Am I too sort of my children

[MyBoyz02]

This is my first ever thread looking for advise no negative comments please!
I have 2 boys 9 and 7 years old we were recently started a friends house for dinner, to me there plates were overloaded with food ( they don't eat that much and the food was put on by our friend) any way the kids couldn't eat it all and wanted dessert after which is fine by me the friend moaned about this saying her grandchildren wouldn't be getting anything but gave in and gave them dessert anyway. A week later we were at the friends again just to say hi, then out of no were she starts having a full on swearing rant at the boys saying if they were hers that would have eat everifying they were given I can't have rules for to little s**T's and no my own and you 2 and ur mum are a bunch of pansies and baby's and which my eldest slightly smiled at so she carrys on u want take.that grin of your face if you were my grandchild I'd come.over their and slap.if off your face mate. My and.my partner (it's his friend) just stood there in shock.
The kids then went very quietly into the front room, we Heard a knock so she went to see if it was the door but jo one there and she says to the.kids did u 2 hear that knocking and.they didn't answer ( not surprised) so.she.shouts don't answer.then.u.little. F*kers to which.my partner laughed? .
I said to him on the way home would u let ur.mum.talk to.them.like that and like yes of course I no full well he wouldn't. And this all because they had dessert after a meal am I too sort for letting them?!

Letting them have a dessert is not the issue here,my children would never be seeing this person again.

Sorry there some spelling mistakes and wrong words was typing too fast! Was a bit pi**ed off writing it out!:-)

Right, but why did you allow your kids to be verbally abused like that?

I'm not a confrontational person I've never had a proper argument in my life, I think she wanted a reaction but she didn't get one but I do feel.like a shit parent for not defending them they rbmy life and I wish I had the guts too be stronger for them

That's a friend that spoke to your kids like that? Blimey. I'd be leaving on the first comment, not hanging around for the rest and I'd never want to see this person again!

You didn't need to confront her. You just needed to get your kids and walk out.

But anyway it's done now. I certainly wouldn't be going back again if I were you.

There's banter and there's being plain rude and an absolute dck. this woman sounds like a dck. you don't speak to other people's kids like that, let alone swear and verbally abuse them. Not only did she insult your children, but you as well by calling you a pansy? I would have had her about it and walked out.

She will probably think of you as a push over now as you didn't do anything or stand up for yourself.

The very fact that this is about pudding just shows that this woman is a controlling weirdo with anger problems.

never see this woman again. SHe's horrible

My mum's best friend when we were growing up could be a bit fruity with her language. So could her husband.

But never, ever would swearing be actually directed at children.

Your so called friend tore a strip off your boys and you just stood there. If this is true, then I have no words.

Update I've had it out with her and we are not welcome at hers ( my partner is tho!) and she never want to come to mine again = result

That is a result. She sounds toxic. She was at fault. However I must add that rather then waste food, you should put some of it back if you've been given too much

Whether or not you're too soft is not the issue here. The issue is a grown adult threatened to smack your children. Over the fact that they had dessert, which is none of her business. I'd be seriously considering bringing criminal charges against her. What she did was threatening behavior and must have very traumatic for your boys. Not to mention yourself.
I don't know what your partner was laughing at. I don't think it was in anyway remotely funny. And believe me. I have not had a sense of humor bypass.
I dsmn well hope she is now an ex friend.
I'd have serious doubts that she can be trusted around children.