen yet. Upon being pressed, she admitted that our joint neighbour (in between us) was worried cos she'd heard DS crying a lot. I calmly explained he'd had a bad night, was having a grump but currently sleeping.

I am so pissed off with the neighbour between us. Am I being unreasonable? I feel that if she was worried then rather than discuss me (and presumably my parenting) with someone, pop round and ask if there's anything she could do to help (hold baby/wash up/give chocolate). She's a nursery manager, so now I feel like perhaps I am just a crappy mum.

Perhaps lovely neighbour met not-so-lovely neighbour and asked how she was and not so lovely neighbour said she was tired (and off to work as a nursery manager...) because she'd not had much sleep because of the crying baby next door...

I think you're being over sensitive to immediately assume people are criticising your parenting.

If she knows how well you get on with your next-but-one neighbour, she might have just thought she might have been better placed to help you. A sort of 'Poor eallison, I think the baby might be poorly as it was crying a lot - may be you could give her a call as I know you're friendly' type thing?
If she is a nursery manager she will know that babies cry, and that sometimes there is nothing you can do to stop them. She won't tink you are a bad mum.

Maybe she was pointing out to your neighbour that you'd obviously had a tough couple of nights. Along the lines of "oh, poor old eallison, I heard the baby up a lot last night she must be knackered". If that sort of thing I wouldn't think it weird or interfering.

Maybe she was just concerned? Didn't want to bother you so asked the neighbour to check things were ok? Maybe she thought it would be too intrusive to knock on your door and ask directly.

I feel sorry for our neighbours as 3-month-old DS has awful colic and reflux. He screams and cries for a few hours most eves.

Does your neighbour have children? If so maybe hers were quiet babies (or it was so long ago she's forgotten how noisy they were?)

My kind neighbour pretends she 'can't hear a thing' when I apologise for the noise DS makes. Likewise I pretend I can't hear her toddler's screaming tantrums

And BTW you're not a crappy mum! Some babies just cry more than others. And some neighbours are hyper-sensitive to noise.

I don't think she was judging your parenting, more like indirectly trying to find out if you need help. If she doesn't know you it would be a bit forward to just knock on your door!

Honestly?
Your over thinking it!

I've 6 dc no one has ever popped round & helped/made a cup of tea/held the baby!