Can we start a mnet movement to ban party bags?

[bubble99]

Back in the dark ages, when I was a girl, we sometimes got an extra piece of birthday cake in a paper napkin to take home.

When did this 'party bag' nonsense start? From what I can see most of it is (expensive) junk and, what offends me more, is that the guests look for it.

Am I an old skinflint/curmudgeon? No honest answers required.

FGS, most parents have already forked-out for the food and the makeover/clown/entertainer/ unicycling jugglers, as it is. Isn't that enough?

Love party bags - keep them!

But flumpy - that's all well and good and very worthy and it was good that the parents were "relieved" but party bags are NOT for the parents they're for the children.

I have to disagree with Noseymum's last paragraph.

"Also in my day you would always send a thank you note to the people who brought you a present. These days people haven't go the manners to ensure that their kids do this. It's so rude."

Well, I certainly make my DSs (5 and 7) sit down and write thank you notes. In fact, they don't open another present until they've written the thank you for the one before. DSs have also received thank you notes so I'm not the only one.

"The only reason kids 'expect' party bags (IMO) is because their parents have 'taught' them to!!!!"

Er, no. It's not their parents at all but other parents. It's not their parents who give them a party bag at the end of a party is it?

But I really can't believe you all get so het up about partybags! It's hilarious when you think about it. If you don't like them, don't do them. Simple.

it's not simple though is it?

You might feel strongly about the use of party bags but do you want your child to be known as the one who's parties aren't worth going to cos you don't get anything? It's an age old problem - peer pressure - and it is parents (in a global sense) who started the tradition, it certainly wasn't a childs idea!

Soup Dragon

Maybe you get your kids to do it, but my lo has been to parties and not been given a thank you note!

I see a lot of kids these days who don't say please and thank you. The only reason they don't is because they haven't been taught to.

I'm with those of you who don't like party bags - the party itself should be the treat, not the bag full of plastic. That said, I've never been brave enough not to give something..

Usually give a book (buy sets from places like The Works or The Book People), a balloon (decoration from the party), and a piece of cake. Had a few comments this year that it was much nicer than lots of bits of plastic

I hate throwing things away that could be used again, so save any party bags my DDs have been given (unless they're named), and used those this year. Previously I've wrapped things in tissue / shiny paper. I also save / confiscate lots of the random plastic that they've been given - some things that they've played with briefly, some things which come out of the bag, dropped, and forgotten. Had enough to put in our party bags this year (35 guests), but decided not to, as I don't really like them.

Hopefully one day DD1 (aged 4) will get excited about a party and not mention "I might get a party bag". She has been taught not to mention or ask for one when at the party at least.

Most people do do thankyous - rare not to get one.

I became a first time mum in my 40's so birthday parties were a bit of an eye-opener to me, not to mention the business of party bags! I'm not a big fan of them, but my mum told me she used to do them when I was a kid!

As for the contents - children don't have any idea of value, and are usually happy with sweets. It should be personal choice, but you have to be brave not to do it! Perhaps we should look to ourselves as to where the paranoia over party bags came from!

have just dont mine for out party tomroorw

This whole party thing can get really out of hand and its a real dilemma trying to make your child feel special without getting caught up in the how to top the bouncy castle, fireater and party bag like Oscar party goodie bag, circuit!! - i am a great believer in parties at home, fun food and games - so what if there's no entertainer - your child will be remembered for the cool party where the parents joined in (- although this is age dependent of course!)I am so proud of my daughter this year - she will be 7 and we decided that instead of all her friends each bringing a present that they all club together and buy just one thing - no more than 2 euros a head and with the rest of the money, that would normally be spent on plastic (which usually gives the mum lots of headaches about what to buy for someone elses child)that we donate the money to a local animal rescue centre. Part of her birthday party will be a trip with her friends to the centre to give the cheque and get lots of praise for being so kind - the donation from each child will probably be enough to get a membership for a year from the centre. She is totally into the idea and the centre thinks its great too.(Of course all the family will give her presents as usual.) As for party bags, we are going to try (this is the theory anyway!!)to print a picture of each child at the party and put them in a cheap ikea frame as a reminder of their day. In my day you left the party with a piece of cake wrapped in a napkin which was actually so that your mum could taste and criticise someone elses baking prowess, ha! I think at the end of the day, children will be happy with a special day without it being grandiose. All of the mums i have spoken to about the plans are delighted that there is going to be just one present to buy - especially as there are so many children in the class - throughout the year the cost really mounts up and above all i want my children to appreciate what they are given, not how much stuff they accumulate.

Make a stand - I resent people expecting me to spend my hard earnt money and so I don't do it. Some parents are as bad as the kids, grabbing what ever they can get out of others.
If the kiddies received an invite to the party, then they should think themselves lucky and if they get a piece of birthday cake to take home with them then they are extremely lucky and should be taught by the parents to appreciate things more!!! and yes they will be playing games like pass the parcel and pin the tail on the dog...Ooops ..donkey!

I have ds2s party tomorrow and have to go out and trawl for party bag stuff today. I may just cop out though and get those bags that are filled already as there's only 7 kids coming?

Belgimum, what a fantastic idea! DS1 would go for this so I think I'll suggest it to him this year. I can put a note on the invitations. He's mad on dogs so I may suggest the local rescue centre. Cheers for that.

Hi, I hate party bags and always end up chucking most of the stuff. I do them because at hte first party for dd I didn't, and at least 4 of the kids complained directly to me at going home time and I got some really nasty looks from quite a few of hte parents (who then never spoke to me again)!

Cassoulet, that's awful!

Thanks it was awful.

Sorry for delay, am being chased round computer by very very large spider and can't find a cat to come eat it!!

we've moved from that ghastly suburb to the country now and the people are much nicer. But I still do party bags - maybe I'll have the guts not to now!

Leave the spider, it will eat flies for you!

I've got stuff for flies which doesn't run around horriby and frighten me! I keep cats for getting the spiders - what use are they otherwise? I've just had to de-flea them both and the whole house and now they won't even rouse themselves for a lovely running biscuit! They are such ungrateful creatures, just lie about being warm and purry, eat the food, demand the stroking and tickling ... Oh I'm going to be one of mine in my next life.

And another thing about cats! (Sorry for hi-jack) they bring in frogs and worms and birds in hte middle of the night and I have to get out of bed and catch them and put hte poor things back in the garden.

Actually, bright idea! Perhaps I could use the frogs etc for the party bags next year!

Our ex-cat was a cute, fluffy one-eyed hunter - voles, baby blue tits, baby rabbits...... give me a nice spider anyday! (instead of the cat, that is!) The corpses I can certainly do without.

Truthfully I adore my cats and wouldn't be without them. But I still think they could actually contribute to the household by providing party bags gifts.

MN is surreal at times, B99 starts a thread about party bags, we all wade in and seven days later, it has turned into a thread about cats, spiders and whether cats should contribute to party bags.

i agree party bags are really hard - damned if you do and damned if you odn't. some of my friends have started giving a 'big' present to eachchild at the end but that's turned into a big bag of haribos which I don't like (too much sugar all at once = nightmare. But the friends of my kids do give lovely presents so it seems nice to give something back - but of course the party itself costs a fortune. our idea this year (for 7 year old) was 7 friends to the cineworld kids club (£1 a head bought day before for specific film out of choice of 3) and then pizza hut straight after for £2,49 buffet deal. Then relied on the freebies given by pizzahut which included a balloon. Told my daughter I wasn't allowed to put anything in them!!

Aah, yes, let's start putting furballs in party bags - that would put an end to them once and for all!

Just survived my 5 year olds party, the kids got a book each - buy in bulk from the Book People and it works out the same or cheaper. The parents are certainly happier, not sure if the kids are

Ban the Bag!

and have all the sweets and cake and fun you want at the party

and teach your children to be grateful for what they are given and gracious in response.