dd massive earring dilemma!!

[jollymollie]

Dd2 is 7 and had her ears pierced 7 weeks ago after much begging and pleading. Last week they were meant to come out. School need her to take them out for pe. Anyway she flatly refuses to let anyone touch them and cannot get them out herself. I have spent countless hours over the last week pleading and bribing but nothing has worked. I simply cannot just leave them in any longer. She has missed weeks of pe so far and school will not accept plasters over them. Short of pinning her down does anyone have any suggestions? We are getting desperate!

My daughter was 5 when I got her ears pierced. I had to wait 8 weeks before she'd let me near them. Even then, it took me two nights of loosening them and taking them out (whilst she was asleep). It was no fun. But like you say op, it's more the fact that it hurts them rather than playing up. I do agree with other posters though, that you will have to stand firm in the end if she is missing so much PE because of it. My daughters school were fine with pierced ears, so thankfully I had less pressure to take them out.

Just to add, I had to hold the head of the stud firmly while I twisted and gently pulled the butterfly clip at the back.

Good luck!

If they hurt then they are not healing well. More reason to get them out and not put them back in.

Ears are quite sensitive. I gave up wearing earrings for pierced ears years ago as they hurt sometimes. I think the best solution out of all these is to take her back to the place that did the piercings and get them to remove the earrings and leave them out till she is 21.

OP, the first earrings have really thick posts and can be much more stiff to take the butterflies off :(
Some thoughts :
Give her another pair of studs to practice with the butterfly on and off - it's hard to visualize what's going on in your ear lobe / round the back
If you help or do it for her, let her hold a mirror to see what you are doing
Have another, new pair of studs ready to put in straight away
Consider buying a new pair as bribery
Try an ice cube in a hankie to numb her lobe (probably just be a distraction but worth a try!)
If at all possible, have someone trusted but not you to have a go - only because we tend to respond better to someone less 'close' in situations like this (eg driving lessons from your parents...)
Have something intensely distracting on tv while you have a go at getting them out
Explain that if they don't come out she's obviously not ready for earrings etc etc.

Good luck.

When I read posts like this, I realise how different parenting styles can be.

This is very very different from mine. There would have been no peirced ears in the first place, but that is not the issue.

Missing p.e. for weeks

I can confidently say that it would never have got this far, but if it for some bizarre reason it had got this far, I would limit every treat going, everything. There would be no tv, no playdates, no sweets, no after school activities, no treats whatsoever in any form or fashion at all.. until those bloody earring are out. Added to which, I would say, if I take them out before the end of the day, then she can get her ears peirced when she is 13. Otherwise it will be much later.

As for ruling the roost? It makes me feel anxious even thinking of that ever happening in my house. Just like my parents, they were most parents rather than friends. My goodness, you did not play around with them. On the other hand, they were the most wonderful, loving, consistent,msupportive parents I could have hoped for. Don't get bogged down in thinking that your daughter will love you more if you don't discipline her firmly. As my mother used to say, I am your mother first and foremost, your friend a distant second.

Are they out?

Sorry to rehash such an old post. What did you do in the end? We’re currently in exactly the same position. Thinking of just removing the earrings and letting them heal over as she can’t put them in and out for PE without a huge process….

Hi Alice I saw your post was recent. My son had to have his one out for PE this morning and he screamed about the fact, so in the end I had to wrap my arms around his arms and his torso whilst his dad took it out, he cried inevitably and when I came home from work at 6pm he said he wanted me to put it back in, but then from him it was.. do it in 2 mins, after I’ve finished eating dinner, after my bath, before bed, tomorrow.. so I’ve told him it is best to let it heal up until he’s older because I don’t want him to feel anxious about it since he has pe twice a week and it is traumatising for him. He said he was sad he had no earring and cried I cuddled him and then he cuddled his dad for 10 mins sobbing. I feel bad for him but he clearly isn’t ready. His sister who is only 18 months older had hers done at the same time he did, she’s 8 in December is fine with me taking them in and out even had a few “ow ow ow” moments from her when putting them back in yesterday but she understands that it can hurt whilst they’re still new (done 6 weeks ago) she’s got pe tomorrow and it’s a breeze to do hers. It’s all dependent on the child.