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Original poster

Taking a newborn out in public

49 replies

footyfan · 07/10/2011 01:49

I have a 2-week old, who is only actually due today.

I have been out to various drs appointments etc, but have also been shopping with him and for a couple of meals.

I was in a supermarket today, and got told I was being a bad mother, and that my baby should stay at home until he is 6-months old!

What does everyone else do? Surely I can't stay home for months on end- but am I being irresponsible by going to public places?

I live abroad, so wondered what the current advice in the UK is.

OP posts:

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madhattershouse · 07/10/2011 01:53

There is no real rules on this. As long as you are well enough and the baby is warm/cool enough then go for it. 6 months?? Are they bloomin mad?? I was at a wedding 10 days after my eldest was born and people thought I was odd for leaving the reception early as I was tired!

madhattershouse · 07/10/2011 01:54

There are... was thinking of 2 things at the same time

BertieBotts · 07/10/2011 02:09

Don't worry, we have annoying (but well-meaning) people like that here too! Seems as soon as you start showing a pregnancy bump you're public property for all sorts of unsolicited (and often ridiculous) advice.

Unless it's a particular culture in the country you are in (I think I read somewhere that in some parts of Mexico they don't take babies out below a certain age in case they get the "evil eye"?) I wouldn't worry about it too much. Even if it is a cultural thing you do have to take babies out sometimes - for the doctor's appointment as you mentioned. You could just say "Everyone takes babies out this young in my home country, and they are all fine."

Anyway short version is he will be fine, of course he will be fine. As long as he's dressed appropriately for the weather you can take him wherever you like.

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madhattershouse · 07/10/2011 02:16

Thinking about it my son was due on the day of the wedding, he was 10 days early. My twins got their first outing at 2 weeks (they were in special care for 9 days) as I wanted to go and vote!! As Bertie said tell them it is normal where you come from, ignore the so-called rules people want to impose, they are meaningless.

madwomanintheattic · 07/10/2011 05:41

are you in Germany by any chance? culturally it is the def the norm there for newborns to not be seen in public at all (and they use those huuuuuuuuuge air filled duvets from birth that completely obscure the crib even in the hospital. and you aren't allowed to carry them in the hospital, they have to be pushed in the crib like a giant mobile marshmallow cloud.

we took dd1 to a furniture shop when she was about 2 weeks old and i thought the general public might have a collective coronary.

i wouldn't worry. they'll just think you are the crazy english lady. ds will be fine.

i love having babies around the world - my three have all been born in different countries, and the cultural differences are astounding!!! i have a friend who keeps asking me to write a book

twinklespeciallyforlittlegirls · 07/10/2011 05:52

It makes my day when I see newborns out and about :)

OP, I find the best way to deal with interfering auld wagons unsolicited advice from strangers is to put my head on one side, nod and say "hmm" vaguely whilst walking away, then to rant about them afterwards.
If you are not native to the country you're living in I'd use that to your advantage too, employ thick accent/non-native sentence construction and say the equivalent of "sorry, not understand" whilst smiling.
I have been known to pretend to be French/Portuguese/ to get rid of charity muggers etc.!

twinklespeciallyforlittlegirls · 07/10/2011 05:52

ps madwoman any chance of a thread about different baby customs around the world? I'd like to read that.

nooka · 07/10/2011 06:07

What a weird idea. Still my mother was of the mind that babies should be out of doors for several hours a day pretty much from birth, and I guess that was a generational/cultural thing too.

CogitoErgoSometimes · 07/10/2011 06:57

I'm amazed that anyone was so unbelieveably rude as to tell you to stay confined to your house for 6 months!!! You take them out Day 1 otherwise how are a lot of people supposed to get them home from hospital?

mousesma · 07/10/2011 07:07

I took DD to my PILs anniversary party when she was 2 weeks old which included an overnight stay no-one batted an eyelid.

RitaMorgan · 07/10/2011 07:12

Are you in Germany? Steiner types are also very into the whole don't-take-the-baby-out-for-6-months thing.

GirlWithTheMouseyHair · 07/10/2011 08:11

we took DS to the british museum when he was nine days old, because in my state of post birth shock I thought we ought to make the most of DH's paternity leave, and DS was still post birth sleepy. I wouldn't recommend doing that again, but I had to get out the house every day just for some air....ignore them all, you and baby need to not go stir crazy

JiltedJohnsJulie · 07/10/2011 08:15

Six months is a very long time to sit in a house with only a baby for company. I started taking DS out at about 2 weeks, but would have taken him out earlier but DH was a bit worried and I was getting used to bfing and trying to sleep.

DD went out from day 1.

Listen to people who give you this advice, smile, nod and then carry on as you were.

You are not a bad mother, sounds like you are a fab one to me .

LDNmummy · 07/10/2011 08:24

I'm taking DD (first time I write that ) who is one week old out today for the first time.

I have been indoors the whole week with her and that is enough IMO. We both need fresh air and some outside the house stimulus, there is nothing wrong with that.

TheThunderboltKid · 07/10/2011 08:27

DS was born 11 days early and the day before his due date I had the haircut I never managed to have before he was born (was in and out of hospital for a few weeks before he was born). And he'd been out before that (although I was walking slowly due to not great birth).

DD went out at a few days old

BlueKangaroo22 · 07/10/2011 08:30

ha! thats ridiculous, my dd went on her first trip to asda at 6 days old!

Firawla · 07/10/2011 08:32

6 months?!?! that is crazy. i have heard people say about dont go out too much for 40 days or 6 weekish, bcause of the mum needs to get rest aswel as the baby being little but if you feel healthy why not go out as soon as you want, its noone's business. i dont think it is irresponsible. unless your baby had a very bad immune system (then they would be in hosp anyway?) then going out into public places is not going to harm them

Robotindisguise · 07/10/2011 08:37

Health visitors in our area practically crowbar you out of the door as soon as you can - because getting out and about makes you less likely to become depressed.

Maryz · 07/10/2011 08:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Pagwatch · 07/10/2011 08:49

I have always taken my dc out first day home - so 2 days old.

I bloody hate hospitals so like to get out and about asap.

lenak · 07/10/2011 08:51

DD is two weeks old today. We got home with her at 11pm on the Friday - stayed in on Saturday and Sunday but loads of visitors, the the rest of the week went like this:

Monday - walked down to local primary school with baby in sling to look round nursery and reception for DD1 to start.

Tuesday - went to a retail park to go to boots and B&M.

Wednesday - went to buy new laptop and go to the supermarket. Went to pick DD1 up from MIL's house.

Thursday - Costco and Ikea.

Friday - Nature Reserve with DD1

Saturday - took DD1 to gymnastics and then went to pet shop and Burger King.

To be fair though, we haven't been out of the house since then! In hindsight, it was probably a bit much, but DH is self-employed and could only have the one week off.

Original poster

footyfan · 07/10/2011 08:59

Thanks everyone- I'm in South America, but the attitudes sound the same as Germany. It's over 30 degrees here, and everyone also keeps telling me he's not wearing enough - they'd have him in 5 layers and a blanket!!

I'd assumed I wasn't doing any harm - but thanks for the reassurance!

I'll just smile politely and ignore them from now on.

OP posts:

matana · 07/10/2011 09:10

Too funny. I was out with my DS at 2 days old. 6 months indoors would bore your DS rigid and send you loopy. Utterly ridiculous.

MrsChemist · 07/10/2011 09:16

I went to a food festival when DS2 was two days old. I really didn't want to miss it.

I think it's actually better to get out as soon as possible. It stops it being such a big deal, getting out of the house. In fact, one of the MWs insisted on leaving the house ASAP

FeelMyWraith · 07/10/2011 09:21

DH took ds out to the bakery to pick up a loaf of bread. DS was about 10 days old and snuggled up happily in the sling. The bakery is 200 yards from our house. An old man really upset dh by calling him irresponsible, telling him he should be ashamed of himself, that babies belong indoors with their mothers. Wish I'd been there. DH came back really deflated.

I have a 4yo who has to go to school every day. DS was born the Saturday before she started reception. If I didn't go out, she wouldn't get to school.

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