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Parenting

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Original poster

Birthday Party Etiqutte?

17 replies

EmmaPW · 05/07/2011 17:05

Do we let the birthday boy open his presents in front of people? I thought yes what fun - but people keep telling me its bad etiquette?

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ExitPursuedByAKitten · 05/07/2011 17:06

Ooh no. We usually do it when everyone has gone home - maybe just one friend left who is staying over. It is then easier to make a list of who gave what so you don't do any inappropriate recycling of gifts.

threefeethighandrising · 05/07/2011 17:10

I would say yes do open your presents in front of people. Part of the pleasure of giving is seeing the recipient open it, surely?

And it will give your DS a chance to learn the custom of pretending you like presents you hate saying thank you

I would think it was weird if someone took a present from me at a birthday party and didn't open it.

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EmmaPW · 05/07/2011 17:29

I have this image of him opening things and saying "what have you bought me that for?" or "that's rubbish!"

Still - it would stop people buying crap presents !!!

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kitbit · 05/07/2011 17:37

How old is he and how many kids? Makes a slight difference imo :)

yousankmybattleship · 05/07/2011 17:40

We've always opened them later. Partly because it easier to keep them organised and make a thank you list and partly because I'm terrified of the honesty of children who are more than capable of saying they've already got/hate/don't need something. We usually open presents the next day.

GrimmaTheNome · 05/07/2011 17:44

Every party DD has ever been to, the presents are never opened on the spot. They are kept till afterwards to be opened in an orderly fashion with parent making a list of who sent what so that you or child (depending on age) can write thank-you notes.

Avoids tricky moments when 3 people have given child the same thing, or an innocent mother-of-boys has bought pink clothes that a DD couldn't help going [hm] at

Original poster

EmmaPW · 05/07/2011 17:56

It's his third birthday party. There will be about five kids there.

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woopsidaisy · 05/07/2011 18:17

If it is family, GPs etc I let them open their gifts in front of them.
However if it is a 'kiddies" party,then definitely don't open until later.
He may want to play with something he has unwrapped-or the visitors might!
And at that age that can result in meltdown.
I do as Grimma said above.

Bouviergirl · 06/07/2011 13:38

We open. Also 3yo. Part of the party fun is opening the presents. Other children want to help rip paper off. Guests who have given presents want to be involved and see dc's pleasure and excitement. We thank them there and then, and also send a follow-up note. Never been a problem at ours or others who also do this.

EssexGurl · 06/07/2011 14:54

Only for family do's. For big parties then the presents get piled up in the corner and opened at home. As a pp has said, that way you can get a proper list of who has given what and also avoid any scenes if they don't like it. My 2 love opening presents and it takes hours as they both like to play with toys / try on clothes etc. Very sweet but you do need a stiff gin to get through it sometimes!!

Eglu · 06/07/2011 14:58

Since it is a small party, then yes it is fine. Bigger parties it's a no though as the child will want to play with toys and can't, or other children will want to play with them etc, and it will become a nightmare.

elphabadefiesgravity · 06/07/2011 15:18

We don't open. tried it once when I was new at this kids parties lark and I didn't know who bought what.

Unless you are absolutely sure that no-one will have bought duplicate presents and your child will not say I don't like that I like Ben10 instead of Star Wars and he then won't want to start opening packages and playing with the stuff then wait until later.

Ryma · 06/07/2011 16:49

No way, better at home

Roo83 · 07/07/2011 11:40

At 3 I'd save them-ds was so overwhelmed with presents on his bday we ended up spreading them over a few days. With presents from us, aunties and uncles, gp's etc. it was just too many for him to get through as he likes to get each thing out of the box. Just make a list of he gave what so you can thank them. I also have taken photos of ds with the toy and text them to my friends so they can see him enjoying it.

UniS · 08/07/2011 20:14

justa few friends over to play type party- yes,

invite the whole class to bounce round village hall type party- no.

neolara · 08/07/2011 20:38

No, no, no! It'll be a disaster. Honest. Every time we've seen it happen it's been horrible. Even when it works OK for the majority of presents you are likely to have at least one "I don't like that" / "I've got that already" which is quite frankly, embarrassing for all concerned.

eandemum · 08/07/2011 22:29

No Way - could be disastrous! The other children will all want tp play with the new stuff - bits will go missing, giver (if too young) may not know what the present is and then complain that they want it! (Have seen this happen!)

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