Stupid question about milk

[ZebraZeebra]

When do they stop needing that last bedtime milk as part of food, as oppose to comfort?

Just wondering really - DS is 15 months, has a BF in the morning and bedtime, fully eating lots of solids throughout the day, and I've not plans to wean him off BM jut yet. But I just wondered when you stop, why you stop etc. Or even with formula really - just the concept of when you stop that last "milk feed"?

Interested OP. DD is 16 months and still has a 6oz bottle of cows milk before bed.

Do you replace it with a cup of milk and a 'snack' at some point? 18 months?

I've no idea! It's just occurred to me - when do they stop "needing" that last milk as part of food, and not just something comforting, nice to have etc.

He has plenty of goats milk yoghurt - allergies mean we can't give him cow's milk or pretty much any milk substitute. So I've just carried on BFing. But it just occurred to me I've really no idea about that last feed of the day.

DS is 23 months and hasn't had a bedtime bottle since he was 15months when he switched to a cup.

We switched to a cup of milk with a snack in the afternoon around 3-4months ago as I felt he was using his milk as a delaying tactic at bedtime and nursing it for ages so he could stay up later.

He hasn't complained about the change and goes to bed more easily without it.

So he has a cup of milk - cow's milk or formula? - in the afternoon, and nothing at bedtime? So I guess teatime/supper is the last meal of the day then? Sorry to interrogate you - just getting my head round this!

Children need milk until the age of 2ish - either breastmilk or animal milk. After that you can probably drop milk so long as you ensure enough fat and calcium in their diet.

Whether they have milk at bedtime or lunchtime is just personal preference though.

I don't think there is a set age that will work for every baby. You just have to see what you think will work with your baby and if they give you any clues they're ready to move onto the next stage then you try it and if it works you stick with and if it doesn't you do something else.

We're all just winging it!

There's a lovely book called 'how weaning happens' that talks thru weaning from bf at 1yr, 2yrs, 3yrs, 4yrs etc.... Includes mother led weaning and child lead weaning. Both my DD's dropped their night feed before their morning feed... around 3-4 yrs. it worked for us, not suggesting you feed for years, but it does happen. Your local LLL group may have toddler mtgs where you could go. Many mums find themselves surprised at 'still' bf after 1st birthday and have lots of questions. It would totally fine to ring an LLL leader and have a chat. Local group details on their LLL GB website

dd1 dropped hers at about 11mo. still bf morning and post nap at age 2. also has cows milk in a cup with breakfast most days and occasionally another meal.

she seemed to be taking less and less so I just stopped offering it and dh started putting her into bed while l lay on the sofa feeling knackered in early pregnancy

Sorry Zebra, just saw your question.

He just has "blue milk" now in the afternoon and no bedtime milk unless he asks for it which is rare.

He was ebf until 6 months when we introduced formula & started mixed feeding but he switched onto cows milk at 12months.

I think it does just depend on what suits you & your child though. My DS has friends of the same age who still have a morning and evening bottle as it suits them.

I'm a great believer in going with your instinct or "winging it"!

I thought when I introduced mixed feeding that I would keep the bedtime bf for the longest but in the end that was the first one to go.

I had also thought he would drop the morning feed first as it wouldn't be convenient when I went back to work but we ended up continuing that one until he was 14 months old which was much longer than I ever thought I would bf for.

So I suppose what I'm saying is to try what you think will work but not to be surprised if you end up doing something completely different in the end!

I weaned off the breast at about 26 months (he more or less self-weaned, but it was brought about by my drop in supply (he was bedtime feed only from about 24 months) which meant he wasn't getting the milk he wanted at bedtime so would top up with 'blue' milk).

Even now at 4 years old, he usually still asks for a cup of milk at bedtime (clearly comfort/routine, rather than nutritional requirement).

However, I'm not sure when it becomes comfort only, when he stopped bfeeding, he was still wanting that milk at bedtime, its just that I was no longer enough, so he took the blue milk instead (we had many months of him bfeeding from me then having a blue milk top up). We started offering him blue milk at bedtime after he was about 16 months so that I could go out for a night (we never gate him a bottle) DH offered him it the first time and he took a sippy cup of milk no problem, so at 18 months we attended a wedding and my sister put him to bed with a sippy cup of blue milk and he was also fine.

Between 2 and 3.5yrs we had many nights when he would drain his first cup of milk then ask for another and finish that too - so for him, there was still some hunger/thirst issue being addressed on some nights (sometimes he'd ask for water instead).

My dd is 15 months. She has a beaker of cows milk before bed, we are both still happy with that so I feel no rush to cut it out.

Doesn't milk have something in it that makes you sleepy?

I may be unusual but DD has never had a bottle 'before bed'. When I weaned her the guidelines were milk before food to make sure she had her milk quota so it always been milk, dinner with water then bed (or on the odd days of early dinner then dinner with water, milk, bed). We weaned her from 6 ish months. She has always made it clear when she is hungry!

She is now approaching 17 months and has a sippy cup of cows milk when she wakes up, breakfast, lunch (usually 11:30/12 due to nap), afternoon snack (if she wants it), sippy cup of cows milk at 5ish (and snack if she wants it), dinner at 6:30/7,

As others have said, all mini's are different - do what feels right for you!

All interesting information, thank you!

I don't know why but I just have it in my head they're supposed to have milk before bed. At first when DS was tiny, it was obvious as he was feeding every two hours. Then as he got older, it became the bedtime routine - cuddles, mobile, story, BF. Lately I've got to wondering if it's "needed" not just from a comfort perspective but from a nutritional perspective. He has his dinner around 5.30, and is in bed by 7. His allergies really restrict any simple supper we could make - crumpets, porridge etc - and they really restrict any kind of milk alternative. So a BF is simple and easy to do. I've tried warm bananas and stuff but he hates them like that. Maybe just a banana will suffice.

My DD is 15 months and has a cup of milk in the morning and evening, about 5-6oz each time. I'm not sure she nutritionally needs both of these as she is a good eater, but she likes it and it's good for her. The evening one is part of our routine so I don't think she'll drop it anytime soon. I am happy with her drinking both until she doesn't want to anymore - I drank milk before bed until I was about 4.

At a guess around 2 when they should have. However mine both have a cup I warm milk in the eve before bathtime still eldest is 4, and I still have a cup of hot milk myself before bed :). It's supposed to help melatonin produce and settle you to sleep

My DS is 7 and still often has a glass of milk at bedtime. I remember as a child always having a glass of milk and a biscuit just before bed. DS doesn't get the biscuit. We have dinner around 5.30-6pm and he goes to bed at 7.20.

But that must be habitual/comfort right, Fuzzymum?

Neither of my children wanted a bedtimes drink of milk when they gave up bottles at 12 months. Dd hasn't drunk milk for 3 years now and ds does like it but doesn't drink it at bedtime, he has a carton at school.