8 year old boy with anger issues

[RealLadyJo]

Hi everyone! I hope there are people out there who can help me! I have an 8 year old boy who is very loving at home and yet he can have such anger issues. I have to admit, his short temper may have been inherited from me but when I was his age I was never how he is now. And I am at my wits end.

Almost daily when he comes home from school, I get a note or a call from his teacher who tells me he has either pushed someone, yelled at someone, thrown something at someone or hit someone. He is small boy - the smallest in his class so the hitting he does is not really hurtful. But nevertheless, hitting is wrong.

When I ask him why he does these things the answers are often petty reasons. "She annoyed me", "He kept saying I was a liar", "He said I was noisy", "He cut in line" - any time he perceives that someone has wronged him, he lashes out. I don't know what to do anymore.

I am a single mom, so it is just me and I've tried punishment, rewards, working with his teachers and more but to no avail...he'll improve for a while but then he'll go back.

I feel so helpless. I do no know what to do anymore. Please if any of you have any suggestions, I welcome them.

Thank you in advance.

I'm no expert at all but how about you have something g at home, a trampoline, a punchbag, a pillow attached to a piece of string hung from a garden tree, a football attached to some string.
Your DS is told that it's ok to feel upset or angry at the other child for being horrible to hi but they way he is showing his anger is unacceptable.
When he gets home he can take his anger or upset out on the trampoline, punchbag etc.

Does he have a good friendship group at school? With play dates out of school?
Do you have a local sports centre where he can learn a martial art! These are great for teaching children that physical aggression must be controlled and safe.
Good luck.

On the school side, when you chat about it, dont shout at him, say tell me what happened? Then ask what else could he have done instead of hitting? If hes ok at home, dont punish him for what happened at school, they should have done that. Support school... yes you lost playtime for hitting, thats right. Tell him your unhappy that he behaves like that, and leave it.