'SAHMS' that have full time childcare or help - a fantastic liberation or downright lazy?

[Enid]

There are lots of mothers down here in Dorset who are (or whose husbands are) well off enough to afford NOT to work. I know a few and they all have full time aupairs or nannies. One of them has TWO nannies - one for each of her children.

It seems to be a matter of pride that you always take the nanny/au pair on holiday to help with your children. Also that the nanny/au pair takes the children to clubs and activities.

OK - I think it is outrageously lazy (and so does dh). What do you think?

don't agree caligula.

the sahm's i knew with full time nannies don't exactly hang round with the kids and the nannies, they couldn't wait to get away from them, to do their own thing.

Yes but you didn't say the SAHM's you knew SSD, your comment was very generalised. ("I think if you choose to stay at home and still have someone paid to look after the kids all day that bond must be pretty non existant and thats just sad.")

WWW and Soapbox you are most welcome to join us at Harvey Nicks. Actually my inner-thin-glamorous-rich-lady-of-leisure is getting rather carried away and my fingers are itching to dial the number and book a table. It would be rather fun. Not least because this thread has inadvertently bestowed a delicious wickedness upon lunch at the Fifth Floor.

Could we try on clothes for a couple of hours beforehand?

i would like to come to the fifit floor to.

I loved having my nanny or au poar around when i was at home. i had a choice. I could take one or two kids and leave some.

They could al go to the park (my pet hate) and I could sleep. (when babies little)

I could go shoping alone

I could work, catch up on bills etc.

Yes Caligula, with Anchovy's personal shopper. We could also drink too many cocktails and make it home just in time to teeter somewhat drunkenly into the playground to pick up our children.

yes yes,..memememmememe....

we cdan have that service where they bring all the clothes to a huge changing room and we have coffee or champagne

Oh My God... I can't believe this thread! It seems that several of you lot think that looking after your OWN children robs you of some great liberty entitlement! Get over it, it's only for a few years then you can sit on your big fat arses all you like - should you be inclined!

I haven't been on MN for ages because in the last six months we have moved then moved again into our new house. It is a bulding site and the kitchen is currently uninhabitable. We lived in two rooms for the first ten weeks as the rest of the house wasn't ready to live in.

When we moved in I was 36 weeks pregnant with dd2, on crutches due to a pelvic problem and full time looking after dd1 (at the time just 18 months old).

In the last 6 months I have redesigned nearly all of our house, given birth, and look after my two beautiful girls full time.

I am no martyr, I just get on with it. I still manage to look pretty damn fabulous thanks to all the walking i do with a double buggy (wtf needs a personal trainer?) and the lovely haircut i had on Saturday when DH looked after the squidgers.

Why does our society have to feel so bloody entitled to an easy life? I have contended with millions of tears and tantrums (including my own!!) over the last few months but nothing quite beats that feeling of knowing 'I did it all my way'...

Beetroot - I've left your name with the rather haughty but extremely becoming Maitre d'.

Yes Caligula, but we will have to pay a hired help to go in and replace all the labels with ones 3 sizes smaller beforehand, so our inner- only thinness is not discoverd

oh get over yourself PFP...

anyone smell burning???

did they remember me

Prufrock: What you too?! This is a little late to extend our booking Dahling but I'll see what I can do.

This is rather fun. I've never been on Mnet before after a couple of glasses of wine. I'll slope off now to clean out the cat tray, wash up after dinner and unearth my laptop for work tomorrow and leave this thread to ponder the more serious issues of threats to maternal bonding and the vice of indolence.

Chuckling at Beety's reply

Pinkfluffpudding, what are you saying, that because you've been busy and a sahm anyone who wants some help should shut up?

am smiling at the thought of a booking in the name in Beetroot

Prufrock, def about the labels. Could they sort out some slimming mirrors too?

I stick by my first comments.

I do think it's sad to have a nanny when you don't work and are at home all day.

Can't imagine most people disagreeing with me.

Although I'm sure a pampered few will!

Issymum - shall we really book it?

Dry gin martini with a lemon twist, or maybe a glass of pink champagne.

Nice food, with a crisp white, or maybe a warm, luxurious red

And lots and lots of MN gossip

Bunyanvillas, here's one explanation: I was depressed and exhausted when dd was 14 months old. I got help two part-days per week, and my health and self-worth have bounced back - now I'm a happier mother and healthier woman. If I'd been coping, I wouldn't have considered it - as it was, I had to overcome guilt, shame, a bunch of judgements, and do what was best for my particular situation.
And a bonus: I finally had time to discover MN...

Re this thread in general: I'm with whoever said they didn't like the polarization of views - don't think life is so black and white.

yes we all go off and have our nails filed and sit drinking coffee

'Get over it, it's only for a few years then you can sit on your big fat arses all you like - should you be inclined! '

My arse isn't fat. In fact, I'm not fat at all. Never have been.

'I am no martyr but nothing quite beats that feeling of knowing 'I did it all my way'...

No, you're not a martyr. You're a control freak.

And well enough, good for you, I'm glad you can pat yourself on the back.

But different strokes for different folks, don't you think?

Some people don't need to do it all their way and are perfectly happy.