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Original poster

Do you let your children see you naked?

122 replies

Saturn74 · 17/09/2006 20:51

My MIL made the statement that she thought it was inappropriate for children to see their parents naked once the children were 4 or 5 years old.

This got me thinking, as my DS1 is 10, and merrily comes and sits in the bathroom for a chat whilst I'm in the bath. He's very matter of fact and it has never been an issue.

DS2 is 8, and has reached a "mwah, mwah, look at the boobs!" sort of stage, and I don't feel as comfortable about it with him. Besides which, he wouldn't stay still long enough to sit and have a chat whilst I was in the bath anyway! So he no longer sees me naked - and I think he would be embarrassed to.

So, just wondered how other people felt. Is my MIL right, or does it depend on the personality of the child?

(Just wanted to add that I don't parade up and down naked or anything - I'm in a bath with bubble bath in it!)

OP posts:
Megglevache · 18/09/2006 09:06

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melrose · 18/09/2006 09:14

I have no issue with it and think it envourages openess about your body and taht si good. I still sit and chat to my Mum whaen she is in the bath and she does the same with me. Wandeting around the house naked was always the normin our house and I think that is good. Only change was when ,my StepDad moved in when I was 12, my Mum insisted that I did not see him completely naked as thought it was inappropriate so he would always have pants on if wondering around.

My husband and I both sleep in the nude (is that unusual!) so DS always sees us like that in the mornings!

Incidentally my best friends family were funny about nudity, she had no memory of ever seeing them naked, she was always very body concious and the one to be trying to change behind a towel in the changing rooms, she developed anorexia at 15 and at 30 is still painfully concious of her body. I am not saying there is necessarily a link but makes you think.

kittylette · 18/09/2006 10:31

DS1 is 20 months and sees us naked, we have baths together ect, he doesnt seem bothered at all, doesnt really noticed, though he did when i was heavily pregnant with his lil brother - obviously a big change!

the one thing that does make me laugh is if he sees DH getting out of the bath, getting dressed ect, he laughs at his willy dangling and tries to slap it /grab at it! pmsl

well only stop it when he gets uncomfatable seeing us naked,

suzywong · 18/09/2006 10:34

yes of course I do

In the swimming pool changing room last week, bilingual ds2 - 3yrs - calmly pointed out I had a "Fou-Si See-Foot" - That's Chinese for Beard Bottom.

wabbitt · 18/09/2006 10:47

Oh gawd! I think I probably fit into the 'parading about' catagory but that's usually because my knickers never seem to be in the knicker draw and always somewhere at the bottom of the ironing pile on top of the dryer in the kitchen [naked mummy flitting up and downstairs a regular occurance here I'm afraid]

dd (14) never bothers about my state of undress and has a healthy attitude to being nude around me too
ds is too little to even notice.

wabbitt · 18/09/2006 10:48

lol at 'beard bottom'

sandyballs · 18/09/2006 10:49

Yes, I think they take it in their stride more if they are used to seeing you in the shower and getting dressed. No point in hiding it away as though it was something dirty or embarrassing. It's a chance for natural "spur of the moment" chats about things as well, like this morning when DD (5) was sitting on loo watching me shower, she wanted to know what age she'd get a hairy winkey and boobies. She wondered if she'd just wake up one morning with them

JosephineSmith · 18/09/2006 10:49

As usual, you have all made me fall off the chair laughing, things like big furry bottoms and jelly, arent children so beautifully honest and observant?

My three year old loves being naked, and regualry says "did-did (DH) you are nudies, put your mingling away!" Im sure you can guess what that is.

Cant believe I am telling you all this. ROFL.
No discomfort about bodies or nakedness here, think its good for her to see us all relaxed and normal.

squidgeymiller · 18/09/2006 12:28

we never had an issue with nudity in our house - Mum was always running around naked (for various reasons - usually coz clothes were usually in the washer / ironing pile etc... or she needed to use bathroom to get ready to go out same time as me. My sister was a little more conscious when she hit 15 (ish) but now there are no issues between us again, and we all share hotel / changing rooms etc and don't even think about being naked in front of each other. Same with baths / going to the loo (only for no. 1's though!! ).

My Stepdad never walked around naked though, so never ever saw a mans danglies until my 1st sexual encounter, which was a bit of a shock ! Not sure if that's affected me or not...

Our DD is only 18 weeks so hadn't even thought about the nudity issue yet, although come to think about it, DH has started wearing pyjama bottoms in bed, when he used to always be naked / just wear a T-shirt. I'm not sure if he's bothered by her at this age though, coz he has had showers with her and didn't seem bothered. Weird, you've made me wonder now!!

I think ultimately it's more comfortable for you to be naked around the same sex child as you (ie in the changing rooms etc, not bothered by little girls in communal changing rooms, but other peoples little boys does make me more self-conscious) but I'm not sure if that's just coz I never saw naked men etc... It's probably a healthier environment for kids to grow up seeing both parents naked for at least a while, because at least it makes them realise that there is a difference and that that's normal etc...

PetitFilou1 · 18/09/2006 14:01

You've all cheered me up. We are also a nudey household, I've never had any inhibitions as my mum always wandered about naked in the mornings even when we were teenagers (I am one of three sisters) Never saw my dad's dangly bits though, he kept those hidden and got a bit of a shock when I first saw some! I'm more private when I've got my period now since ds caught me in the shower once and said 'mummy why have you got a string in your bum' 'I want a string in my bum' but other than that we are fairly uninhibited. If either of the children start to get embarrassed in the future then I will re-consider but it will depend on them really.

EmmyLou · 18/09/2006 14:28

I am naked some of the time whan I would rather not be - wiping bottoms and finding the school shirt with no marker pen down the front etc. I could make dd3 sit on loo and wait while I get dressed before wiping bum but fashion indecisiveness/blindness coupled with pile of clothes on bedroom stool that may or may not be dirty mean that she could be sitting there yelling for me for some time, so I wipe her naked instead.

Nakedness just seems to happen when i haven't got round to getting dressed yet. String in bums does remind me that yet again i have failed to dust off that Mooncup.

PeppermintHippo · 18/09/2006 14:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Pinotmum · 18/09/2006 14:33

My ds saw me naked yesterday and said "cows have those boobies" Thanks a bunch! I think I'll cover up from now on.

Twinkie1 · 18/09/2006 14:38

DS and DD see us naked first thing in the morning and if they walk in if we are in the shower or indeed if we shower or bath with them or just when we would be naked if they were not here IYKWIM - will start to cover up if they ever seem embarrassed or mention it but at the moment it is not a problem - I never saw my parents naked though and when I first saw a todger I was shocked - god it was ugly - and I don't want DD to be unaware of either what a male body looks like or think that a female body only looks like those thin women in the shower gel adverts!!

Heartmum2Jamie · 18/09/2006 16:35

Yes and ds's are 5 & 2. I can't see things changing any time soon

Medulla · 18/09/2006 16:37

Yes our children see us naked all the time, also come into the bathroom if we are on the toilet. Don't see that there's a problem really. DD informed me the other day she thought I was a little bit fat around the edges - she's only 3!!!

bev1e · 18/09/2006 18:47

Still share baths with mine (eldest is 11). Will take my cue from the children as to when I should start covering up.

southeastastra · 18/09/2006 18:58

how do you fit in a bath with an 11 year old?

lockets · 18/09/2006 18:58

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Blu · 18/09/2006 19:01

Relaxed unclothed family here.

Can think of no good reason to introduce coyness about simple nakedness. But will respect DS's sensibilities when puberty looms!

bev1e · 18/09/2006 19:15

Southeastastra, we must have a big bath cos I can get the 3 children in plus myself without a problem (not lying down but all sat up). We do all jump up and run out when DH gets in (he is rather larger!!

Overrun · 18/09/2006 19:49

Peppermint, that is awful, what a ridiculous book

fourboys · 18/09/2006 20:04

I treat nakedness for what it is, just me with no clothes on.... dh is the same. We have four sons aged 2-9yrs and with no sister I feel its important they are aware of the female body..... If I covered up god knows what they would think was under the cloth!! Truthfully though, Its not an issue for me and so far has'nt been for them, so when they do feel uncomfortable they can avoid my naked times rather than me obviously cover up!

1Baby1Bump · 18/09/2006 20:12

we all bathed with mum till we didnt want to anymore and she wouldnt cover up if we walked in etc.
only ever saw dad by accident though- he was always covered.
we have 2 boys, only young at 1 year and 1 week and i wont be/dont cover up.
ds1 is interested in my bits and points and laughs but once i tell him 'no it's mummy's' he forgets till next time i get undressed.
as fourboys says, they wont have a sister (i'm not doing it again!) so i think they should see me.

Californifrau · 18/09/2006 20:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.