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Original poster

Would you do this?

308 replies

CountessDracula · 06/06/2005 20:36

Am going away to stay in a hotel. Have a 300m range listening device (dd aged 2.8 is coming with us). There is a beach bar 50 yds away from the hotel. If we checked that the monitor worked and left a radio on in the room on low vol. to ensure that we hadn't lost connection, could we go down to beach bar in the evening or is that really bad? She almost never wakes up in the evening.

OP posts:
Original poster
CountessDracula · 06/06/2005 23:26

No am not angry, just amazed that someone can say that this is neglect.

I guess that means that all hotels that offer baby listening services where they are on reception (which in a big hotel could be much more than 50yds from the room) are guilty conspiring to neglect babies? Joash were that the case then there is NO WAY that hotels would offer this service.

I suggest you phrase your advice in less hysterical terms in future.

OP posts:
joash · 06/06/2005 23:27

using a baby monitor whilst leaving the building and going a further 50yds away to a bar - lots of people think that's adequate supervision - mmmmm Ok then.

I'm not here to justify anyones choices, simply responding to a question.

Original poster
CountessDracula · 06/06/2005 23:27

Anyway am off to bed to neglect my child by not using monitor.

OP posts:
Original poster
CountessDracula · 06/06/2005 23:28

(and to be an arse, don't forget that joash)

OP posts:
joash · 06/06/2005 23:30

tut tut

lemonice · 06/06/2005 23:33

I think CD is weighing up the pros and cons and taking the general temperature/consensus to help..make an informed decision which will help when they go on their holiday

Fran1 · 06/06/2005 23:34

Whats the harm in taking her with you and letting her fall asleep wherever you are?

I spent all my childhood summers asleep in corners of discos and bars! Wouldnt have wanted it any other way in case i "missed out" .

This way you can spend all night in the bar, rather than a quick half hour clock watching until you have to get back!

Gwenick · 06/06/2005 23:35

using a baby monitor whilst leaving the building and going a further 50yds away to a bar - lots of people think that's adequate supervision

Is it any different to going down to the end of your large garden to have a drink with friends/DH and using a monitor????

Or putting the bins out WITHOUT using the monitor?? Something I have to do regularly - as the 'garden bin' lives in the back garden, and to get it to the front to be emptied I have to go through the next door neighbours garden (communal path - old victorain terraces) down the passageway, up the street and then go back again???

aloha · 06/06/2005 23:43

CD - you don't need this!
Your adored little madam neglected? Hmm...think not!

soapbox · 06/06/2005 23:46

Oh for goodness sake - neglect. Talk about an over reaction!

joash · 07/06/2005 00:13

What is the point of asking a question and responding aggressively to an answer that isn't liked?
In addition, stating a fact is not an over reaction. An over reaction would be getting defensive, swearing, resorting to name calling, etc, etc. But surely MN's are too grown up for that aren't they?

Flossam · 07/06/2005 00:20

Woah Joash. I don't blame CD for being defensive. You are accusing her of neglect. I don't know of anyone who would not be defensive at that.

Having said that CD I don't know that I could. But then this is I who still checks on DS at least five times of an evening before bed and on any night time toilet trips to make sure he is still breathing. He's 7 months now so I really should relax a bit! I hope you have a lovely holiday.

joash · 07/06/2005 00:21

Actually - I said the act itself was neglect. Can't actually accuse anyone of being neglectful if they haven't actually done anything (semantics - but true).

morocco · 07/06/2005 00:23

neglect is a pretty big thing to accuse a mother of (and just not applicable in this case at all.) I'm not surprised CD got pissed off about it.

joash · 07/06/2005 00:26

Semantics again - I'm not going to argue semantics all night. Night all.

Flossam · 07/06/2005 00:31

Read the thread Joash. Other mothers have said they have done this. It's not just CD you are sayng this about.

Gillian76 · 07/06/2005 00:31

I couldn't do this and my children are good sleepers. I would never leave them unsupervised. Suppose I am worried about all the scenarios mentioned - fire, illness, someone coming into the room, etc. But worst of all is that it wold be happening to them alone without me being with them. What if there was a fire and you couldn't get to them?

I do worry more than most people I know, however and it's your decision. My BiL has done this with his kids using the hotel listening service. They have been fine. Just don't think I could relax. Don't they have a babysitting service too?

assumedname · 07/06/2005 00:40

I've done this. When I was at uni in Germany with dh, had dd 22 months with us. Took the baby monitor and went to the Heimbar downstairs and down the corridor. Well within baby monitor listening distance. Dd extremely good sleeper.

I used to stay about 30 minutes, dh would stay longer.

motherinferior · 07/06/2005 08:57

Well, we haven't used a baby monitor since DD1 was a few months old; DD2 never had one (I did try but it picked up Strange Noises from a baby miles away, too spooky). And they sleep upstairs and we - gasp - put the telly on downstairs and rely on our house's crap acoustics to hear them and yes, sometimes you'll hear that one of them has been crying for a bit and yes of course we dash upstairs - but quite honestly I have no urge, whatsoever, to put a monitor in.

I also think - [pause for another gasp of horror] that you need a holiday too. With a bar and all.

Toothache · 07/06/2005 09:01

CD - I did this to go to a party next door. I was riddled with guilt afterwards as we couldn't hear him crying over the music!

He hadn't been crying for long, but we were used to the monitor blasting out his cries, but at nextdoors house the signal was weaker, therefore quieter.

I would definitely be more worried about someone kidnapping them than them choking on their own vomit! I wouldn't want to lock the door in case there weas a reason they had to get out the room quick and couldn't coz I'd locked them in.

aloha · 07/06/2005 09:18

Hey CD, mentioned this barmy thread to dh last night as we were going to bed, and he said, 'But we've already done this' in a puzzled tone. And of course we have. Went to a hotel after a Christening, put ds (then about 20months) in a cot, and went downstairs to dinner...and even - gasp! - went for a stroll around the very nice grounds with a G&T in hand. We didn't think twice. The hotel actually provided the baby monitor so we certainly weren't the first couple to neglect their happily sleeping baby is such a shocking fashion.
And guess what? the hotel didn't burn down or anything! How amazing is that?
CD is planning to take a baby monitor. For those of you who haven't heard of such amazing devices, let me tell you (sounds like Scottish hotel-keeper in LIttle Britain) - these wondrous things let you hear -! - the sounds of your infant. So if they get out of their cot, start rubbing two sticks together to make fire, yell or otherwise disturb the peace, you hear them. Just as if you were in your own home.
I still cannot see any reason why this is different to being in the garden in the evening, frankly.

aloha · 07/06/2005 09:19

As CD's girl is in her cot, she couldn't get out anyway!

Enid · 07/06/2005 09:19

I would probably do it but dh wouldnt

aloha · 07/06/2005 09:19

And saying this is neglect is NOT stating a fact, it is stating an opinion. Quite different.

Enid · 07/06/2005 09:20

neglect

havent read the thread but that's pretty strong

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