naughty mat - am i too harsh?

[bourneville]

I started using a naughty mat a couple of months ago. It worked wonders, I am calmer cos I have something to fall back on, dd knows where she stands, and she usually obeys me once I have threatened the naughty mat.

Thing is, recently she has been testing my limits more than usual so there are now quite a few threats of the naughty mat per day, and today she even was saying "naughty mat naughty mat" like she wanted to go on it (after I'd threatened it) so on the naughty mat she went and of course yelled the place down the whole 2 minutes she was on there!

So far I have only had to use it for when she is refusing to come and get dressed, or come and put her coat on, including if she turns on her jelly legs ! - oh also for if she refuses to help tidy up. I feel a bit mean & controlling, cos it's only cos she's not doing as I tell her to, and it occurs to me that in Supernanny it's usually used for really bad behaviour like hitting isn't it? Or have I remembered wrong? Is it ok to use it just for not doing as she's told? I'm just afraid that she'll test & test limits until the naughty mat is no longer much of a threat to her, and if she starts behaving REALLY badly the naughty mat isn't enough of a punishment, iykwim.

She is 2.3. I must admit i have been very slack at teaching her to dress herself. She is keen to, but most of the time I am too lazy or in too much of a hurry to have the patience to watch her struggle with her clothes! Wow we really are getting to the bottom of things aren't we I should prob, then, have a sticker chart/pasta jar, alongside really going for encouraging her to dress herself so that she actually looks forward to doing it...
thanks all!

btw colditz dd is def bothered by the naughty mat, the threat of it normally works. But i haven't been using it for very long, that's why I was wondering if I should be doing something else, in case she does get used to it or she starts displaying even worse behaviour. She is bound to test me a lot more in the future!

PLus in general she is such a good girl that it's a pity that I am so often having to use a negative form of discipline.

oops i've said a lot of that earlier!

i will point out here that ds, 2.6, has not a clue how to dress himself, so i that is something you are keen on my tactics may not be the best.

lol . I'm not expecting that she should be able to dress herself by now, it's just that when I do give her the opportunity to try she's very keen. I'll give it a go.