Talk to me about the NCT

[Melissad]

Hi, I'm 38 and expecting our third child in 9 weeks time... eeek! Our eldest daughters are 11 and 8, so quite a big gap. I don't want to do antenatal classes this time (been there, done that) but would like to meet some local Mums with babies. I don't know any; my friends all have older children now. I figured the NCT might be a good place to start because there might be more old fogey mummies there like me, and it might be more bearable than some of the godawful baby groups I attended with my oldest daughters.But I've heard rumours (of the negative variety) concerning NCT groups and want to be prepared.. will it be ok?!!!

Also, there's an NCT nearly new sale near us tomorrow afternoon. Is it worth going? I've heard they are really good and I've still loads to buy for this baby (got rid of the stuff we bought for our oldest girls), but have also heard it can be a pretty grim rugby scrum situation with lots and lots of queueing and lots of impatient people? Worth going, or not?
Thanks

Definitely go to the NNS, what have you got to lose? (apart from a quid or two entrance fee). Maybe go along later, the very best stuff will have gone but it will be much quieter and you'll probably still be able to pick up baby clothes.

I'd join up and get invited to some postnatal teas, again the worst that can happen is you've wasted a bit of money and had a boring afternoon, but on the upside you've supported a well-meaning charity that does do some good campaigning work, and made some useful contacts, maybe even friends.

I wouldn't do the antenatal classes though, they're so expensive.

hi melissad
i've just had DC1, and was really grateful for my NCT classes and group. i now meet the group weekly with our babies, and it really keeps me sane. i would say that the classes really focus on the birth process. it was helpful for me, but DH wasn't overly impressed, and i'm sure you know what you're doing now!

so i agree with dilys - maybe join up to get the benefit of their coffee mornings etc, but don't bother with the classes. also, the baby groups in my area are actually really good - lots of mums my age (32) and up. might be worth just giving them another go? they're only really as good as the current crop of new mums so you never know!

oh, and the NNSs are good - can be a bit rugby scrum esque (the police were at the only one i went to - forming a barricade between the members and the non-members - hilarious!) i liked it for the books - great condition and dirt cheap, and a few random nursery bits and bobs.

good luck!

Agree with suedehead- am going back for dc2 more for company of other mums in early day than anything else. Never been brave enough to go to a nns

See if there is a local bumps and babes in your area. NCT groups often organise them. Quickest way is probably to see of your local "branch" has a Facebook page. And yes get along to the sale; totally worth it!

Oh and I am old fogey like you (same age) - was pleasantly surprised that age range was more old fogey (35 plus) than I thought in my last nct group

The sales are brilliant - I would definitely go. If you are going to join the NCT, join beforehand as members go in first.

I met most of my friends through pregnancy yoga and local breastfeeding group (we were all late-30s/early 40s).

Our sale is tomorrow, it is a bit manic but some very good bargains to be had. I went to ante-natal classes when I was 36 and expecting Dc1 and made a very close group of friends of similar age, we still meet up most weeks nearly 8 years on. Also made lots of other friends via NCT weekly groups and I was on the committee for a while. Have a look on FB for your branch, also have a look at their section on the NCT website to find out what's going on locally.

I would have thought it would be well worth going to any baby group they have going -although bear in mine there will be lots of people going through the first time parent thing in the early days - you don't need to join to go to any group
I loved my local NCT - great group of people
some area do refresher antenatal classes which might be a good way to meet 2nd - or more mums
agree pregancy exercise classes can be a really good way to meet people as well -I did aqua natal

I did NCT classes when pregnant with DD and really glad I did - the classes themselves were so-so (I think they vary alot depending on the teacher) but 21 months on still in touch with the rest of my group (and during maternity leave we were meeting up more than once a week). All realy lovely people, not at all the stereotype some people had told me of NCT - i.e. thought they might be really posh, very strick on BF, natural birth etc - not at all! Age range was 28-38 in our group. Having said that, you've said you don't want antenatal classes, and you certainly wouldn't need most of the info we got if you've been trhough ti before. I'm not sure how useful I would have found NCT for making friends if I hadn't been to the classes though as I didn;t really go to any of the mother and baby groups afterwards - I find that kind of thing quite intimidating to walk in to and didn't need to as our antenatal group did our own thing! I think they do have quite a good network for coffee mornigns etc though. I think they also do short 'refresher' antenatal classes - perhaps best of both worlds?

I did go to a few Nearly new sales and would recommend (preferably before you ahve the baby or if you can get a sitter afterwards - I wouldn;t brave them with a child!) - lots of bargains. Hint - take a cheque book as one time there was a seperate queue for paying with checks and was a lot shorter.

You might also want to think about volunteering at a nearly-new NCT sale in the future - volunteers get a pre-sale where they can cherrypick the really good stuff!

Hi melissad, I would join, the classes are expensive, but like you we went to them maunly to meet other parents with a similar outlook. My DS is now 9 months and I see several of the other mums regularly, they have been a great support group especially in the early days.

I enjoyed the classes (DS is our first) and they made me think about many aspects of the birth that I wouldn't have done otherwise, although if this is your 3rd, you may not need this aspect.

The only think I would say on the negative side is that NCT definately have an agenda; thay would prefer you to have a home birth, with no drugs, to breast feed and co-sleep. We went bearing all this in mind, and took on board the stuff that worked for us and ignored the rest.
If I ever get brave enough to have another, I would probably still do the classes again.

Congratulations, and I hope all goes well with your new addition!
xx

YY to volunteering at the sale, it is good fun and you really do get the pick of the stuff.