Helicopter Parent or Reasonable Request?

[Earlybird]

Oh dear. Following an exchange with dd's teacher this morning, I think I might be veering into "helicopter parent" territory.

The school Christmas play is due to begin rehearsals today, so this morning I asked the teacher if tall-for-her-age dd could be placed somewhere that she could be visible. For the last 4 productions, she has been placed on the last row, near/on the end, and inevitably in the shadows. For the summer play she was even partially obscured by part of the light rig apparatus.

Anyway, the teacher looked at me with a forced smile, and an expression like "get a life". She then said in a slightly pitying/patronising way "well, she is tall so will naturally be at the back, but we'll see what we can do".

Helicopter parent or reasonable request? Either way, it's not a big deal, but would like some objective opinions please....

As a parentI think you are being reasonable - you are ensuring that your daughter is seen. (She may not realise whether she seen or not by the way ).

As a teacher, if everyone came in to tell me where they thought their child should stand ( EVEN IF YOU HAD A REALLY GOOD REASON ) then can you imagine how hard that would make my job?

Xmas play time is REALLY stressy for teachers but is also lovely for mums and dads to watch their kids. If she is tall and she stood at the front then she might have blocked out other children but there is no reason not to stand at the back in the middle.

I do know how frustrating it is to sit through a Christmas play and hardly be able to see your child.
But I do think it's just one of those things you have to put up with.
At my children's school, there are 90 of them in the play - and with the best will in the world, there's no way they can all have an equal share of the limelight. Well, not unless we all sat there for three hours...
TBH, I think the main thing is that your dd enjoys it, thinks she did well and knows that you were there cheering her on.
So speaks the mum of the 14th innkeeper's friend from the left who doesn't even get to go on the stage...

Thanks for your thoughts. I know Christmas must be very stressful for teachers, and don't want to add to that.

I absolutely would not have said anything if it had happened once or even twice. But, it seems that she is destined to lurk in the rear shadows of any school production owing to her height. Just was hoping (without being pushy or awful), to give her a slightly different position for a change....

If only she could stand in front of my (also tall for his age) ds so everyone wouldn't see him picking his nose, as he did all through last year's play. That's when he wasn't hoicking up his shepherd's dress to show his pants.

And he WAS at the back....

Get her to take up smoking for Christmas - it'll stunt her growth nicely in time for next year's Christmas play?

Maybe I should get her some kneepads and she can "walk" or "stand" on her knees?

bbs - you must have been so proud!!

Hunker - what about a diet of fruit shoots and McDonalds? She could then be so hyperactive that they'd want her down the front to keep her still!

Oh, good plan, EB! Yes, I'd do that. Perhaps she could smoke a pipe? Tis more becoming for a primary-age child, I think.

Ah, BBS, I'm with you on that one. DS - unspecified angel, front, centre when the "angel dancing" stopped - spent a goodly portion of the play lifting up his T shirt to examine his tummy and some good tugs at the (very visible) waistband of his pants. That was the performance they recorded, as well....