Nurseries

[ohthegoats]

Do all nurseries feel a bit urgh? She's started her settling in sessions, and seems fine with it all, but I'm not really fine. The people are nice enough, the other kids seem nice enough, but the actual nursery environment just doesn't feel 'nice' - things feel shabby I guess, just not very homely.

I've only compared two options, one of which is too far away really, so this is sort of 'it'.

Am I going to find them all 'not as nice as home' just because it's impossible for them to be that way all the time, or do I need to look around for another option?

I loved the baby room at the children's centre nursery mine went to. It wasn't like home - it was bigger, airier, more child sized furniture (eg. the babies/toddlers all sat round a little table to eat, they had "coracle" beds), big, well adapted outside space with lots of challenging things for babies to climb on in and outside.

My youngest is at a lovely childminder though, have you considered that?

A child minder would have been my first choice, but they are almost impossible to find where I live.

To be honest though, I think the child needs a nursery environment. She seems to love big busy places, and it's more about what suits her isn't it. She's walking and climbing a lot, which there are lots of options for in the room she's going in to. It's on the first floor though, which means they have more organised time outside, instead of free flow sort of movement like there used to be in a nursery at a school I worked at.

Longer term (when she's 2), I'd sort of prefer a preschool I think - attached to a 'big school', so this is only a year. But a long year for her.

If the staff are good, the environment doesn't have to be top notch - DD does a lot of singing, dancing, reading and talking in funny voices, all of which could be done in an empty field!

Also, any baby room is going to struggle with free flow to the garden because a lot of the kids won't be walking.

See how it goes, I have been consistently unsure about DD's key workers but without exception she's adored every one and will leap out of my arms to get to them, so nursery seem to know what they're doing!

I've never been to a nursery if describe as "shabby and not homely". I've been to ones that are lovely and airy and nicely decorated. And I've been to ones that are shabby - BUT the shabbier ones have always felt nice and homey to me. Loads of artwork in the walls and things. Mess that's the result of creative play.

How many nurseries have you visited? I saw five the first time & went on my gut reaction. Ds went at six mo and has absolutely loved it, he's two now. We moved recently and I've visited two and again chosen in gut.

I kind of know what you mean. The nursery DD attends probably isn't going to win any awards for its decor. It's not 'homely' in a way. We used childminders before so it was a bit of a surprise seeing a nursery. We also chose DD's nursery as a bit of a "this is it" option, which didn't entirely help how I feel about. However, the choice at the time was either the nursery with Montessori teachers, or all the time with a childminder and no 'education' before starting Reception, which we didn't want.

It's a different environment. Bigger. More open spaces. More tables and classroom stuff then in someone's home.

But it really is about what suits them. Realistically, if the assistants are kind and caring, there are plenty of other kids, the food is nice and you're happy with the day to day care, it's good.

I wavered a bit the first week or two of leaving DD(3) at her new nursery and had panics that we'd cocked up massively with the school nursery places and childminder (didn't really understand the system and it was a fiasco) but in the two months she has been going there she has come on massively. She's learning things like a sponge and absolutely adores it there. That's what matters.

We actually chose a "shabbier" nursery over a posher one because it was smaller and more intimate and our dd was only 6 months old. To me the most important thing is that the staff are friendly and kind, everything else is a bonus. Like you we were limited in our choices (also fiendishly hard to get childminders here). Seems to have worked out as both our DCs are settled, happy children.

I'm a teacher, and my current school is the only one I've worked in that doesn't have a nursery attached (how annoying -no chance of cheaper childcare! typical timing)... I've seen lots of nurseries, but have never looked at them from the point of view of my child going there. Hence I'm wondering if I'm just being a bit precious.

At her visit yesterday something upset her, they brought her over to me to show her that I was there etc, and she carried on crying and turned to her key worker for comfort. So you know, she's already liking them enough to choose them over me depending on circumstance. Which is exactly what you want.

As long as the space is safe and not too cramped, it doesn't matter too much if its shabby.
Its the carers that make the difference. If your child has sufficient caring, warm, engaged attention, she won't care if the paint is peeling and she's playing with an empty cardboard box. If she's developing a good relationship with staff then that's key.
Dd has been besotted with various staff members at her nursery over the years. Its really sweet.

A childminder is no more a guarantee of good care than a nursery am afraid. I know as many parents who have been unhappy with CMs as I do those unhappy with nurseries.