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Parenting

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Original poster

Having two dd's

18 replies

pommedechocolat · 25/09/2011 12:50

We have just found out that dc2 (currently baking) is going to be dd2. It looks likely that we will only have two children so we will never have a son.

I am excited about having two girls as am quite girly myself and I can see a certain ease related to having two of the same. I am however a little disappointed as everyone says that ds's adore their mothers and dd's their fathers (certainly the case for me with my father and dd1 with dh).

Does this mean that I will be second best parent for both my children? Anyone got any dd's that favour them?

I am also worried about making sure they both feel individuals rather than just a part of the 'Pommette Sisters' club. Any tips here too?

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TheFeministsWife · 25/09/2011 12:57

Well we have 3 dds (1 is DSD) and while DSD is (obviously) a daddy's girl, as is dd1 to an extent (although it was more when she younger than now), but dd2 although she loves her daddy is very much a mummy's girl. She will always pick me over DH. When I was growing up my sister was a daddy's girl (still is) and I was very much a mummy's girl (still am). So it doesn't always work the same way.

Loopymumsy · 25/09/2011 13:28

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Original poster

pommedechocolat · 25/09/2011 14:42

Loopy that is definitely expert numbers (of any gender!).

Some good logical advice thanks both.

Did either of you get comments from others about being sad about not having a boy? My family haven't done that (although my dad has made some jokes about dh and a shed etc) but dh is telling his tonight and I think they might. I feel upset for dd2 that people will think/say that.

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Loopymumsy · 25/09/2011 18:44

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lollystix · 25/09/2011 20:41

I'm the opposite - I'm baking ds4 - you made me laugh about the nappy changing of a boy cos I've only don't a girl once and was clueless. I have same with my ds's. Ds1 a daddy's boy, ds2 a mummy's boy and ds3 really independent. I get pads of comments about not having a daughter and how a son is a son till he finds a wife etc. You cant win. Obviously can't comment on mixed genders but 2 (or 4) of same gender is lovely - mine are such good mates in a way I'm not sure mixed gender kids would be.

fannybanjo · 25/09/2011 20:47

I have 3 DD's and DD1 and DD2 are total
Mummy's girls and it's hard sometimes to split myself between them both however DD3 more like my DH in personality and cries for the cat not DH or I!! DD2 especially a Mini Me, copies everything I do etc - honestly forget what sex they are, they will just be themselves.

fannybanjo · 25/09/2011 20:51

I also think mothers of sons unfortunately get "oh you trying for a girl?" rather than mothers of girls. I had it a couple of times when pregnant with DD3 but my friend who has 3 DS's had it far more. It used to drive her mad.

lollystix · 25/09/2011 20:53

Yes fannybanjo - the pity I get drives me nuts. DH would get it if they were girls.

cheeseandmarmitesandwich · 25/09/2011 22:20

2 little girls are fab! Most importantly, as others have said, they will never be just the 'pommette sisters', they will be individuals, gender makes no difference to that! Don't just assume DD2 will be just like DD1 at that age. My DDs are so different and it is wonderful seeing their personalities develop as well as their relationship with each other.

Plus you save loads on clothes, and I loved getting out all DD1's baby clothes for DD2, so lovely to see them again!

My DH adores having girls especially teaching them typical 'boy' things. DD1 looks like butter wouldn't melt but she is the most rough and tumble kid I know and can climb a tree like a cat...DH has plans for her to be the next rock climbing or mountain biking champion

cheeseandmarmitesandwich · 25/09/2011 22:20

Plus you save loads on clothes, and I loved getting out all DD1's baby clothes for DD2, so lovely to see them again!

Pigleychez · 25/09/2011 22:46

I have two girls 21 mths apart.
Its fab :)

They are best friends and adore each other. They love dressing up together and look so cute wearing matching feather boas!
Fab to pass down clothes too. All those beautiful dresses that DD1 only wore once can be worn again!

DD1 looks like a mini me but is a Daddy's girl where DD2 looks more like DH but is a Mummies girl!
Agree with what others have said.. They may be sisters but they are completely different. DD1 is a complete overdramatic wimp where as DD2 is a little tough-nut daredevil!

Loopsy we too got lots of comments about how DH must want a boy and we can always try again.
My reply was that we wanted another 'child' regardless of its sex.
We never found out the sex (of either girls) but DH had already said he wanted another girl so was very happy with his 2nd daughter -Not sure he will be so happy when there's 3 lots of PMT in the house though! . :)

LeBOF · 25/09/2011 22:53

I've got two girls, and tbh they are much closer to me. That might be circumstances though, but I love the mother-daughter bond- it's very special.

budgieshell · 25/09/2011 22:57

We have 2 dd's 15 months apart they are the best of friends and I think it is the best combination.

Before I had children I always said I wanted boys but as soon as I got pregnant I secretly wanted girls both times.

You are so lucky, I just hope I can say the same after the teenage years.

FessaEst · 25/09/2011 23:11

I have recently had DD2, and did get a few comments about "trying for a boy next time" and one colleague asked if I was disappointed

They are already very different, in both looks and personality. You are having another person first and foremost, they are individuals, and being girls comes second. I love getting the same clothes out again, and I am really looking forward to them playing together etc.

Congratulations!

Turkelton · 25/09/2011 23:59

I have 2yr old twin dds and they are both mammys girls, one more so to the extent where she will tell poor DH to "shoooo" and one just for nappy changes, medicine, getting dressed, its "no, mammy do" :)
With regards to them being alike, mine are complete opposites! chalk and cheese, and seem to be getting more different as they get older. We will be trying again (though not because we want a boy ) just because we want 3

Original poster

pommedechocolat · 26/09/2011 08:47

Thanks all for such encouraging comments. It does seem sometimes that one of each is the 'accepted' combo and people assume you must be unhappy with any other result. Quite unfair.

I've already been getting out all the clothes again! I love clothes which is probably more likely to be more fun with two girls. I can't wait to meet our new little one. Hacving peeped at your profile Turkelton we are thinking of one of your dd's names for her as well!

I was one of each and my brother and I got on really well until about teenage years. Tehn we fought like cat and dog. Now we get on fine but don't keep in touch/see each other like people I know do with sisters or dh does with his bro. So hopefully with same gender it's more of a friend for life thing.

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ninani · 26/09/2011 14:45

I only have boys and they all love their dad a lot. He is their favourite! I have heard that because mothers are strict and fathers are more relaxed children tend to like their dads a lot.

Arrogantcat · 27/09/2011 11:41

I have two girls (19 months apart) and they adore me and each other. They are definately mummies girls.

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