could you leave them for 3 days?

[bagpussmice]

dh and I are off to New York in January and leaving the little ones with Grandma and Grandad for 3 days. Friends have said - how could you leave them for so long, and what if something happens to you both? I wasn't nervous but am now following these comments.
Have you ever been away? I am feeling indulgent and guilty for leaving them!

how old are they?

How little are they?

Yes, I could. Left DS for two nights when he was 17mo. Had a wonderful time. Enjoy it!

I work long days and nights, so while I haven't actually gone anywhere, I have gone 4 days before without seeing DS. I don't enjoy it, but, if I were away having a lovely little break and I was happy they were being well looked after, I'm sure I would IYSWIM.

Well mine are 2 and 5 - and if we had an opportunity like that then I'd go - they'll get spoilt rotten with Grandma and Grandad and will love every minute.

dd is 3 and we are happy to toddle off for a weekend without her
Grandma's adore her and she gets doted on
I can only manage 3 days though, then I really miss her.

bagpuss, interesting.
A colleague and partner have just gone away for 3-4 days without their 3 yo. Seem quite happy about it. I wouldn?t be bothered about the children, but I know I would miss them so much I wouldn?t like it. But if they will be happy and you will be hapopy, it?s no-one else?s business really.

Sorry that wasn?t very clear. What I mean is I am sure the children would be fine, it?s me I would be worried about, ie I would miss them too much.
DH and I went away for one night when I was pg with ds2, and we spent the whoel evening talking about ds1 and dd! Was nice to get up when we wanted the next monring tho (mind you, we both woke with a start at 6.30am!)

We did 2 days in September when ds was 2.5 and it was fine! Just this morning, ds was talking about what a lovely time he'd had with his grandparents. I'd do 3 now!

Personally I couldn't have done it with him much younger, but like clary, that's because I'd have found it hard to stop thinking about him.

HAve a great time!

It's funny, I've been more-or-less called a freak for never having had a weekend away from DS1 (he's 4 now).

Do whatever you're comfortable with ...

they are 4 and 2. I have been away on my own for 2 nights and left them with DH, but it's kind of different both of us going away for more than one night together. I know I will miss them, 3 days is quite a long time, but we will hopefully be having a great time and it will go quickly!

I spend my life feeling guilty (Catholic upbringing ) but still manage to leave my kids on a reasonably regular basis. I've just come back from a girlie weekend in Barcelona - the kids (12, 7 & 2) had a ball with DH who said he really enjoyed being with them on his own, and DH and I try to get away for a weekend by ourselves once a year. I adore my children and spend a lot of time with them, but I reckon they do much better with a mum who has a life that doesn't always revolve around them. As long as you are 100% happy with the arrangements you have made for them, go and enjoy. I think it is really important to make time for each other in a relationiship - when DH and I go away together we get to remember why we had kids in the first place.

No idea. Am too envious of someone who has people to leave her kids with to think clearly, tbh.

Easily. Could leave them for 3 months at the moment .

Seriously though, I have had a girlie weekend for 3 nights without my DDs and absolutely loved it. The girls had lots of fun with DH who is very very laid back, they went to bed when they wanted, ate what they wanted etc etc.

I couldn't.

bagpussmice

Yes I could.

It sounds to me like your 'friends' are killjoys, probably a bit jealous.

I stayed away for 4 nights a few months ago (was cause i was poorly though, that didnt stop me from enjoying it mind!) I really missed the ds's though and would perhaps not stay away so long again xxx

I probably would have left my kids more (or some!) if I had someone I was comfortable leaving them with. My in-laws talk about taking them, but I'm not comfortable leaving pre-verbal kids with them, and anyway, they've only recently become compliant enough that I can trust them to do what I want ...

I do leave mine with DP and waltz off singing a merry tune, on regrettably infrequent occasions. DD2 thinks this is most remiss of me, though.

Before I had children I did not think I would want to leave them but now I realise that sometimes I need to have some time on my own and I know they are happy at Gran and Grandad's. I have a close friend who would never leave her kids and I think some of her attitude had rubbed off on me and I felt people would judge me as a bad mother if I did go without them. However I was speaking to my mum about it and said I thought she would think it was wrong too becasue she never went anywhere without us. She said she would have if she could - she just never had the opportunity because of circumstances. Since my mum told me this I've been less judgemental of myself and if I need time away with dh then I will take it. That's not to say I don't miss them and end up talking about them all the time .

I couldn't myself but wouldn't think someone else was heartless etc if they could. And I certainly wouldn't tell them that if they had already booked a trip!!!!!!

Your friends sound a bit to me.

Go and enjoy and take warm clothes brrrrrrrrr.

xx

I left DD1 when she was 10 months with my mum and dad for about 9 days to go skiing. I did miss her, but after the year we had had with her - she was 3 months prem, I needed a treat. Since then I sent them again to my M&D last summer hols for a week (OK mid week only) they are now 4 and 6 as I hadn't any childcare

If they had doting grandparents then I'd definitely consider it, but we don't so it's hard to imagine.

Unfortunately we have never had one night away (together) in 5 years.

go and enjoy! we have done this (5 days) - loved every minute of it, as did ds and grandparents. of course felt v guilty at times but if you can get away, why not? in times gone, extended family would have been around much more to help anyway (ok not for trippettes to NY, but YKWIM)

Don't feel guilt - go for it. We have done this loads of times and DS loves being with his granparents. He calls it "going on holiday" whenever he says at their house.

Feistybird, you are me, aren't you.