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Original poster

DS won't sleep anywhere but on me!

24 replies

babyperks · 13/02/2013 07:53

He's 4wo today, and he used to be brilliant for sleeping in his crib and carry cot. But over the last week or so he just doesn't want to sleep in either. He's not too bad in the carry cot in the day but its just the crib I'm having troubles with.
On Monday he was also diagnosed with reflux. I've tried putting a wedge in his crib but it seemed he didn't like it. I should try it again, but after numerous attempts of trying to settle him, and trying to survive on a tiny amount of sleep, I just get impatient and put him on me.

Someone please help, I need to sleep without a baby on my chest! I just don't know what to do... Sad

TIA x

OP posts:
Forgetfulmog · 13/02/2013 08:01

Dd is 22 weeks & still sleeps on me Shock sorry. Sometimes you just have to do anything to ensure you both get some sleep. If he has reflux then he will be looking for comfort & so will want to be close to his mummy. He's v young so I wouldn't worry about it, he will go in his own cot when he's ready. Don't feel pressured by friends or family - every baby is different. Smile

Lynned · 13/02/2013 08:02

You have my sympathy, my Ds did that too! Don't know what the answer is, maybe he's cold, it's very cold at night at the moment. My Ds is still very clingy, and he's 11!

Forgetfulmog · 13/02/2013 08:03

Also, is he ebf? Sometimes dairy can cause reflux - dd had reflux, but it disappeared v quickly once I gave up dairy.

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noblegiraffe · 13/02/2013 08:07

Have you tried warming the blankets and mattress before putting him down? I used to feed DS with my feet in his basket, sitting on his blanket. Sometimes it helped. Also shove a muslin down your top and put that in the basket so it smells of you.

Original poster
babyperks · 13/02/2013 09:27

Thanks everyone's your responses. I'm not breast feeding no, I tried and tried but it was on use. I keep meaning to buy a hot water bottle but keep forgetting, I try and warm the bedroom up as much as a can afford bed time, but doesn't seem to work! I do love the extra cuddles I get from him, but I'm longing to just curl up under my quilt and get nice a comfy. I'm so worried he's going to get ridiculously clingy as its going to be so difficult to leave him with relatives over night and during the day because all he wants is his mummy. I always swore I would never let that happen...

OP posts:
Charlieburger · 13/02/2013 13:42

I had a similar problem but this sleeping bag help load. www.puckababy.co.uk/en/content/6-restlessness-sleeping. SH still growns but she feels much more snuggle and can wriggle less.

Jojay · 13/02/2013 13:47

Swaddling can help, but if he's uncomfortable with reflux, nothing in the world is going to work, until he's pain free.

Is he on meds for reflux?

Please don't think that his behaviour at 4 wks old is indicative of what he will be like in the future. He's sooo tiny, and every instinct he has is telling him to stay close to you. It's much easier to go with it than to fight it, or try to 'train' him out of it.

Scrumptiousboy · 13/02/2013 16:05

Mine did that too for about a week. Still wont go down during the day. I do use a hot water bottle and a used t-shirt as sheet to give the illusion if sleeping on mummy but for a while that made no difference. Mine has colic and mild reflux. All they want is comfort from mummy and who are we to deny them. He will grow out of it when he's ready. In the meantime get a sling so you can do stuff during the day and ask daddy to wear your t-shirt (milky one) so you can do it in shifts. Or if co-sleeping is an option, have a loom at how do to do that safely.look after yourself. It will pass.

SquidgersMummy · 13/02/2013 17:23

My dd still sleeps on me for all naps unless in car or pram (27wks!). (We go out a lot Wink). Your little chap is tiny. He prob just wants to be close. Reflux must be horrible. A cot attached to bed side car fashion, or cosleeping - safely - might help as you could roll onto your side so you're face to face when he drops off. It prob wont last forever...and then of course you'll really miss it even though you think you won't Smile

Original poster
babyperks · 13/02/2013 22:28

Thanks everyone for replying. I have been told a few times that it's not up until about 4 months that they start to remember that if they do/make a certain noise then mummy will do this/that. I am loving the cuddles but worried I'm just going to make things more difficult for myself with getting him back in the crib again. I think I just forget that he's still so small and new to this world... I'm not too convinced anymore that if has reflux either. Doctor hasn't even seen him, has just said "yep he's got reflux". He's sick yes, but not projectile, and not after every feed. He doesn't cry on his feeds, only when he's hungry/tired/bored/lonely/needs his nappy changed/uncomfortable. Just like any other baby. He cries when he poos, and me saying this has given me the reflux diagnosis from the doctor. It's so hard, I wish they could tell you what's wrong! Sad

OP posts:
KatieLily12 · 13/02/2013 22:41

Sounds like my little love. You can have silent reflux which is a bit more tricky to put your finger on as there's not as much vomiting.

Most reflux babies like sleeping on your chest. At 14 weeks we're back to chest sleeping after I managed to get her to lie next to me at night and for some naps. She also sleeps in a sling but that's it.

Please ignore anyone telling you that they will be clingy in later life- complete rubbish. While you're trapped under a 4 WO look up area hmrnt parenting and feel good about the love your baby is getting. Well done for listening to your baby!

Younglee · 13/02/2013 22:52

We use to have a similar problem with our youngest Theo but luckily he just gradually grew out of it.

Sleep issues seem to be very up and down in our household with 3 yr old Rose and Theo who is now 1, I've wrote a short post about recent problems here dadwithtwokids.wordpress.com/2013/02/13/sleeping-problems/

lola88 · 13/02/2013 23:02

I wouldn't worry just now see how it goes with the reflux then once thats under control work on the sleeping, i was very anti co sleeping but DS was such bad sleeper he ends up in with us most nights it used to be from his first feed but now it's only from 6am he just seems to have grown out of it slowly. I always start him off in his wn bed though so he is happy in it and it's not strange for him.

He's just turned 1 a couple of weeks ago and is not clingy at all his new favourite thing is leaving with people as soon as anyone puts thier jackets on he toddles over too them waves bye bye to me and points out the window saying 'car' so i don't think sleeping with me has done any harm except maybe he's too secure that i'll always be here lol

ifso · 13/02/2013 23:11

Just wanted to add that the heat from you will transfer to your little newborn and ease his reflux - a mum with a daughter poorly with stomach issues age 7 since birth told me this skin on skin is the best soother for her

Enjoy it - he needs you & your warmth like a kitten!

  • nest with him with a pile of books mags beside you and cushions blankets for you. Powernaps will see you through until he grows out of it
KatieLily12 · 14/02/2013 02:42

attachment parenting

Original poster
babyperks · 14/02/2013 04:59

Lola88: Your comment about DS waving bye and saying 'car' when guests put their coats on, brought a smile to my face. That is just too cute!

Thanks all for your advice. I've now come to realise that if he wants a cuddle then let him have one, would hate him to feel like mummy has left him or the pie doesn't care. I put him down tonight at 10.45pm and he woke up at 4.05 for his feed, so I'm glad I've been able to get 5 hours sleep. Now time to attempt to put him down again, but if he doesn't want to, then I'm more than happy to have more cuddles Grin

OP posts:
Original poster
babyperks · 14/02/2013 05:00

Ha, the pie doesn't care was meant to say 'that she doesn't care!' Blush

OP posts:
CatsRule · 14/02/2013 23:15

My ds still often sleeps on dh or I and he is 11 months.

He has had reflux from early days and used to waken screaming...the only thing to help was bf amd keeping him upright.

He has never slept through the night fully...5-6 hours max but since weaning at 6 months he has never slept that long.

For the past 4 weeks he has managed to keep food down (vomiting was a daily occurence for months!).

He probably just needs to know you will be there and not leave him...you are his world. It is hard but although I am tired I'm trying to enjoy all the cuddles while O can.

stargirl1701 · 14/02/2013 23:18

DD is 22 weeks, with silent reflux, and won't sleep without me unless she is moving (pram, car). It's bloody hard.

Rookiepth · 15/02/2013 13:17

Check out puckababy.co.uk I got my sleep back because of it

Original poster
babyperks · 16/02/2013 08:07

Just a quick update. He's now sleeping in his crib again. I stopped giving him his gaviscon on Tuesday as I was convinced he didn't have reflux and it was just his poo that he was having trouble with. So I gave him an oz of water that evening and another oz Wednesday evening. Yesterday he had 2 poos without 1 scream or cry, and he is now back to himself again. All symptoms of reflux have gone. I'm so glad I listened to my instinct!

OP posts:
KatieLily12 · 16/02/2013 18:25

Well done babyperks!

Original poster
babyperks · 17/02/2013 01:09

Thank you, Smile

OP posts:
Charlieburger · 18/02/2013 11:43

Well done babyperks. May it continue.

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