How much attention do you give your DC if you're SAH?

[bestandlast]

I'm on mat leave still so at home with my DD 7 months.

I just wondered how much time everyone devotes to entertaining their DC aged 6months + during the day.

I never seem to get anything done other than entertaining. She BF on demand still plus I make her 2 meals. There just never seems to be time to get anything else constructive done.

I must be going wrong somewhere. Anyone?

nope not at all! sounds perfectly normal to me! sod all gets done here until dd is in bed. in fact I sat down to my first cup of tea since yesterday about 20 mins ago.

if you find you are struggling perhaps use a travel cot as a play pen if your dc is mobile and fill it with favourite toys that cam be played with independently.

dd has just turned 1 but the menace walked at 9months so my life is a constant stream of chaos aversion!

I feel like I spend all of my time either trying to stop 8 month old DS from hurting himself and/or entertaining him! As to doing anything constructive??? Absolutely sod all gets done until OH comes home from work at which point I rush around doing all of the crap I should have done throughout the day. I think it's time for me to just accept that I will never again have a spotlessly clean house, ironed clothes or hot drinks. I'm with you wheresthelight it's a constant stream of chaos aversion and near misses. But I am starting to think that perhaps I too am doing it wrong. I see other Mums with blow dried hair, white jeans and organised houses and think maybe it's not that hard and I'm just rubbish at it?????

nicky you are doing it all right!

I grew up with one of those mum's you talk about and I hate her. everything was put above us. she never engaged with us, to the point that she only turned up to 1 school event and then announced half way through me being in stage "Ohh I didn't even know wheres could sing", everyone heard her including me and I was devastated.

the ironing can wait, you will never get this time over with your kids.

I think there's a balance. I know a lot of people don't want their baby to watch TV or use pouches etc for meals, but they can be a useful tool if you feel you need to carve a little bit of time out of your day. I'd also suggest batch cooking and freezing some meals for your baby, so you don't have to cook from scratch each day.

I do remember the period from 6-9 months being quite intensive though. You're weaning, still doing several milk feeds a day, trying to fit in at least 2 naps, and it can feel like you never stop. However it does get a lot easier as they start dropping milk feeds, eating more reliably and having fewer but longer naps. So you can probably look forward to getting time to brush your hair or make and drink a cup of tea before too long!

hello OP

I think it is the bf but your days sound normal.
I'm sure there was a bit of extra time for stuff when our dc were little but I was unable to bf, so it was easy to feed, nap and get on.
Maybe I have rose tinted specs though, it was a long time ago.

Oh so relieved to see this! My dd is 8 months and in the last couple of weeks has learnt to crawl and cruise. I get myself stressed trying to keep on top of housework in the day but mainly because iwant to br able to relax with dh in the evenings.
Its hard. I can totally relate to spending every minute trying to stop them bashing head/eating crap from the floor eg coins from dh's pockets grrrr
Today i left her in cot with toys and cbeebies and managed a 10 min shower. A revelation for me.
This too shall pass!

There's a balance, I do manage to keep my house clean / tidy and on top of chores but I have set times to do things. Mine are 14 months and 25 months. I do stuff like tidy the kitchen up whilst they're eating breakfast, same again at lunch. They play in the lounge with the baby gate on when I Hoover as DS is obsessed with it. I have dogs so hoovering happens every day. I try and get out every day, which is hard ATM as there at no groups on. I know I'll find it much easier when they're a bit older as there are loads of things I want to do with them but can't because they're so young and have no attention span, activities last all of 5 minutes, so sometimes I find I just get on with stuff and let them play, then feel guilty because I'm not playing with them.......honestly we beat ourselves up either way, we think we spend too much or too little time with them it seems.

I mix it up. During the 9am nap I run round getting myself washed & dressed, unload dishwasher, put on washing/ tumble drier & prep DS (8 months) lunch. When he wakes I sit with him, whilst he plays, but let him play independently. I chip in if he needs support. I sit and talk with him over lunch & then post lunchtime nap we play together a bit more, I sing to him, take him out, play, cuddle etc. Post afternoon nap & when I'm waiting for DH I do reading time.

I used a baby walker with DS so he could follow me about while I got things done it was a life saver then once he could crawl and walk it was easier I also used to bring a basket of toys into whatever room I was in and let him play. Now DS is 2.5 and will play in his room while I potter around doing housework and get to watch some tv that's not fireman sam.

I've tried very hard to encourage DS to play alone from when he's been small as my niece was given 100% of everyone's attention from day 1 and can't be left alone even at 7 she just needs to be played with all day long and I didn't want that to happen again. I need my evenings to chill out and spend time with DP so things need to be done in the day not that my house is spotless and everythings done but I tried to spend at least 2 half hour sessions on housework and let DS entertain himself. It may well just be DS's nature but I believe that encouraging him to play independently has been great for both of us.

How about a sling/baby bjorn (carry him around with you while you get things done) or a playpen (put him in the same room as you so he still has company)? I agree that ironing can wait/doesn't need to be done at all, but you might get a bit more of whatever it is you want to do done.

Another one here who gets bog all done during the day (DD 9 months and not even mobile so no excuse!). Have tried leaving her to play independently from the start and have discovery box, jumparoo etc - she is having none of it. I do housework once she's in bed if I can be arsed but quite often have to grin and bear the yelling when I unload the dishwasher during the day. However, I think it unlikely that I will return to work thinking "I wish I'd done more housework" so have given in and accepted living in squalor.