5th Birthday looming - whole class party or select few

[AspiringSuperMum]

A 5th birthday party is looming in our household. I'm facing a real dilemma when it comes to who to invite - should I invite a small group from the class who actually have genuine relationships with my child, or 'do the right thing' and invite everyone including 2 children for whom my child has expressed a dislike?

And while on the subject, has anyone done a go karting party for 5 year olds - or are they too young?

Why is inviting everyone doing the right thing? That seems crazy. Invite the people he wants to invite.

And go karting wouldn't suit everyone at 5 and there may be some hesitant parents. I would go with something else.

Definitely don't invite the whole class except two, that is definitely not the right thing to do, it's just unkind.

Inviting a few special friends is fine though.

I don't think inviting the whole class is 'the right thing to do'. In fact Id suggest that hosting a party for 30 five year olds is mildly bonkers and not for the faint hearted

what you don't do is invite all the class except for a few. Assuming he's in a class of 30 I would suggest you go for a number he and you feel comfy with, up to about half the class? Above that I think you would have to bite the bullet and have the lot.

What's the Mumsnet rule? 'Whole class or less than half'?

I invited my DCs whole class in Reception. He was in a class of 15 so I could afford that. I wouldn't have been able to afford a party for 30 though!

I don't like the idea of excluding just one of two children but inviting a few special friends out of the whole class is fine.

Or you persuade your 5 year old they don,t really want a party ;-)

Only joking...but when I asked DS2 whether he would prefer a party or a family day out, he chose the day out. Perfect.

...although don't rely on your DH to organise anything if he's like mine: booked tickets for the sky garden. For the wrong date. Cue us walking through Central London with DS2 wailing "you've RUINED my birthday day out"
He was fine when we got to the Tower of London though.

I have exactly this dilemma. Invitations due to go out on Monday. My DS class size is 24 and hd wants to invite 18 of them plus a few others from another class. Is 6 too few to leave out? He hasn't been invited to many parties this year so I know he doesn't play with everyone, but I don't want to be mean and leave only a couple out. Is 6 enough to leave out, guilt free?!

Minikievs - sorry, I think it's too few to leave out without in being hurtful, it would definitely seem like a whole class party they've been excluded from.

I think you need to stick with halfish or less not to come across that way.

We had 5 children for the 5th birthday party, 4 for the 4th, 3 for the 3rd, then no parties for 2 and 1 (well family but that doesn't count).

From 6 onwards it's one friend for a special treat/ day out.

Don't put yourself through hell for no reason!!

Thanks for the response attheendoftheday. Sadly, I think you might be right. Harrumph, back to the invitation drawing board tomorrow I think!

This year we invited the whole class to my 6 year old's party and hired a local hall. Most people didn't rsvp either way, so I did enough food and party bags for thirty kids, just in case. 4 children from the class came. With my 2 plus a few cousins etc we had about 12 kids altogether, but I was a bit miffed. I could have just done a much cheaper party at home!

With my 7 year old we went to a venue that could only take 15 altogether. In the end, 2 people never RSVPed and another 3 said yes then didn't come.

Next year I think I'm just going to get them to invite 1 friend each to take to the pictures or on a day out!

Are you me? Also thinking about this dilemma and also thinking of karting. Let me know what you decide!