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Parenting

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Original poster

Can a mature 10yo look after themselves until we get back from work?

19 replies

VivaLeBeaver · 07/09/2011 22:33

DD is in Yr6 and yet again I have childcare problems. Childminder is stopping at the end of Nov. DD will be nearly 11 by then.

She'd get home at 4 and DH wouldn't be home until 6. Its 2 nights a week max. If I work an early then I need to leave the house at 7 and DD would need to get herself ready for school and go. But I hardly ever work earlies and if I do I can try and work them on a Tues or Fri when DH works from home. I can try and work my shifts on weekends and Tues and Fris as much as possible but can't manage it every week.

We're a 5 min walk from school with no roads to cross so no problem there. In a crisis she could go to my next door neighbours who have teenage kids so are normally in late afternoons, early evenings. Or she could ring my mum who is 15 minute drive away.

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Bohica · 07/09/2011 22:38

Only you know your daughter, I personally wouldn't have a problemm with this and I'm going through a similar dilema myself.

DD is y5 and I need her to wait outside (before gates open) school for 10 minutes every morning and hang about after school for 10 minutes every day so I can get DD2 & DD3 to their schools and get to work on time.

It's 2 nights a week max and you have teenage friends next door you can alert incase she needs help, could you ask them to pop in and check she is ok or maybe ask your mum to pop over and visit her?

Original poster

VivaLeBeaver · 07/09/2011 22:40

Do you know asking the teenage girl next door if she wants to do some baby sitting might be an idea. She could earn some pocket money and DD has someone a bit older than her to keep an eye on her.

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Original poster

VivaLeBeaver · 07/09/2011 22:40

I can't ask my mum. She drives me insane. I think I'd rather leave work.

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mymumdom · 07/09/2011 22:43

How does she feel about this? Is she sensible? If my child was happy enough then I think I'd be okay with this.

Bohica · 07/09/2011 22:48

You might be on to something with the teenage neighbours! I often give my 16y old neighboour pocket money for helping out during the weekend so I can get my ironing done!

I'm nervous about giving DD1 such responsibility but she is keen and I know she is capable and I'm having to do it 5 days a week.

I'm with you on the mother front as well

Original poster

VivaLeBeaver · 07/09/2011 22:49

I haven't spoken to her yet. I've only just come in from work to find out that CM is stopping.

What would I do about her tea? She is starving by 5:00pm but I wouldn't want her cooking on her own. She could go to teh chippy over the road once a week maybe but not twice. She won't eat sandwichs.

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theredhen · 07/09/2011 22:54

I'd probably let her have a piece of cake or something until you get home. Don't over complicate things by adding in a trip somewhere where she could lock herself out or something.

Original poster

VivaLeBeaver · 07/09/2011 22:58

You're right. Cake and cheese.

I'm trying to think what she could microwave. Mmmm maybe microwave chips or pizza. I know its not healthy but its safe.

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Bohica · 07/09/2011 22:58

It's only till 6 so could she have cold chicken salad, toasted bagel or cereal?

Does she have a mobile? I'm going to get DD1 a bulk standard mobile so I can text her once I'm on my way to get her.

Bohica · 07/09/2011 22:59

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Original poster

VivaLeBeaver · 07/09/2011 23:04

She has a mobile but I can't be contacted though my DH and mum can. I have friends in the village she could ring as well.

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cory · 08/09/2011 07:46

I would do this if she was happy. Cake and cheese sound good.

ripstheirthroatoutliveupstairs · 08/09/2011 09:28

Sounds fine to me too. My DD will probably be left alone for an hour or so afte school, assuming I ever find a job that is.
DD will have to get a bus home from school too.

MockingbirdsNotForSale · 08/09/2011 09:57

I used to be left on my own from age 9 for that amount of time and I used to make soup (tinned tomato) and toast or just cheese on toast that kind of thing or more often I'd raid the freezer and have a massive bowl of ice-cream! My mum also used to stock the freezer with salmon fishcakes and I'd often put them in the oven and have them-generally on their own!

Original poster

VivaLeBeaver · 08/09/2011 10:07

Well I taked to DD about it this morning and she says she's not sure about it. But I suspect more as she is gutted about not being able to go to the childminder as she loves the childminder and the other kids. CM thought about packing up a while ago and DD was so upset that CM relented. I think DD is hoping to apply emotional blackmail again but I've warned her that she can't.

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ThePosieParker · 08/09/2011 10:11

There's research to suggest that children that come home to an empty house do not do as well at school or emotionally. Can you imagine to coming home to an empty house at that age? I think it's pretty rubbish for her self esteem tbh. I think you should use after school club, friends, relatives or anything else.

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VivaLeBeaver · 08/09/2011 11:30

Great news, it looks like we've found another childminder! Have to arrange to go and see her but it sounds promising.

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Original poster

VivaLeBeaver · 08/09/2011 11:30

Thanks for all the advice by the way, I do appreciate it.

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ThePosieParker · 08/09/2011 11:31

Good. x

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