5yo with zero interest in reading - and i'm not helping...

[TeaKeepsMeSane]

Looking for a bit of reassurance and some mild castigation.

My 5yo DD is not interested in learning to read. She can sound out most letters. But hasn't memorised the most basic of reception keywords 'and', 'the' etc. And when faced with a book will just guess her way through it and refuse to acknowledge there are words on the page. Do you think she'll just get it one day?

And it makes me so frustrated reading with her that i end up getting grumpy - which is not helpful. Would it be better just to leave it for a long while/ till i get a grip?

Thanks for any wisdom

I would go back to basics with picture books and describing what's going on so you can both enjoy the "reading"time you spend together.
Something my dd enjoyed was cards with basic words turned over and picking one at a time and seeing how many she could read. Doing this every other night in her first term of school worked for us as her sisters were in bed and we sat on her bed doing it. Also make sure you read to her - and try to find books that she enjoys. Not all enjoy fiction.

Agree with princess - Read to her - find a set of stories that she loves and read them to her regularly - that way she has something to WANT to learn to read.

Yes to the picture books - discuss the pictures and make up different stories to go with the pictures.

Think about making some spelling games out of things she likes - I made one out of Thomas the Tank Engine for one of my pupils. He had all the letters he needed and then needed to put the letters together to make the names of all the engines.

If you centre it around things she likes, she has more incentive to go along with you and if she sees you reading for fun, chances are she'll want to be like you...

She sounds like one of my dtb's. We have read to them both since they were 8 days old. And have a house full of books, plus dh & i are always reading. He told me he doesn't want to learn to read because he likes me reading to him! What has been helping is a set of phonics books we got from the book people. For some reason he seems to connect with these more than the school ones. Oh and bribery . (A marble for every book read. 20 marbles means a treat)

lovesummer - that's lovely - you clearly do a good job reading stories. And lets be honest, kids books are FANTASTIC, but they're even better if you've got someone who's good at reading them to read them too you. Makes them come alive.

can you tell i love m storytime session at work?

oh, and for what it's worth - i'd make the most of it - the time will come when he doesn't want you to read to him anymore and that phase in your life will be over

We do an every other system, so with a list of keywords, I read one, he reads second word, I say what third word is, etc.

Can do same with a reading book, he does page 1, I do page 2, he does pg 3.

Or even, he has to do 2 pages of his reading book and then I read him bedtime stories.

Math I try to do little oral exercises, also good games online.

She's only 5! Kids develop at different paces - she'll figure it all out when it all goes 'ping' in her brain at the right time. I'm talking from experience - I had terrible parent/teacher meetings for 2 years when I was told how 'behind' my LO was with reading/writing and how I need to do extra work at home with him and blah, blah, blah (which I promptly ignored, and allowed him to play out and have stories read to him instead).

Then, suddenly, when he was ready, it all came together and now he's advanced in reading and holding his age grade for writing.

If you're reading to her every day, and school is working with her too, it will come together. Don't worry so much about getting her to read (even though school can nag about this). Enjoy reading time by reading to her - follow the words on the page with your finger, and sometimes, if there's a harder word, sound it out. Talk about what might happen, who her favourite character is, how she would have made the ending different, which picture in the book was best - just engage and take the pressure off her.

Give her until she's at least 7 before you start worrying about this - they're so ickle when they go to school, and I wonder if some of them are ready for all this reading and writing business!

I would really try not to worry to much, they all get there eventually. My DD1 was USELESS at reading, all through reception we'd be like C... A... T... what does that spell and resolutely the answer would be DOG! I got v grumpy about it, not least because my niece (same age) was already capable of reading the Sunday Times (really!) making both DD1 and I feel a bit hopeless. DD1 didn't really learn to read until Yr2. It fell into place almost instantaneously, one day she couldn't read, the next she could, it was bizarre and now, yr 3 she is the most amazing book worm, read literally everything, her expression and understanding are amazing and school have her on G&T list for her literacy. My mother then (rather belatedly after all the worry I had gone through) pointed out that I was also a late reader (7 ish), but since I went on to read English Lit at Cambridge I guess it didn't have any long term effect!! I'd say to back off a bit and keep reading to her without expecting too much and try and interest her again in 6 months or so.

Thank you all. You talk absolute sense and I know you're right. I will stop fretting about it and try and remember to make it fun.

Two things are important- read to her loads- and without expecting her to read at al, so she associates books with pleasure, not struggle. And make sure she sees people reading for pleasure. You and your dp should have a book on the go all the time, so should any older siblings. Make reading seem like a desirable thing to do, something you and her dad look forward to. She'll get there, I promise!

My ds age 5 is the same. We've been reading together regularly since the day he was born, have loads of books in the house, read to him every day but to try and get him interested in actually learning to read himself is not working. I've tried everything.

The teacher has raised her concerns and but I'm more chilled about it now. He will read when he's ready. He is an intelligent child and I'm not going to put him under any pressure. He's also another one that guesses the words. I once showed him the word J.E.T and sounded it out veeeerrrry sloooowly and asked him what it said. He answered "aeroplane" .

I think all you can do is try your best, try not to get annoyed or frustrated with them and just be encouraging. It will all pong into place one day. It's hard when I hear about his peers who have a reading level of a year 2 child etc but I try not to compare.

Actually this week is the first week we've actually had a proper Oxford Reading Tree reading book home whereas his classmates started on them six months ago.

As I said above, along with seeker if she sees other people reading for fun she will pick up on it. I ALWAYS have a book on the go.
Having said that though, dh was brought up to read books and now won't touch them unless it's his football stats thing or a magazine oe the bloody sun so you can bring a horse to water.....

She may turn out to simply not be a reader --doesn't mean you can't try though - books are far far better than films.

I just tell the kids I work with that films made of books are just someone elses interpretation of the book. I do like watching the films though - i like to see how different the picture in my head is to what is on screen. I pictured many things in Harry Potter differently.

She seems v young for you to be so worried about it. Would try and step back,continue reading to her, etc