Kathryn Mewes: The supernanny who is now a struggling mum

[MummRaaa]

This is quite a sad article, though part of me does want to say, "so it's not as easy as it looks then, love?!"

www.telegraph.co.uk/women/mother-tongue/11977203/Kathryn-Mewes-The-supernanny-who-is-now-a-struggling-mum.html

I saw her in waitrose (natch) about a month ago and while her make up and hair were immaculate, she didn't look particularly happy it must be said. Baby was in a sling so couldn't see the wee mite. Made me feel better as I was a lot scruffier but more cheerful with my brood of three under 3 inc a 2mo in the bed with us most nights.

Eye mask and ear defenders made me think of what you do for a scared animal. Never heard of anyone doing that in labour - bizarre!

I expect her expectations of how she would cope with being a mother were so high that she was bound to fall short, and then feel like a failure (in pjs, not walked the dog, not got the champagne in!)

This article just made me sad really. Wondering whether to paint her nails while her baby is crying downstairs?

And if wine being ready for the husband when he gets home is more important than making sure you're meeting the needs of a baby then I've obviously had my priorities wrong all this time.

Babies cry for other reasons than being wet/hungry/tired don't they? Like being lonely, or sad or whatever? They're little humans, not robots ffs.

Maybe it's a rebranding exercise.
She doesn't sound particularly humbled, though.

The Super-Nan hired her own Super-nanny when the baby was 3 days old and STILL struggled to get dressed by 11am or get anything done. With all her so-called professional expertise behind her. Why should I be interested in this person???

Didn't Kirsty Young write a similar article about the difficulties of becoming a single mother, blar-dee-blar. With small aside that she lived with her mother since before the birth (mother cooked, did housework, lots of babysitting & hands-on, etc). Like the supernanny, nobody KY knew had actually succeeded at breastfeeding or low-intervention childbirth, etc. This last fact was supposed to be meaningful for reasons that entirely escaped me.

FFS. Whatta pair of plonkers. Could someone pay me £££ to write an article about most things going fine?

She had the breastfed newborn sleep trained and she wasn't gaining weight. Maybe the baby was bloody hungry?

At least she's honest I guess.

If I remember correctly Prof Tanya Byron had to see a sleep specialist to get her baby to settle

Shows it's not that easy.

And the emotional investment you have in your own DC is worlds away from dealing with someone else's.

Poor woman didn't like feeling so out of control, the numbness she describes must be frightening. I'm glad she feels she's back on track.

F Scott Fitzgerald supposedly said,
" The rich are different from you and me ",
maybe here substitute "experts" for "rich"?

Experts that the rich experts can afford to pay for. Rest of us get to muddle along and sometimes told to feel bad that we don't do what the rich experts can't even do for themselves (FFS).

I started off thinking it would be a case of high expectations and also a commendable desire to do the right thing taken a bit too far.

However the sleep training of such young babies as described is incomprehensible to me. Is it considered beneficial to the child in any way?

Very weird set of priorities. Why does she think it's so important to teach a baby to be independent at 6 weeks old? Unfortunately what she is teaching her child is that she can't depend on mummy when she needs her.

I feel a bit sorry for her. Her partner sounds like a bit of a dick - who the fuck tells someone "you need to bond with the baby" and pisses off to work?

But then I definitely don't see the need to get a "sleep trainer" in, especially at such a young age. The thought of leaving such a tiny baby to settle themselves makes my heart hurt.

We had a nanny when ours were young, not for sleep training or overnight, just whilst I worked.

Our wonderful nanny would always say that it was easy to look after babies on a good night's sleep. She was also the first to admit that parenting and nannying are worlds apart.

What annoys me is when it is assumed that nannying and parenting skills are interchangeable. If you are a highly skilled and successful nanny then by all means share those skills with other nannies, but don't assume they are necessarily relevant to parenting.

My god that is so disturbing.

She questions whether going to her newborn baby is for the baby or her conscience ? She gets a sleep trainer for a two week.old baby????

The woman is a psychopath.

Also.she talks about feeling completely out of control but then you realise her baby is only two weeks old.! She makes it sound as though she had a terrible time.for. months.

What kind of person leaves a 2 week old to cry ..she sounds like a sad character.

I think it's verging on neglect, but what do I know, [old hippy] emoticon anyone?

It's a bit sad all round really. No cradling baby to sleep or snugly night feeds where it feels like its just the two of you in the whole world.

Rose tinted they may be but these memories are precious.

I struggled with the bit when she gets home from hospital, then sorts laundry and washes up all while her newborn is screaming. I just can't comprehend leaving a newborn to scream all that time. Or at all, really.

I agree onehorse, who on earth thinks responding to a newborn crying is for your own conscience

Hmm I think that Kathryn and the sleep training woman are going into business together. This is a great puff piece for the woman's skills, and if she's as in demand as a previous poster says then the booking would have been made well in advance and not last minute because she wasn't coping. I'm suspicious of this article.

Oh that poor baby

I've just fed my 16 mo dd back to sleep while reading this and was so thankful I've done things the way I did.

It's been imensely difficult, no family support so just dp and I, and I've had pnd and anxiety since having her. The sleep deprivation and wake ups can be horrendous but at least my child knows I'm always there for her.

I knew at the time after watching an episode of that program that she would feel different with her own child.

That poor, poor baby. No wonder it was losing weight if she made it sleep through the bloody night so young.

Interesting article but it doesn't sound like a happy home. Glad my DH didn't put an eye mask and ear defenders on me at the end of labour - how weird!!
Also odd that there are many pointers that would raise concerns about PND and bonding, yet now the baby has been "sleep trained" - really, at 10 weeks?! - all is reportedly well again, clean house, wine in fridge for husband getting back....

Having said that, I do like some of her tips for toddlers. Just not the bits that involve lots of crying.

I wonder how much this woman costs who made her baby sleep? I am a bit though as I have yet to have a full night's sleep in the last two years

And Ming yes, I was working until my baby needed feeding back to sleep and that's when I read the article....now she is asleep, we've had a snuggle and I can finish my work. Not actually that disruptive really!!

Actually she sounds ignorant and poorly trained.
Breastfeeding a newborn and sleep training are for the most part incompatible. It's basic knowledge.

Fucking horrific.

Who the fuck sleep trains a newborn?? Selfish cow. God forbid her new baby get in the way of doing her sodding nails.

She sounds like a total psychopath. Poor baby, I can't even imagine leaving a newborn to cry whilst you fuck around upstairs.

She sounds awful.

I find it quite sad that the basic message bills down to "I used to think mothers who got upset when their babies cried were just being soft, until I had my own baby and found out it wasn't that easy - so I hired someone to teach me that I too was just being soft, and she ignored my crying newborn for me while I went out with the dog." Not exactly progress, is it?