Desperate for help getting 5mo to sleep

[Rachel153]

Please help, I'm going nuts :(
My 5mo dd will not settle (with or without help) day or night - she ends up falling asleep after sobbing away sometimes for hours and it's really getting me down. we've had about 6 weeks of it now and it's getting worse.
I feel like I've tried everything and have done my best to stick at being consistent but she's not having any of it.
Also doesn't help that I have ME so I'm unable to just take her out for a walk or drive to get her to sleep.
I'm trying to get her used to sleeping in the cot (obv at bedtime but also for one of her naps in the day) but she just won't have it.
Has anyone else had this problem and found a way to make it better?
My dd's character is very alert, very determined and pretty independant. She does have a bit of reflux and has suffered a great deal with trapped wind but I'm sure it's not always to do with being uncomfortable because sometimes when I first put her down she's fine until she knows she's meant to be sleeping and I'm not going to pick her up... she gets in such a state :(

Today has been the worst ever-I even forced myself to go for a walk with her in the hope it would help get her off to sleep but she just screamed the whole time we were out and was fine when we got home. She eventually fell asleep from exhaustion on a feed but woke up the minute I put her down.
I'm on the verge of a meltdown

Hugs from me, I know how hard it can be having a lo like that. My first thought is to check it's not reflux that's causing it. Is she on anything for it??
I know you say sometimes you can put her down and shes fine, it maybe silent reflux that works it's way up the longer she's lieing down. Id have a chat with your Hv or gp to check it out.

I would work on bedtimes first and don't be too fussed about where she sleeps during naps. It's very common for los to refuse to have naps in cots 2 out of 3 of mine did. Good luck

Poor you, it is tough. She may just be too little for it, though worth trying the 'ideal' routine once a week or so to see if she's ready.
Until DS was about 7-8 months he wouldn't settle. He had reflux. We would do bedtime routine at 7ish and then DH or I had him in a sling, where he would sleep til a dream feed then bed at 11ish in a co-sleeper cot. Might a sling in the evening work for you?
Whatever you do now isn't forever, and I found it best to try and go with the flow a bit with sleep as forcing things before he was ready only led to problems.

Also, I found the 'sleep' section on MN really helpful and supportive

When my dd was this age she'd only sleep on me after a feed or she would sleep while out in the pram, it's really frustrating and must be very tiring for you with me as well. Could you try rocking your lo in a bouncy chair or her pushchair for naps? I agree with the pp who said that lo may not want to nap in the cot, my dd is only just doing that now and she's 17 months.

Hi there,

We had a hell of a time with our Jack during teething. At night (and only at night) he would scream as if he was actually being tortured. We are lucky that a close family friend runs a baby sleep consultancy and she sorted it out pretty quickly. The main problem was how we were reacting to the crying. She mainly just changed little things like how we spoke to our son when putting him down and how long we took before attending to his screaming. Let me know if you need their details.

Yes please that might be really helpful!
Dd is now on gaviscon and I've put her on formula and got some anti colic bottles so hoping to erase wind as a reason for her being so unsettled!
Tonight has been the calmest in a long time-she had a late nap in the lounge after conking out finally during a feed so we did bedtime routine once we could see her starting to get a bit tired. She fell asleep right after a big feed with minimal wind (hopefully thanks to the new bottles) and didn't stir or put up a fight when transferring her to cot.

I shall try to go with the flow a bit more and hope she chills out a bit!