Five-year-old with aggressive tantrums - empathy and advice needed!

[frustratedsuperhero]

My lovely nephew is acting out at the moment and having aggressive meltdowns, yelling, hitting etc. My brother and sister-in-law feeling pretty crap about it. I wondered if you could help cheer them up, either with some of your own experiences (so they don't feel alone) or with recommendations for properly useful books.

I think they're running on empty right now, so any compassionate wisdom would be massively appreciated!

My 4.5 yr old ds is in reception and we have the most horrible meltdowns mon -fri during term time bcos he doesn't want to go to school he also has moderate hearing loss in both ears from glue ear so school is a real struggle for him atm hopefully once he's had his op (grommet insertion tonsil&ademoidectomy ) he will start to feel better.

Do they know what is causing the tantrums? There's a book called how to talk so kids will listen and how to listen so kids will talk it has been so helpful with my older 2 and no doubt once dd hits terrible twos I'll b going back to it.