4WO really tricky to settle. Any ideas

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Hoping for the miracle cure... Or at least someone to tell me its completely normal. DS3 who is 4wo is v v tricky to settle. Wants to be held, rocked, cuddled all the time and every time you put him in the cot he wakes up 5 mins later screaming. So you start all over again. Also, my other two were v refluxy (cows milk intolerance) so worrying he might be too. V farty, v tricky to burp, and wakes up every time you lie him flat. I've conveniently forgotten what the early days were like with the other two, so some advice or helpful tips would be good - or just tell me that he'll come out the other side in time, no matter how much I cuddle and rock him now!!

My DS is 4 weeks old too; he's also very farty although doesn't have an objection to being laid flat, that does unfortunately sound like it might be a reflux issue.

What does seem to magically settle him is white noise - my DD was the same and used to stop crying and fall asleep while I was drying my hair, although we've gone all hi-tech this time and I have an app on my phone - the extreme rain sound seems to be his favourite.

It is true that he will get through it and all the cuddles in the world won't give you any 'negative' consequences in the future, but hopefully you will also get some good coping strategies in the meantime.

The HV suggested to me putting a pillow underneath the mattress in the carrycot so that the sleeping position was slightly sloped rather than flat (head highest and feet lowest obviously not left to right - that would be weird).

I must admit though, back when my DD was 4 wks old I gave her all the cuddles in the world and made OH sleep on the sofa so she could sleep in with me. It was the only way either of us got any sleep. It doesn't seem to have done us any harm. She is now 5 months old and asleep in her cot while I play on the computer :) I also think my LO suffered with colic and we had some really bad nights.

I too was going to suggest white noise or similar (I have one of those teddies with the sound box inside, it has as heart beat etc and a classical lullaby, it worked absolute wonders for us) and I was also going to suggest to raise the head end of the cot.

good luck

P.S just googled what we have and its a prince lionheart slumber bear.

White noise all the way here! Dd seven weeks and as I type my phone is hissing away! Mind you, these days, thanks to my app I could have twenty different kinds of White noise from the city street to the Tibetan singing bowl! With dd 1 it was a simple radio set between stations! Sorry for digression, hope it gets better for you

If DC3 was really cranky I used to soothe her using what I think is called the 5 S technique: swaddle, side( turn her onto her side onto my seated knees), sway(sort of jiggled her gently) shhh, (making a loud shhh noise), suck (if needed offer a dummy or clean finger). I saw this on Richard and Judy and was sceptical but it really worked. It's all stuff you kind of do anyway but more effective in combination. I think there are clips showing this technique on you tube etc. Once she was calm I put her down with a white noise CD.

Your DS3 sounds exactly like my DS2!
He's now 15 weeks and frankly it was a nightmare. Wouldn't be put down, very farty etc.
I changed his milk that helped the fartyness.
My husband friend had a baby by section and he was like this too except the fartyness. They took him to a baby phy who told them that he had a birth trauma from being delivered by CS so he needed a white noise machine.
I sometimes put my DS2 in the utility in a bouncer necxt to the tumble dryer for noise.
He still is disturbed by the smallist of things, like his older btrother shouting or whatever. But I can put him down now which is a relief. Sometimes!
Jesus it's hard isn't it?! Doesn't help MIL says "he wants to be nursed all the time
like she's around all the time to see him!?!
Let me know how he goes.

entirely normal.

with dd1 she just wanted to be left alone, so at 6 weeks we put her in her own room.

with ds1, he wanted movement, so we danced with him for hours every night.

with dd2, swaddling and using raised head end sort of worked. (cheating a bit here as at 4 wo she was still in the hospital and not my problem!)

but really, by 10 months they all slept. honest. until 2. when the night terrors kicked in.