Entertaining toddler and newborn. ..

[Englishgirlinwales22]

Hi
Looking for a bit of advice. I have a 22 month old dd who is very "active" and does not yet have the patience to sit and do activities for very long- she will start drawing and then gets easily bored so will run and play with her building blocks for a few minutes before wanting to read a book etc. This means that my time is usually spent trying to entertain her and keep her away from the tv (the only thing that will keep her attention for more than 10 mins).
The problem I have is that I am currently 38 weeks pregnant and I dont have the energy to be running around after her, organising activities and cleaning them up after 5 minutes and trying to find something else to occupy her time and I am increasingly turning to the tv to provide stimulation. I am starting to worry that I will have even less energy when the new baby arrives and that I am neglecting my daughter.
Does anyone have any experience of this? How do I stimulate my toddler whilst heavily pregnant and then looking after a newborn?

I found being heavily pregnant with a toddler much harder than having a newborn and a toddler so don't worry that things will necessarily go from bad to worse as it may not be the case! My DD is very active too. She was 2.4yo when DS (now 5months) arrived. Stuff that's worked for us is:

• A really good sling for DS. I have a Connecta and I can't reccomend it highly enough. DS has basically lived in it!
• water play in the bathroom, filling the sink with bubbles and bath toys and letting DD splash about while I sit on the loo and watch.
• outdoor chalks for drawing on the paving/ fence/ gate and/ or water for 'painting' the fence outside while I sit on the stop and watch.
• putting the sofa cushions on the floor and letting her jump/ dance to music (while I sit and watch!)
• role play games like Doctors or hairdressers where you are the patient/ having your hair done so you can sit/ lie down and play at the same time!
• getting out and about as much as possible - park, playgroup etc - leaving the house is a faff at first but it's worth it when you're there, especially if you meet friends who can hold the baby while you play.

You are massively pregnant! Honestly, chill out about the TV - if it gives you some rest then embrace it and try not to feel guilty.

Comes in very handy for keeping them still and not drawing on walls when feeding baby.

It's a tiny amount of time in the grand scheme of things. Plenty of opportunity for stimulating play when baby naps!

I have a 5 month old and a 2.3 year old lively boy. I won't say it isn't hard but it's doable.

I rely much more on the TV than I ever would have dreamed but it's a short term survival technique. I won't always rely on it so much when they get older. I also try and play with them together so baby feels included. We somehow manage to get through and my DS won't play for any length of time on his own but wants me to play or to tell me about whatever he is doing. Nor does he nap every day.

Getting out is a must. When I have them both in the buggy I enjoy the opportunity to breathe and walk, walk and breathe!

Just takes patience and accepting that there will be days when you will feel like you are crawling up Everest with bedtime at the top but no one is perfect, especially when sleep deprived!

I have the same age gap. DS1 is now 25 months and DS2 is 3 months. For me it was way harder being pregnant with a toddler than having a newborn and toddler. I use my wrap and mei tai a lot as DS2 gets the constant contact that he needs and I can still play with DS1. I bf and have just mastered feeding in both slings which has made life much easier.

I also find that getting out of the house does us the world of good. I stick baby in the sling and head to the park/soft play/whatever. The toddler then feels like he's getting me to himself and baby is usually asleep. If you have someone to help you on trips out even better. My mum is now retired and regularly joins us for trips out. She sits with the baby while I play with DS1 and run around with him.

On days in I must admit that we have cbeebies on far to much, but needs must at the moment. We've had a few days recently where I've been awake for 20+ hours, cbeebies became my best friend!

I try to make sure that while DS2 is napping DS1 and I do something nice together, at least for one nap anyway, I have to fit housework in somewhere! Today for example we made and decorated some buns, yesterday we played with play doh, the day before we made puddles in the garden, pulled on our wellies and jumped in them. Little things, just to make him feel important.

Generally for times when I'm busy with the baby we use sticker books, colouring, a DVD, the sandpit, car mat etc

This period of time is very short, before long they'll both be running around playing together, that thought makes the tough times very worth it.

She sounds exactly the same as my dd who was 2 when dd2 was born, 6 months ago. The attention span thing is really hard to tackle. Parents who have toddlers who engage with activities for 20 mins or so just don't understand the issue. We have quite a big house over 3 floors and dd just loves running around. It is really hard to get her to stay in one room.

I have to say I don't agree it's easier once the baby comes. I was so tired from night feeds and struggled
with feeding. I used TV more than I wanted to because it was the only thing she would engage with for more than 5 mins. My tips would be-

Get out in the morning and afternoon, preferably at least once involving friends. My dd is always less clingy when there are others to play with.

choose educational TV programmes that you can then talk about and reinforce ideas, eg Alphablocks, numberjacks. Or ones with book tie ins eg Maisy Mouse, as that encourages interest in books, I've found.

vary the toys you have out. We have a play tent that we get out every so often for example and dd plays in it really well, at least for the first day or two!

Childproof as many rooms as you can so dd can wander off on her own and you don't have to drag the baby round the house all the time.

remember dd will gain patience and attention as she gets older so it will get easier!