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Parenting

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Original poster

Giving up Expressing

10 replies

BlueThursday · 16/02/2015 20:51

I'm sitting a bit teary as I've just made the decision to give up expressing.

DD is 5 weeks and has been combination fed but I just can't keep up the expressing. Firstly I'm still not producing anymore than 100ml a time and secondly I'm finding everything else, including time with DD, is being neglected due to this. I'm barely eating myself these days.

So when DH and I Skyped tonight we decided to go exclusively with the ready made.

Think I just need a little virtual hand holding really and telling it's not the end of the world

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callamia · 16/02/2015 21:07

Expressing is hard work, really hard work. I only did it to keep DS in milk while I was at work and it was draining and burdensome. No one will judge you for stopping. It's exhausting, and you need to look after yourself too.

You *could just provide one 4oz bottle per day, if you felt like expressing once would be manageable - this might assuage your sadness a little. It's definitely not the end of days, I promise. In a few months, this will seem far away.

Original poster

BlueThursday · 16/02/2015 21:13

Thank you - I know in my head it's better to have the time available to actually BE with DD rather than plonking her down while I do it - need to be brave!!

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DirtyDancing · 16/02/2015 23:04

Expressing is hard. Really hard. I BF my son for 7 months and tried in vain to express so he could be given a bottle from time to time. I totally gave up. Introduced formula at 6 months instead.

I also hardly had any milk come out, I hated the actually expressing process as felt like daisy the cow, and it was all just horrible. Completely stop. Accept that it's okay to have tried it and it didn't work for you and never feel bad about it again! Once you take the stress away it will be so much easier. Well done for giving it a go xxx

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mrshjb · 17/02/2015 09:38

My DS was born at 36+3 after I was induced with suspected pre eclampsia. I really wanted to bf but he wouldn't latch and I just found it all really stressful and I didn't want to risk him losing weight because he was only 5lb 5oz to start. I wanted him to have breast milk so I started expressing with the intention of moving to bf. I just didn't have the energy to keep trying to bf so decided to exclusively express. The first 3 weeks when my DH was at home weren't too bad but as soon as he went back to work and I was trying to feed my son, express, sterilise, eat myself, clean, wash etc etc it all just got too much. I was also finding I couldn't leave the house much, couldn't have long in bed even when DH was looking after the baby and was also constantly in pain with engorgement. So at 5wks I decided to start introducing formula and decreasing my milk supply. I felt so unbelievably guilty about it and like I'd failed myself and my son. But everyone acknowledges how hard expressing is and it's so much more important to be in a better frame of mind to look after your child. DS is now just over 6 weeks old and as of yesterday is fully formula fed. It's hard but I've come to terms with it and I feel much better physically and emotionally for stopping expressing.

Good luck with it all and try not to be too hard on yourself (easier said than done I know!)

fazool · 17/02/2015 12:27

I pretty much exclusively expressed for a while and it was awful. Don't feel bad about giving up at all, some of us just have a really difficult time with breastfeeding.

Original poster

BlueThursday · 17/02/2015 17:41

Thank you all for the encouragement :)

Nearly 24 hours in and going well although I'm in bloody agony! DD seems none the wiser for the change so things are good

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soundsystem · 17/02/2015 21:14

glad it's going well :) really tough decision to make - I had the same thing and was upset at first until I realised how much more time I had to spend with dd!

mrshjb · 18/02/2015 04:31

I was in awful pain when I stopped so I just expressed to take the edge off and tried to go as long as possible in between. Took me around a week to stop having to express. I found an ice pack took the edge of the burning when things got really bad!

Nolim · 18/02/2015 05:51

I was not producing enough ans it was stressing me to no end. Then a realized that a well feed baby and a happy mom is more important than breastmilk.

Formula is not poison and your ability as a mum is not measured by your breasts. Be kind to yourself

Original poster

BlueThursday · 18/02/2015 14:21

Thanks all it's kept me upbeat about this.

Loving how much time I've got available for DD now and, to be honest, a little time for myself - managed to have a sandwich whilst DD is napping instead of running around sterilising the pump and expressing.

I think I've made the right choice for me it's working out great.

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