ah, meant hackles rise
I think the half day nursery slot is just right for some down time. After years of looking after under 3s anyone deserves it.
But I do feel differently about a parent of a school age children and plans to do stay at home full time. If you can afford to do this, if your partner earns enough for you not to have a job, then you are very lucky. I wish I was you! If you say you love it, know how lucky you are, then good luck to you. If you also fit in voluntary work, school help, studying, great -as long as you keep saying how lucky you are to be able to do this.
I do have a problem with parents who are not employed, don't study or do voluntary work, don't help with a business or organisiation, don't have children or relatives to care for, but still think their working life is just as full of pressure as those who go out to work full time.
I have been a full time SAHM, but only due to insurance pay outs and a legacy. The rest of the 11 years I've been a mother, I have been the main, full time working breadwinner. For a couple of those years, I had two jobs,(12 hour days, 6 days a week) to keep us financially about water. My dh has had jobs and a business, but not as well paid as mine - and he has spent more time being at home full time than me. For the last year, finally, we are both in reasonably well paid, reasonably family friendly jobs that we like. This for us is by far the happiest solution. My dh is a much happier person now he is has a job he likes. I am much happier person because he is happier, more fulfilled and has lifted the financial burden from me.
Speaking as the main breadwinner, when I was working those long hours, it totally pissed me off that my partner was not contributing financially to our familiy. It didn't matter how much housework, cooking and childcare he did (and he did lots). It was valuable work, but it was inappropriate work for the situation we as a family were in. I was near to physical and mental collapse but because the jobs were 'interesting' and I was pretty good at them, no one took my complaints seriously. I have encountered women whose partners work long, stressful hours, who say their husband love their work, who are not well off, who can work but choose not to, and I cannot understand it. And it makes me angry.
I haven't got round to saying anything about my best male friend. He and his partner have no children. He doesn't have to care for anyone. His wife works in the city and earns good money. He has spent the last 10 years studying on and off, as and when he wants, going to the gym, shopping for the house, collecting antiques, and when I see him, he tells me how busy he is, every bit as busy as me, and isn't life hard. I could hit him! Now if he said, 'aren't I lucky' I'd have no problems at all.