wedding anniversary etiquette

[hatsoff]

quick question - if you were invited to a 10th wedding anniversary party would you turn up with a present?

Yes

yes - probably something like a photo frame or a plant in a nice planter.

bugger - wrong answer. After much umming and ahing dh and I have decided to have a party for our tenth. And - too late - it has suddenly occured to me that people might bring presents. I'd be really really mortified. Ok if it was our 25th but 10th? All we want is to treat a few of our really dear friends to a good meal out.(and make up for our on the cheap wedding) the anniversary milarkey is a bit of an excuse if we're honest.

why not just tell them that in the invite.

cos they've already gone out!

could you ring the guests and say that even though they have been invited they should not feel obliged to get a present. If some people still want to turn up with something then just ask them to bring a bottle and everyone could share it at the "do" then.

we've asked people to rsvp by email so when they do we'll probably respond - glad you can come etc and say something then. They're all very close friends so something along the lines of "don;t even think about bringing a pressent" would, I guess, be acceptable.

How about a cheque made out to Christian Aid, if they really insist ............

I would say thats fine hatsoff. Don't forget the ettiquette if they do turn up with something though- smile and say shit.

I think such a suggestion would be an intrusion on their privacy. especially if I made it at tea time or bed-time