run 'em out of town

[Tortington]

does anyone else think we are a visious lot?

the tone on mumsnet can be disturbing
is that sensitivity thresholds have been lowered or smirky nasty inbetween the line kinda comment more privalent?

any one else any views?

Oh that was easy...sorry couldn't figure it out..too much wine I think!!

I have to say I have noticed an increase in the amount of arguments recently. It has in the past made me stop posting til it's all died down. It would be a shame to see you go though Custardo, I enjoy your posts.

we seam to go through phases like this. Personnally I hate it and avoid the site for a week or two till it dies down - I have enough bickering to deal with in my real life without wasting time reading it on here.

This time though things feel different, a little more hurtful and somehow childish. I hope the chat area can be established soon so the "head girl" and "the other one stinks" type threads can go elsewhere and leave mumsnet more as it was with room to argue about war, circumcision etc (not that those threads didn't themselves get a little hurtful, but at least the topics were worth arguing about).

I think we're in danger of loosing the very type of contributor that made this site worth coming to. You've got to wonder if when our founding sisters set up mumsnet they envisaged the shear extent of computer memory that would be needed to store peoples drinks orders and personal insults......

Well I for one have basically given up. I agree with Batters in that it has changed dramatically. Too much banality, too much personal aggression and too many new names who seem to post once or twice and disappear. It used to feel like a community.

Don't you think the new names post once or twice and then disappear because it's hard to get involved in a community? Some new people get ignored or jumped on. A certain group of mumsnetters are pretty cliquey but then they're also pretty funny as well and i often read their threads but don't post myself.

I agree with October: we all have our own opinions especially on emotive topics where we live and breathe the issues involved - and we're all entitled to them. It can take your breath away when people jump on you but it can also be good - makes you analyse your opinions or strengthen them too.

We have to remember that text can be taken the wrong way and we have no visible personalities to soften things - so can't be too sensitive, I suppose. Oh, and try to be circumspect in what you say.

I have felt 'got at' in the past too. Although I thought that had kind of stopped. Just a bit disappointed that another thread has been started that slags off the way Mumsnet has 'changed'.

Who exactly are supposed to be run out of town??

Is this similar to a witch hunt... why not start a petition.

Get a grip M2T - not everything is aimed at you. And I don't mean that nastily, but I'll probably get shot for saying it!

Think we all need to remember that we can't have it both ways - this is either a forum for free speech (in moderation) or it isn't. So let people sit at their virtual bar in peace if that's what they want to do, but equally don't get uptight if others post about how dull they find it.

I wasn't saying it was amied at me!!!! I really don't know where you got that from and your comment was uncalled for. I was pointing out that there have been more than a few people GOT AT. Jeeeeeesus. I can't win.

But your comment is right.... there are MANY people in this thread that need to get a grip!

And willow2. I don't think the title of this thread is really implying that it's just people bored by these threads. Do you?

Actually, I think mumsnet is still working really well. Just look at the 'traumatic birth' thread - people can offload their terrifying experiences and others immediately come in with sympathy and outrage on their behalf. I posted on the 'trying to conceive' thread about my sister getting pregnant after years of trying (neither I nor her had posted on it before) and several people immediately came on with sincere congratulations -that's lovely. I also started a 'circumcision' thread recently and was underwhelmed by the response but someone took the time to post that there had been a really contentious thread on the same topic before and she thought people didn't want to get involved again. Fair enough. I could go back and look up old stuff and it was helpful -and not feel ignored.

Mumsnet is still good. There is a bit of sniping, but so what? It's human nature and out of all the messages that are posted it's not actually that prevalent.

But isn't that the point, Willow2, that people should be allowed to sit at their virtual bar in peace or having whatever chat they feel like? I wouldn't walk up to someone in a real bar, listen to what they say and then tell them they shouldn't be allowed to talk like that if I didn't enjoy what they were saying. I'd walk away and leave them to it.

You get sensitivity problems and "smirky between the lines" comments in any large group - particularly one that's 99% hormonal women and, as has been pointed out, you can't tell tone or body language from a typed conversation.

M2T - Chill! I think Willow2 just misunderstood your post.

When I say community, I just mean a forum for an exchange of intelligent views, support and advice on all matters which are in any way linked to parenting with a healthy dose of humour thrown in. This is only my view but looking at the threads now, an awful lot are more chatroom like than anything else. I'm not complaining as such, just commenting that it no longer fits in with what I looked for in a web site. Obviously these things develop along the lines of what the majority members want and it just means i need to go elsewhere.

We definitely need to go back to the Yurt!

Misunderstanding posts is a major trigger for hostility. Perhaps people should think about the different ways a post could possibly be meant in before replying.

But Croppy - surely if you post a question or problem then it will be answered swiftly and wisely by many Mumsnetters. THe chatty threads are just not relevant if you don't want them to be.

Do you not feel that if you started a thread saying that you were, for example depressed, that you would get the apprporiate response?

Surely then Mumsnet is STILL doing the job it was set up for??

Well I'm guilty of getting defensive over someone's posts and in hindsight I should have ignored it a bit more than I did, but hard sometimes when you feel it's you DD that is being 'got at' and defensive mother sprung out. At the end of the day though I think it's great to debate, and heated discussions are bound to crop up with the subjects us girls bring up, we just have to remember that people can't hear the tone we're saying things in or the smile on our face as we type so we should take the time, because it's over the internet, to explain carefully what we mean and I for one am going to try and not be too defensive / sensitive when people discuss kids with special needs. I hope no-one feels they have been got at so much that they feel they have to walk, Mumsnet can be such a huge support. I certainly hope nothing I've ever said upset anyone that much, what a horrible thought.

True Mum2T. I just find posters such as zsa zsa very tiresome and I wish they'd find somewhere else to post their illiterate ramblings rather than ruining what was once a great and intelligent web site. There I've said it!

Ok - Custardo didn't say that she felt anyone should be run out of town, just that the tone of the site has changed considerably recently. Sorry M2T, but I took from your post that you felt a bit got at by this, what with your being "relatively" new to the site and part of the "new wave" of chatty conversations. My mistake. Will now go and shoot myself and save everyone else the bother
Alternatively, will stop posting for ooh at least two weeks.

Sorry, have to add, Croppy - you and me babe. Dull, dull, dull.

xxxx - said I'd stop posting for two weeks. Aargh, i've done it again.

xxxx - said I'd stop posting for two weeks. Aargh, i've done it again.

xxxx - said I'd stop posting for two weeks. Aargh, i've done it again.

xxxx - said I'd stop posting for two weeks. Aargh, i've done it again.

(I always wanted to tell ZsaZsa to off but resisted )

xxxx - said I'd stop posting for two weeks. Aargh, i've done it again.