Was it reasonable for the health visitor to laugh when I said I was still bfing my toddler?

[nesomja]

I had the most awful 2 year check for my ds yesterday - large group, personal questions asked publically to everyone (e.g. have you all had smear tests?), organised for every 2 year olds nap time, blah blah blah. Then when we finally did see the HV she actually laughed at me when I said I was still bfing my 26 month old. She said 'this question will sound funny but are you still bfing?'. I said 'oh yes', whereupon she said 'no!, no!, you're not?' and I said 'yes I am' and she just behaved as if she couldn't believe it. I could just see her thinking 'nutty over-involved parent' as she asked 'so you just have one child then?'. Luckily she didn't ask about co-sleeping :)

This whole incident made me feel terrible - she then followed it up by saying I should have started potty training at 18 months and when I said he couldn't sit still for any length of time and showed no signs of readiness suggested I should stop giving him fizzy drinks (he's never had a fizzy drink).

My DH says he doesn't know why I even bothered going but somehow I feel I have to go when I'm asked, but they surprise me every time with how awful they are. Is there any way to challenge this or should I just accept it? I find that I am upset by it and feel judged even though I know I shouldn't. Anyone else had similar experiences?

Thanks for that. Interesting.

Leaving aside the mockery of extended bf (bad, obviously) having a group session for a medical check has to be wholly inappropriate and must be stopped. So may very personal and delicate situation scan be raised, not only developemental but maybe things like DV.

OP, are you going to complain?

Health visitors are very random. Some are lovely and useful. Some are crap and useless. Use the ones you like and ignore the ones that you do not. They are there for you and not vice versa (something that you are welcome to remind them of).

A useless HV told my wife that our 8 week old baby's vomiting could not possible be reflux, leading to a 4 week delay in seeing a paediatrician, our baby dropping to the 0.4th centile and food aversion problems. These have taken the best part of a year to get over.

Not sure worth complaining. Either don't go at all or, if you feel you ought, tell them you want to see someone else.

SoH - Really? It's fab. I started a thread in adult fiction and no one responded recently as the next book is due out beginning of november :-) I'm just re-reading book 12 in prep. Much faster moving than RJ and still had to can't fit it into less than 3 books.
If you are nearby I could lend it to you once DH has finished with it.

The preschool DS2 is at know he's still BF and are really pro. They think it's fab particularly as he is so full of life and cheerfully independent.

Why not worth complaining? Why not do it so no one else gets treated liek this!
And I agree the group format of the check was as bad as the bf comment.

How horrible is she I would definatley complain they are supposed to support you :)

WoT, sadly I am nowhere near you. I have them all in paperback and always wait for it in paperback, but this one's taking an age to be released. And the covers have changed so the more recent ones don't match. I've read some brilliant things about it. I adored RJ but the tropes were somewhat repetitive. Yes, Nynaeve tugs her braid, I know. And Lan (pause to think about Lan, aherm) never walks, he strides. We get it.

Unprofessional behaviour should always be challenged.

She has influence and could actually damage the well-being of children in her care.

Her job is to inform, advise and support - not to MOCK the legitimate choices that mothers make.

Lan........middle distance gaze

We always waited in the past for the PB but impatience got the better of us (Dh and me, not the royal we )
Brandon wotshisface gets 'blood and ashes' wrong though tsk. Apart from that well worth the wait imo.

I didn't like the group format at my DS's 12 month check. But my local HVs are pretty good. They are very up to date, pro-BF but not in a pushy way and very pro-BLW.

Sounds like your HV needs retraining. And if she's being allowed to expound her misinformed views, the rest of them probably need retraining too. I would definitely highlight it.

SoH it's not long to wait now, 7th October the paperback comes out.

WoT - I'm glad you think it's good, I've been nervous! Yes the striding, the tugging, the sniffing, the adjusting of clothes. Does get rather 'grrrr' at points :)

I've just pre-ordered it Alibaba!

And Mat? Perrin and I'd get on board but Mat? Better than Rand I suppose.

Tis SOH btw, messing about on another thread.

Nah I couldn't go there with Perrin, I don't like beards

There is an longstanding difference of opinion as to who is the better character . Me: Mat , DH and DF: Perrin. But he's such a drip. Especially once Faile comes ont he scene

Oh Faile can feck off. Sulky mare.

Perrin's just so lupine. Mat's a jester. I do not want to get it on with a clown.

definietely complain

that is fucking hideous

I haven't been laughed at for still feeding gecko and she is 3 and a half

and I tell you if anyone laughed or negatively commented on it they would be on the business end of a hissy fit I cant tell you

i'm angry for you

Fucking hell - I just had DS's (very late) 2 year check and when I said I was still breastfeeding she said 'oh fantastic, well done you, that'll really help with the calcium intake and it's amazing that you are still going. Good for you'.

They aren't all deranged nutters.

Please complain.

Have you a lot of time on your hands no longer confused Indith? I suspect not.

I could make time. Dd is addicted to shrek, especially the first one where there is lots of dragon. She likes dragon. Ds is addicted to Toy Story. That should give me a few hours a day

Never seen Toy Story in this house. DD is so obsessed with Shrek that I've actually developed the ability to no longer see it. The colour ogre green no longer registers. Like Serafina Pekkala if you will, the eye just slips past. Not long till Christmas. You can watch Shrek The Halls together. That I can still tolerate.

You see I want 1980s inspired wallpaper in dd's room. She wants this.

Are those the characters from Madagascar with them? Why? I've not seen Shrek the Third, have I got a big hole in my Shrek storyline?

You need to introduce her to Toy Story, that way you get a little variety.

Indith it is a brilliant series if you like the medieval fantasty genre, but it will swallow hours and hours of your life.
I read most of them when I should have been paying more attention to my degree

My HV was very supportive of extended BF and was co-sleeping with and BF her own two-year-old daughter :)

Otoh she was slightly loopy Catholic and seriously tried to tell me and DH that we were wrong to stop at two children and ought to have as many as possible (was actually quite pissed off that we were quite happy with two)

I used to read nothing but fantasy in various forms until degree and children took over but I'm sure I can handle a return :)

Anyhoo, extended bf....