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Parenting

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Original poster

Facebook - Am I being a prude?

10 replies

lydem · 04/01/2014 14:28

My daughter is only 10 years old and she has informed me that she has a Facebook site.

I'm not quite sure how to react, at first I instantly thought she should delete it, but now I'm not so sure. I'm not adverse to her using the internet, I completely trust her and we have safety precautions in place but I do just feel like 10 is awfully young! Has anyone had experience with this? Is it just a part of growing up or is it actually dangerous for her to be on social media so young!? Has anyone had any bad experiences?

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cece · 04/01/2014 14:33

It seems fairly common these days. However, I have told my DC they can't have one till the are 13 and I have explained why. Mainly for their own protection.

I do check occasionally to see if she has set one up and haven't found her yet.

desperateforaholiday · 04/01/2014 14:37

Have you got parental settings on the computer? 10 I think is too young for a fb account, she would also have had to use a fake date of birth to set it up.

RRudolphR · 04/01/2014 14:37

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Fairylea · 04/01/2014 14:37

I have an 11 year old dd (year 6) and I think under 13 is far too young for Facebook. It's too open and unless they have a real handle of privacy settings (which even many adults don't) I think they are leaving themselves wide open to all kinds of unwanted attention and possible bullying.

Isn't the age limit for Facebook 13 anyway? Or maybe I'm wrong.

Dd is allowed access to the Internet on a pc in the same room as us. I don't stand over her shoulder at all but if she was up to something dodgy I'd know about it. She is allowed to email friends (I have passwords for her email and though I don't ever check in theory she knows I could) and I have specifically told her never to give her email address to anyone unless it's a friend from school that she actually knows.

I wouldn't be happy about her having a Facebook account at all.

At the very least I'd make sure she gives you her password and inform her that you will keep an eye on it for her as there are a lot of weirdos about

WorraLiberty · 04/01/2014 14:39

You completely trust her and yet she has broken that trust by opening an account on FB (for which she needs to be 13yrs old).

I'm not against children having FB accounts per se, but you need to open it for her, make it quite clear she's not to change the log in details (so you can keep an eye out) and that she's not to friend anyone she doesn't know.

Some kids just like the games on there and some like to keep in touch with friends when they change schools/go to senior school.

But too many adults...even with FB accounts of their own, don't understand he privacy settings. I fail to see how their children can be kept safe by them.

Original poster

lydem · 04/01/2014 14:40

I have made her give me all her passwords so I can see what she is doing (not alot to be honest) but do you think I should just delete it all together? I do sometimes find it staggering how much she knows about the internet and technology!

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WorraLiberty · 04/01/2014 14:43

When you say you find it staggering, is that because you know very little about the internet and technology yourself?

I only ask because it shouldn't be too much of a shock for you, considering nursery schools have computers and IT is a very important subject all through school.

But as parents we can sometimes find it all a bit confusing.

exexpat · 04/01/2014 14:46

If you delete it, she will probably just start another one - she obviously knows how - and won't tell you about it. Better to let her keep this one that you know about.

I'd make sure all her privacy settings are watertight (everything friends-only, not searchable etc - if you don't do facebook, get someone you know who is familiar with how it works to check for you), and make sure you have the passwords so you can check everything regularly, including private messages.

DS has had a facebook account since he was ten - nearly everyone in his year 6 class set one up as a way to keep in touch when they were all scattering to separate secondary schools; he also used it to keep in touch with friends and family overseas. We've never had any problems with it, though from what I hear from friends/read on here, girls may be more likely to post inappropriate pictures or have problems with online bullying, so you need to keep a close eye on it.

Groovee · 04/01/2014 14:50

The fact she set it up without asking would be a huge thing for me. It would get deleted.

Original poster

lydem · 04/01/2014 14:51

Thanks exexpat, it's nice to hear something positive! I have checked all the settings apart from non searchable, I will change that now!

No WorraLiberty, I am quite tech savvy to be honest, I mean it more in the sense of how quickly she picks digital things up without having to be taught. It's just interesting the difference between generations.

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